Weblog of teach_me (445)

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12 Jun 06 bmw (12 Jun 06, 10:57 AM by teach_me)

A lady walks into a BMW dealership. She browses around, spots thetop-of-the-line Beemer and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to feel the fine leather upholstery, she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materialises in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady with, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Very [more...]
12 Jun 06 speeding (14) (13 Jun 06, 3:55 PM by teach_me)

While I was driving down the M60 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have been) I passed under a bridge only to see a policeman on the other side with a radar gun, laying in wait. The policeman pulled me over, walked up to the car and, with that classic, patronising smirk, asked: [more...]
10 Jun 06 flags (10) (12 Jun 06, 1:19 AM by teach_me)

ok for those of you that insist on driving round with england flags on your car contemplate this [more...]
9 Jun 06 why? (14) (12 Jun 06, 1:39 AM by teach_me)

why is it that emmerdale is on at 10pm? .......... why cant they put the football on later? ......... why is grass green ..... why do i get such satisfaction from pouring salt on a slug that just ate my new plants ......... why have i not remembered to get a new battery for my clock when i have been looking at it all week stuck on 6.30 ..........why do i always run out of paint 6 inches from the end of what im painting .......... and why the hell have i just had a bath with freezing cold water ahhhhhhh i have an answer for that one ..............the damned boiler went out and i couldnt be bothered [more...]
5 Jun 06 wheres the sleep gone (2) (9 Jun 06, 9:12 PM by teach_me)

how frustrating is it when you cant sleep......... you lie there for ages and your head starts spinning you try to switch off and the more you try the more your brain starts running round in circles .......... so you pick up a book then realise you're old now and you cant read without your glasses and they are downstairs ........ so you lie there a bit longer ... then give up get up have a hot choccy and think ill go online for a bit have a nice chat ............. you get here and every one else is asleep .......... typical.... so you think ill know ill write some random crap and see if anyone reads [more...]


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