Posted by Smartarse
on Thu 23 Feb 06, 4:55 PM to Smartarse's blog.
Why do people get so upset about men taking a leak in public? It's not something I'd do myself, but I have no objection to men who whip it out and take a whizz up against a wall. So long as it isn't my wall.
There have been a couple of memorable occasions in recent times when I've seen men do exactly that. The first time was in Southend. (Oh, Southend - I hear you mutter). I was walking down a street in broad daylight when I happened to pass a gap between two houses and come across a man widdling up a wall there. Naturally I looked away, not wanting to put him off his stroke. Was I offended by the sight of his naked appendage? No, I could barely see it.
On the second occasion, I was in Chelmsford, looking out of the windows of an office block overlooking the churchyard. As I looked down, watching people eating their lunch sitting on the benches, I noticed a man come out of the church. He went round the side of the porch and relieved himself up the medieval stonework. He then went back into the church and no doubt continued the service.
Now I don't see a problem with that. It's a perfectly natural function and it's not a good thing to hold on too long. A couple of hundred yards up to the nearest lavs is way too much. A man can do himself serious damage holding it in like that.
Some people say this kind of behaviour is offensive. I guess only one person has to be offended for something to be offensive. But these people are wrong. It's very very wrong to be offended by something that offends you. Especially if everyone else agrees it's perfectly acceptable to get your plonker out in public when there's an excellent reason for doing so. And weeing is very important. It's probably one of the most important things a person does during their day.
Why are some poor misguided souls offended by the public display of willies? Sadly it's a modern thing, created in our industrial civilization. In primitive societies, weeing in public is not thought of as offensive and in fact public display of penises is almost obligatory. *puts away copy of National Geographic* It's only because we in the West have become obsessed with the secondary purpose of the penis for sexual procreaction and pleasure. We cannot now dissociate it from its primary purpose which is to deliver urine to the bathroom floor, bathroom walls and toilet seat (much harder when it's up though). But really, where is the problem? The penis has two modes: small and floppy for weeing and fat and stiff for sex. Therefore, its obvious when it's in weeing mode and it must surely be acceptable to have it on display.
If you spot a man weeing in public, and are offended by that, simply turn away. Don't stare at him and point and certainly don't shout anything like: 'you're having a wee wee!' because you will make him feel uncomfortable and he may be unable to start or finish properly.
Some would say, this is just exhibitionism. And it's only those with a nice big plonker and a stream that can blast a matchbox fifty yards who want to show off.
Going round the corner of a building to save a few red faces, avoid making someone think about sex at a moment when they don't want to and avoiding offending them - that's too much to ask. Men should be allowed to whip it out and piss where and when they like. It's only natural.
