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| Emmaline |
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| 18 May 12 | i hate pain... (1) | (18 May 12, 7:42 PM by GazUK1963) |
| ...but right now, i'd let him cane me till i bled, if it would help. [more...] | ||
| 18 May 12 | It's one thing.. (1) | (18 May 12, 3:45 PM by Incandescence) |
| .. to be desperately sad, with tears just running down your face unconsciously, cos of broken trust. [more...] | ||
| 16 May 12 | happy birthday Sir :-) | (16 May 12, 11:13 PM by Emmaline) |
| I loves ya lots and lots and lots, I know you dislike birthdays, so thank you for allowing one who cares for them spoil you a little. [more...] | ||
| 14 May 12 | can't get back to sleep -- silicone scar sheets (1) | (14 May 12, 1:06 PM by FluffySub) |
| Am annoyed. Nay, angry. Horrendous dream, details lost, but have left me wanting to kill someone! And.Him, how dare he not be here when I searched for him! Anyway. An aside. I've been using these silicone gel sheets for my ICD scar. When they are on, its lovely. But the things say to use them between 18-24 hrs a day. I don't mind the 24, really. Sometimes it involves hunting them in the middle of the night, but shrug. But the last few days, it's been too much. Afterabout 10 hours it begins really sensitive. Like fresh cut sensitive. Like razor blade attacking. [more...] | ||
| 29 Apr 12 | a cruel and unusual punishment... (2) | (1 May 12, 10:16 AM by Emmaline) |
| He's reading Liz Jones's diary. [more...] | ||
| 24 Apr 12 | I have got to try... (2) | (24 Apr 12, 6:01 PM by IrrepressibleSoul) |
| ... wasabi chocolate... [more...] | ||
| 24 Apr 12 | when things go "wrong" ....... (2) | (24 Apr 12, 3:18 PM by Persia_Porsche) |
| .. even if nothing happens, and all is actually ok! Why not be the person to hold them? when are we supposed to get over the fact someone else will do that? [more...] | ||
| 23 Apr 12 | great | (23 Apr 12, 1:37 AM by Emmaline) |
| The fucking bastard thoughts have come back. This time because I said I'd tell him what happened "before" and I'm gonna ruin his thoughts of me. I desperately want to destroy my skin. Knock myself out with tablets (what will be the point now I have this device to shock me alive?), just cut my chest open, so the pain of someone else finding out I got what I asked for its gone. [more...] | ||
| 22 Apr 12 | I just love... | (22 Apr 12, 12:29 AM by Emmaline) |
...watching Him do stuff. Practical stuff. Man stuff  [more...]
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| 20 Apr 12 | when... | (20 Apr 12, 1:18 AM by Emmaline) |
| It's all about mushy music, and you want to hold and maybe cry or make love. [more...] | ||
| 19 Apr 12 | Hmm... (2) | (21 Apr 12, 1:21 AM by Emmaline) |
| ... So, it looks like I'm not allowed pants at the moment. [more...] | ||
| 17 Apr 12 | sometimes.. (4) | (19 Apr 12, 10:00 PM by Emmaline) |
| ...I want nilla. I want to have a normal relationship. I want to be worth the Man I lost my virginity to, for us to have played up, had fun, and moved on to building our house, kids, [more...] | ||
| 17 Apr 12 | I am in the mood... (12) | (17 Apr 12, 11:32 PM by Emmaline) |
| ...for a particularly violent blow job. As in giving one. Which is odd for me, cos apart from one Man, I've only been able to go down on men a handful of times. I want teeth involved, thighs bruised, him passing out in pleasure. I want him to buck under my mouth forcing himself deeper, I want his stomach to clench, I want to bite his legs, stomach, chest, then sit on him and smother him. [more...] | ||
| 12 Apr 12 | ooh big bang (1) | (12 Apr 12, 10:57 PM by Twistee) |
| was very exciting for about an hour or so until the MoD spoiled it all by telling us what it was... [more...] | ||
| 10 Apr 12 | beta blockade and female orgasms (4) | (12 Apr 12, 8:50 PM by Emmaline) |
| Hi all, just wondering if any ladies out there have had big O problems on beta blockers? I'm still enjoying sex, and coming when He does (Him coming is a major turn on for me), but no longer coming with wand/dildo or on top. Am still enjoying it, don't get me wrong. But also recovering very quickly fro.m the almost-coming. Seconds later I am like "yeah, and....." [more...] | ||
| 2 Apr 12 | dreading it (2) | (2 Apr 12, 7:39 PM by sub_65) |
| I don't want Him to look after me. I don't want the operation. I don't want to be ill. I don't want him to have given up time to see me in hospital. I. don't want my chest cut open. I don't want to have had kids who may have a disease that means they may die at puberty. [more...] | ||
| 29 Mar 12 | Ifeel lost (3) | (30 Mar 12, 12:07 AM by MistressYolande) |
| I just wanna be in bed at home, even with my Him at his folks. [more...] | ||
| 26 Mar 12 | Navivolol/nadolol - beta-blockade (4) | (28 Mar 12, 12:56 AM by Emmaline) |
| Been so sleepy the last week or so. Sun/mon i had lots palpitations so they left me tired afterwards. Tuesday i was started on beta-blockade on Nabivolol (2.5mg). Been still having palpitations, but not so heavy, not lasting so long. Found out yesterday that actually i should be on Nadolol. [more...] | ||
| 17 Mar 12 | addendum: heart stuff. (2) | (17 Mar 12, 10:09 PM by mmutie) |
| if anyone has experience of an ICD, can they contact me, please? [more...] | ||
| 17 Mar 12 | Giving up electro-play :( (5) | (18 Mar 12, 12:46 PM by sassysub_lime) |
| So. It looks like i have to give up any form of electro-play. Stupid heart has not recovered from October, and as they did not check my notes to see what was goin on, they did not realise i had a prolonged QT interval 5 years before i had my cardiac arrest. [more...] | ||
