Posted by kathy_x on Fri 10 Feb 06, 4:08 PM to kathy_x's blog.
Sometimes thats all you need. Just one more stroke to send you reeling into sub-space, to endorphin and for it to be enough to feel 'release'
Its one of those things that is important for a Dom/me to know - how much their sub can take and what amount or intensity will have the 'desired effect' 
I'm lucky in that I dont think (at least in recent memory) that I've ever been in the situation where its not been enough. Or too much. Things have been spot on.
Sometimes knowing that its the last stroke, or the last pulse, or the last touch will bring a mixture of anticipation and emotion.
Is it the hardest one to take because concentration may have been put in to making it build to a crescendo of intensity or because of the emotion that washes over you that its nearly over?
I think its a mixture. I suppose thats why BDSM can be a bit of a head-fuck, having your body driven to that level of pain and pleasure does something weird to the mind. Especially when the scene finishes, its like euphoria and happiness and sadness all in one. It can be so emotional.
Thats why aftercare is so important. You can't take someone *to that place* and then just abandon them.
My BDSM makes me feel special. Not used. Thats the whole point for me.
Sometimes feeling used has its place - you know that dirty, violated, primal feeling lol but you cant play like that all the time! Well maybe YOU can. I cant lol. Different strokes for different folks though
I like to feel special and cherished after play and relaxed and given time to come round.
Although one thing i do not like..i do not like being stroked! Ok ok i love it. Sometimes. lol
It reinforces that the play has been about both of us. Something shared. Not just about him getting his sadistic urges met. Or me my masochistic ones. But us. About us both getting our needs met,and being appreciative of that.
After all BDSM works between two people as a sort of partnership, it has to be give and take from each side.
The problem with having a Dom present in your 'after-space' taking care of you like this, is that it takes longer to switch back into the vanilla you. It makes submission feel a relaxed and calm state and somewhere where you want to be.
kathy -xxx-
