| 1 Dec 08 | Pain and Pleasure..... | (1 Dec 08, 6:24 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| Nature has placed mankind under the government of two sovereign masters, pain and pleasure - they govern us in all we do, in all we say, in all we think: every effort we can make to throw off our subjection, will serve but to demonstrate and confirm this. [more...]
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| 1 Dec 08 | I wonder....... | (1 Dec 08, 1:05 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| If you set to work with a knife that will cut through anything and Tupperware that's guaranteed not to break, what happens? |
| 28 Nov 08 | Just keep swimming.............. (6) | (1 Dec 08, 1:07 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| 20 lengths today!
I can feel gills starting to develop. |
| 24 Nov 08 | W.T.F..sleeping on the sofa??? (7) | (25 Nov 08, 5:37 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| I have just found out that my Dad ( see the previous blog) is sleeping on the sofa in his own home!!!
That is because my step mother's 90 year old mother is staying there!!!! My 30 something step sister has all 4 of her kids there as usual ( even though she has a place of her own!!!) and my step brother still lives at home ( 30 something, fit,able bodied!)is in his room....YET MY 77 YEAR OLD FATHER WHO IS MOST PROBABLY DYING IS SLEPPING ON THE SOFA.....WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THAT HOUSE FULL OF ADULTS WHO SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE CAREFUL, SENSITIVE AND SENSIBLE DECISIONS????
I am shaking as I [more...]
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| 22 Nov 08 | Shadow of a man (5) | (24 Nov 08, 12:09 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| Well the swimming certainly didn't bugger up my ability to move so I decided to drive my son and I to Walsall.
We had great fun at a Diwalli festival; eating samosas, making masks and listening to very loud Hindi music...my ears are still ringing!
On our way back we called into see my Dad.
I haven't seen him for a couple of months due to not being able to drive and him also not being able to drive due to his diabetes which has been playing up recently.
The man I saw today was not my Dad.
The frail, thin and gaunt figure that greeted me was an old man, not the man I know as Dad and my son knows as [more...]
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| 21 Nov 08 | In at the deep end (5) | (21 Nov 08, 2:51 PM by RebelT) |
I swam 10 lengths today, didn't even think I would manage one at first.
The water felt very strange because I have numb areas round my body, particularly on my hands and arms.
I was surprised at how strong my legs were given that they don't always work when I want them to.
I could have swam further, but I neeeded to know how I would be afterwards.......feeling ok at the moment, no aches and pains....wait till tomorrow morning!  |
| 8 Nov 08 | One Giant step for Judekind! | (8 Nov 08, 6:32 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| I managed to do it tonight.
It has been a struggle up until now.
I spent time planning and organising the space I needed.
I have often failed before.
I nearly resorted to asking for help but being a stubborn and bloodyminded Capricorn I just kept plodding on.
I lay there naked surrounded by candles and warm water plucking up courage to start.
I held the blade, poised ready for action.
Then I struck......
I finally shaved my legs!!! [more...]
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| 17 Oct 08 | Weekend of the Steroids (4) | (17 Oct 08, 5:37 PM by GazUK1963) |
| It's 08.59 and I am contemplating going to have my shower in order to get myself ready for the day - not an ordinary day-but a day which could change my life for a few weeks, months or even years. [more...]
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| 9 Oct 08 | Anniversary - woo hoo! | (9 Oct 08, 5:56 PM by beatabeatrix) |
Just realised I have been on IC for 2 years today...and where has it got me  |
| 8 Oct 08 | Gimme the Drugs!!! (5) | (8 Oct 08, 8:34 PM by beatabeatrix) |
Treatment day looms.....
Friday 17th Oct for a whole weekend, not my idea of a weekend away but the bed and food are free along with some needle play!
Thank you to all the fellow IC'ers who have messaged me and given me much neeeded support and advice.
I just hope I am skipping out of the ward on Sunday night!
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| 29 Sep 08 | Diagnosis MS (14) | (30 Sep 08, 10:43 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| It was confirmed today that I have the early stages of Multiple Sclerosis.
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| 28 Sep 08 | Hospital Tomorrow....... (4) | (29 Sep 08, 9:06 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| At last the appointment I have been waiting for since my surgery in July.
I hope that the consultant will now be able to give me some treatment to aleviate my symptoms and let me lead a "normal" life instead of having to rely so heavily on the good will of others!
My biggest goal is to be able to drive properly...further than the end of my village without my legs packing up and having to be rescued by friends!
To walk without my stick and not be frightened of falling over, to walk freely and not have to think about it! Oh to run as well......that may come later-I hope!
TO BE ABLE TO WEAR MY HIGH [more...]
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| 23 Sep 08 | Creation.......your thoughts please. (3) | (23 Sep 08, 7:11 PM by quietsoul) |
| "Woman was created from the rib of man: Not from his head to be thought of only, nor from his hand to be owned, nor from his foot to be beneath, but from under his arm to be protected, from his side to be equal, and from his heart to be loved..". |
| 21 Sep 08 | Heartbreak and Hope (2) | (22 Sep 08, 2:31 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| "All our young lives we search for someone to love. Someone who makes us complete. We choose partners & change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak & hope. All the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, there's someone perfect who might be searching for us". |
| 21 Sep 08 | What is love? | (21 Sep 08, 6:33 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| "Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, Deep-burning and unquenchable." Bruce Lee |
| 21 Sep 08 | That morning feeling........ | (21 Sep 08, 2:55 PM by beatabeatrix) |
| Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
- Emo Phillips |
| 12 Sep 08 | An obsession..... (2) | (13 Sep 08, 1:31 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| "Love is as much of an object as an obsession, everybody wants it everybody seeks it, but few ever achieve it, those who do, will cherish it, be lost in it, and among all, will never...never forget it." [more...]
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| 9 Sep 08 | Smurfs..... (3) | (9 Sep 08, 3:35 PM by David_uk) |
| If you choke a Smurf what colour would it turn? |
| 5 Sep 08 | Russian roulette (4) | (7 Sep 08, 7:33 PM by BigFrank20) |
| "If somebody says, "I love you," to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol-holder requires? "I love you, too." Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. in Wampeters, Foma and Granfalloons
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| 3 Sep 08 | Achievement...... | (3 Sep 08, 9:50 AM by beatabeatrix) |
| An achievement is bondage.It obliges one to a higher achievement.
~ Albert Camus quotes
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