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| Puddin_Von_Puss |
on Tue 28 Mar 06, 8:18 PM to Puddin_Von_Puss's blog.
Steph is my best mate, has been for a few years now. She lives next door but one and barely a day has gone by over the last few years that I haven't sat on her sofa. There's nothing she doesn't know about me and vice versa.
Steph is terminally ill with a brain tumour and only has a few days left.
I've been going to see her every day in the hospice. Over the last year she's probably spent about a quarter of her time there. It's a fantastic place and has been a real home away from home for her. She lives on her own and during the various treatments she's had, she's gone in there for care.
Her family, as you can imagine are with her all the time. Her Mum has been amazing and has spent all her waking hours at her bedside, apart from popping home to make her the most amazing rice pudding. That stuff has done her more good than any of the treatment they gave her. Its got a special ingredient; its full of mothers love. I had the chance to have a conversation alone with her last week. It was just ten minutes, but I had the chance to tell her I loved her and I'll miss her. She said she's never stop looking after me and she'd always be close to me. I feel like I want to say so much more to her and tell her that I'll see her in another life somewhere, but we haven't been alone since. I need to get that time, that ten minutes, or I'll always regret not saying it.
I've never met anyone like Steph. She has been ill as long as I've known her. This is her second brain tumour over the last few years along with the fact that she's epileptic, diabetic and has a few other things wrong with her too. We always said she needed rubbing out and drawing again. She's never been one for dwelling on her health. She'd keep you updated and talks about what's happening next and her hospital appointments, but she has never treated any of it as anything other than an inconvenience. Steph has always been, and is still the most positive person I know. She never let the possibility of her cancer killing her even creep into her mind. Even though she now knows that she has lost her fight, and what a fuckin fight it has been, she is still Steph. Strong, brave and funny. We still talk shite and mess around. We've been sitting with those sick bowl things on our heads talking the piss out of anyone that moves, as if we were sitting on her sofa, without a care in the world. Thing is, she doesn't have a care in the world now. Nothing else for her to worry about. Nothing to keep her awake at night. Nothing to stop her closing her eyes and falling asleep.
| 28 Mar 06, 8:24 PM Bigkev UK, 7 yrs |
Sending you and her all our thought from one neigbour to another kazz, I know how hard it is to watch someone who's that ill losing the fight, I watch my grandad die at the age of 7 from bowle cancer from the time he was in the home in Brookvale, it's very hard to watch, sending out the Runcorn love to you both. Kev. (8*8) Dr_Bigkev Edited 29 Mar 06, 9:21 AM by Bigkev | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 8:24 PM saffy_sub UK, 6 yrs |
What a lovely message - you two are truly lucky to have found each other. I hope you are able to find the time to talk to your friend in the way you want and need to saffy xxx | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 8:24 PM mini_velvet UK(EH), 6 yrs |
You are lucky to have each other. Love to you both. xxxx Easy? You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suction, and gag reflex, and all the while bobbing up and down, moaning and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy? Honey, they don't call it a job for nothin'! | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 8:25 PM River_Deep UK(M), 6 yrs |
I lost a dear friend a few years ago to a secondary brain tumour - she was 35. She was happy vibrant and so full of life for all around her until she physically couldnt be. My heart and love goes to you Kaz. D xx
Its not what you say or do, its how you say or do it | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 8:29 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
I hope so too. I feel like i want to say so much, but nothing at all. Loved up, toe tapping, raspberry blowing, bum pinching, sarcastic, daft as a brush, 30gig, wriggling, kinkster. | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 8:33 PM mini_velvet UK(EH), 6 yrs |
Thats the best kind of friendship- when you dont have to say a thing. I hope you get your time together. x Easy? You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suction, and gag reflex, and all the while bobbing up and down, moaning and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy? Honey, they don't call it a job for nothin'! | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 9:34 PM Sweetiejar UK(S), 11 yrs |
What she said. When you love someone it really doesnt matter if they are your sister, brother or friend. You love them and thats that. Its always horrible to watch someone you love and know that soon they wont be there, will this time be the last time you see them. Make sure you get the time to tell her how you feel and how much you love her and all the things you want to tell her, her mom will give you that 10 minutes because I am sure she sees how much you both care for one another. lots of love to you both hon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Sweetiejar | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 9:54 PM madamdv8 UK, 10 yrs |
J | ||
| 28 Mar 06, 10:02 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
Thanks guys, some good advice there. Its helped x Loved up, toe tapping, raspberry blowing, bum pinching, sarcastic, daft as a brush, 30gig, wriggling, kinkster. |
