Sort by last reply . bethy4ever's profile
| 21 Feb 07 | thoughts on gender (2) | (21 Feb 07, 7:33 PM by penwiggle) |
| So, in about two weeks I have an appointment at Claybrook with the ogre (best name I have for him, he scares me) about whether I can have surgery this year. The problem is he's gonna want to know that I am best suited as a girl. Well, sure, of coure I am suited for it but I don't think I know myself. What I mean is I'm not really sure who I am. I need some security in this and guiding and it all feels rather scary. Dad can't help me, too obsessed with his own issues that he should have put behind him long ago but they are his security blanket. Mum tries to help me, but we don't see things the same [more...] | ||
| 18 Feb 07 | sunday de funday (2) | (19 Feb 07, 6:06 PM by GazUK1963) |
| I wants to say a big thank you and give ginooormous cuddles to those who i met todays in brum brum, those of you who recognised the smallish girl hiding under a pink bonnet with eeyore on her back and a teddy under one arm- Cats Claws (i think thats it), Qwoin, adi and partner, tv maid jane, gary and partner, and my lg friend from elsewhere suzy with her daddy n uncy, n n lil toerag. Thank yous allls for saying hi. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxx Bethy | ||
| 15 Feb 07 | intimacy without sex (2) | (17 Feb 07, 2:23 AM by fussyone) |
| Is it possible for a relationship ie. Dom/ sub to be intimate, close and touchy feely without being overly sexual? What I mean is with all my issues against sex I still want a close and intimate Dominant who can hold me secure. Intimacy to me means safety and security and I believe it to be more fundamental than sex drive in a relationship. If a couple desire being close to each other and not just sex, surely their relationship can last longer? It's a bit difficult for me to work out where I stand with regards to sex except having a tendency to hate the type of men who think through their penises [more...] | ||
| 14 Feb 07 | bloggging | (14 Feb 07, 9:42 PM by bethy4ever) |
| I'm always totally gobsmacked by how many people read my blog each day. So raise your hands, should i make my own complete blog site and go pro? Get money through putting adverts on it, etc. and would people really pay for my thoughts? | ||
| 14 Feb 07 | please cross your everythings (9) | (14 Feb 07, 6:13 PM by bethy4ever) |
| I want to let people know that it's been two years I've been living as a girl and today I'm off to see the Endocrine guys and well... maybe, just maybe, they might suggest surgery this year. Please keep everything crossed because I can't wait to be a woman and emerge from my cocoon. Love and kind thoughts, how's that for a valentines treat? Bethy | ||
| 13 Feb 07 | always alone (4) | (13 Feb 07, 10:26 PM by bethy4ever) |
| When i find myself in times of trouble Mother Mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom "let it be." BOLLOCKS SHE DOES!!!! Its hard when ya travellin through life wibouts a guide, no one to show de way and keep you safes from harm or nothing. | ||
| 13 Feb 07 | the valentines card mascara | (13 Feb 07, 6:50 PM by bethy4ever) |
| A girl went to three men in the street and said "If you don't send me a card this year I'll tell your wife you're a cheat." The men looked at each other, none of them wanted to be thought of as cheats. The first man went to the house and brought her a card. It said on it "I'd a sent you a card anyway so here you are." The second man knocked on the door and said "If you're the girl sending valentines I'm an air pilot, want to see my chopper?" "No thanks" said the girl, "I've got a chopper of my own in the kitchen." The third time the door bell rang. She called out, "Who is it?" "Valentine's card [more...] | ||
| 12 Feb 07 | No means NO!!! | (12 Feb 07, 8:00 PM by bethy4ever) |
| Theres sometimes a confusion to what the word "No" means. It not mean try again an ask me for its later, not means "me maybe could try it", it mean one thing just no. So I gonna say it to infinity. Nasty, sucky people who only wanna hurt me better learn de word now. no no nonononononon no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no nooooooooooooo! Whether ya online for cyber n dis all just a game or your seeking for a fucktoy, de world still de same NO. I NOT PLAY DAT WAY! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! | ||
| 11 Feb 07 | sillyness (2) | (11 Feb 07, 5:21 PM by bethy4ever) |
| ha, fooled the big bad world again into thinking i was interested in it when i was in cloud cuckoo land painting rainbows and cuddling the care bears singing about how great me is at the top of my voice. Hehehehehehee.. And as for that silly, stupid Evangelist guy - mwuahahahahahaa- I care not for revenge, I am above his low intellect and shall simply watch him rot in the hell he creates by damning others. And the ridiculous am dram group keep topping my wine glass up while i sit lazily waiting for a next bit part, I reckon it could be an easy life if it wasn't so boring. | ||
| 10 Feb 07 | bethy games (1) | (10 Feb 07, 9:27 PM by bethy4ever) |
| 1) Chase- mes favourite, getting caught and play spanked makes it so much more fun. I think it's funny to get caught at bedtime/ bathtime, then of course put to bed with a nice story or share a bath with Someone. 2) Snuggles- oooh yup yup, snuggling be a fun game. You cuddle up togebbers under the covers, read a book together or watch a film and feel all fuzzy and sweet inside. 3) Mess Making- fingerpainting, baking and messy things are really fun for Bethy, so long as her clothes dont get too ruined. 4) Dressing up- She likes to be purty and girly, sometimes she wants to dress as nurse or fairy, [more...] | ||
| 10 Feb 07 | The little girl who wouldn't go bed (1) | (10 Feb 07, 7:57 AM by Da_Pix) |
| There once was a girl who wouldn't go bed, She made one heck of a fuss, She bounced up and dowwn the stairs banging pans Till the police came over in a rush. "If you don't go soon missy then we'll come for you" But she laughed and giggled and jeered, But the parents were worried, afraid it's true, That the police had at all interfered And that night in her room a monster did come, With long muddy hair down its back, It roared and it groaned and it picked up poor missy Then it cuddled her and put her down for a nap. Ah, the sweet little rosebud slept then And if only those silly parents knew They [more...] | ||
| 8 Feb 07 | decorating my new room | (8 Feb 07, 8:15 PM by bethy4ever) |
| So here's the question, do i go completely impulsive, regressive and get the little bunk bed? Go for the four poster bed which can have chains attached? Or the pink four poster little girl princessy one? It be a difficult choice for one lil girly to makes. Advantges of bunk bed: 1) One of them has a double bed underneath, single on top 2) People can sleep over 3) Teddy storage when no one sleeping over 4) Space [more...] | ||
| 8 Feb 07 | decorating my new room | (8 Feb 07, 8:15 PM by bethy4ever) |
| So here's the question, do i go completely impulsive, regressive and get the little bunk bed? Go for the four poster bed which can have chains attached? Or the pink four poster little girl princessy one? It be a difficult choice for one lil girly to makes. Advantges of bunk bed: 1) One of them has a double bed underneath, single on top 2) People can sleep over 3) Teddy storage when no one sleeping over 4) Space [more...] | ||
| 7 Feb 07 | Games Dom/Mes play and things they say | (7 Feb 07, 6:08 PM by bethy4ever) |
| NOTE: References to any particular Dom/Me sub switch or troll may be convenient but is not intentional. If you see the nasty characteristics in yourself maybe step back and look more. [more...] | ||
| 6 Feb 07 | having a vent | (6 Feb 07, 5:11 PM by bethy4ever) |
| It's not that I'm mad, more sort of hurt. They were some pretty cool chat friends but I guess the saying's right, "One Bad Apple Ruins The Barrel". Well this was a very bad apple, getting on his fucking high horse about how being trans was a fucking crime against God. So okay, yes, maybe I'm bad, but I dont' want to let it eat me up. Why should I get upset over a fucking dickhead eh? He's the scum, not me. | ||
| 5 Feb 07 | a little triggered out but i got through it | (5 Feb 07, 10:29 PM by bethy4ever) |
| There's some topics that you really just don't talk about, and though I could understand LoyalTea's angle it was so agressive and violent. He was jumping up and making a big hoo ha and making a fuss and acting just like the people he damned. I don't like this because I have seen my dad do that so much. He has his arse sticking out of his head, he's got so many issues. If it's not 4 by 4's, it's cleanliness, it's everything and I rebel against this because it fucks me off hearing it so much (scuse my language but yes I'm annoyed). Anyway, I dealt with this well because I took myself out the room [more...] | ||
| 4 Feb 07 | things that make me happy | (4 Feb 07, 10:27 PM by bethy4ever) |
| 1) Performing- I love to sing, dance, act, be humiliated, heck just be noticed it's a lot of fun 2) Being spanked 3) Being cuddled 4) Story time | ||
| 4 Feb 07 | the road to positivity (1) | (4 Feb 07, 8:27 PM by NightScentedStock) |
| Deflating afternoon searching for jobs, i sometimes wonder where i get the motivation to carry on at all. It's not like i don't try to apply myself, to even just act average but nothing really works. So I feel tired, worthless and really, seriouslly, totally , utterly fuckerly sucky. | ||
| 3 Feb 07 | boundaries | (3 Feb 07, 3:37 PM by bethy4ever) |
| Boundaries: 1) Being left alone, or quit upon in the middle of something. It makes me feel paranoid that people hate me. 2) Screaming and fighting, I don't even like hearing others have a fight when it's not violent, just heated. I try hard to block it out or solve the fight for others. 3) Bullying. This is big for me because I saw so much of it while I was growing up. My response to this is I become defensive and angry because I feel vulnerable. 4) Penises. I hate them because they make me think of violence and men's power over women. I feel sick when they are brought up in a sexual discussion, [more...] | ||
| 3 Feb 07 | The Babysat (kinky F/f story) | (3 Feb 07, 3:22 PM by bethy4ever) |
| “We're going out” Said Dad. I looked up at him thinking this would be my chance to sneak Dawn into the house. “Cool” I said, “how long are you going to be?” “We'll be all night, the babysitter should be here any minute. I know you're a big girl but it's not a safe neighbourhood.” I sighed; I couldn't believe that at eighteen they till thought I needed a sitter. “Dad, I'm an adult” I protested. “Yep, and we aren't coming back to no wild parties. I think this one is a good match for you” he said quietly as he put on his jacket. Mum came down the stairs. “Oh I picked this one perfectly knowing what [more...] | ||
