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IC : Weblogs : billybofh : "Rampant fish-beasts are eating my Chinchilla's"
Rampant fish-beasts are eating my Chinchilla's
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Posted by billybofh on Tue 10 Dec 02, 11:36 PM
"Gerroff!!! B*stards!!!!! Grow your own Chinchilla's!!!!!"
.....
Last spring I planted a little Chinchilla in the garden,
hoping that it would bear fruit in time for this
Christmas (well, it's so much cheaper than buying them -
and you can always put them in a poly-bag and dump them
in the river after xmas).
Anyway - by this time last week I had about 6
Chinchilla's sprouting out in the garden. I'd covered
them in a good strong wire mesh to stop the crows
pecking at their little eyes, but no-one told me about
the bloody fish-beasts! Jeez!
Once those things get established in your garden it's a
hell of a job to shift them! Let me tell you! God! I
was chasing them with a shovel, pouring petrol on them
(although a little got onto next-doors kids, so I had to
hold off on that one), setting them on fire (though
again, the next-door neighbour kid situation was a bit
"tricky" - think I'm off their xmas-card list... again...).
Nothing would shift them! Then they started to attack
the little chinchilla's! Bloody fish-beasts just kept
rubbing brine onto their fur, poking them with slices of
lemon, shaking breadcrumbs over them and calling them
"little rats"!
So eventually I decided to go down to a friends house
and borrow his pack of viscious sardines, thinking
they'd "have a go" with the fish-beasts (well, we all
know how agressive sardines are when faced with a
bullying fish-beast).
But then the flippin' fish-beasts teamed up with the
sardines, and now both of them are attacking the poor
chinchilla's!
Which leads me back to.....
....
"Gerroff!!! B*stards!!!!! Grow your own Chinchilla's!!!!!"
Edited Tue 10 Dec 02, 11:37 PM by billybofh
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