Manchester, and humour (0)

daitchen's profile

Posted by daitchen on Mon 14 Nov 05, 6:56 PM

Last week we were in a severe quandary.

Should we go to Club Hades here in London, only on its third night and especially enticing as we could have attended a hands-on bondage masterclass (it was quite an experience last time, when Nawashi Murakawa suspended me in ultra-tight hemp rope; the marks lasted for over a week!)? Or should we travel up to Kinklusive in Manchester for the day only? (limited funds and no car excluding Nemesis and overnight hotel, sadly).

As Kinklusive was a one-off event that we felt deserved support, we decided to make the effort and go up there. It's been a long time since I woke up to a six am alarm and left the flat at seven, and we'd had a late night before, too, so we were both feeling decidedly bleary as we panted along the platform at Euston barely in time to jump onto the Manchester train.

The driver having thoughtfully ceded right of way to several local and freight trains, we arrived at Kinklusive half an hour late, thus sparing ourselves, it seems, the entry queue!

The first surprise was how few other people seemed to have come up from London and from the south in general, with the exception of workshop leaders and presenters. Considering how many people took the trouble to support Kinkfest here in London by coming from all over the country, this was a bit disappointing, I thought.

Still, the atmosphere was generally cosy and friendly - even though being a bit on the shy side I only really spoke to one new person (good to meet you, Andromalius!). I'd have liked to chat a bit to a few others, but what with some of them being involved in running things, they were so busy that I didn't quite dare. Oh, well...

We watched Tanos, Seraf, lili and amira doing bondage with steel, wood and leather (and bondage tape). The zentai suits were visually very striking and intriguing, especially when combined with steel cuffs and chains, and I did enjoy the inventive, humorous demonstration. Will come back to that in a moment, however.

There were fewer stalls than we'd expected, and unfortunately no food, so we almost emptied our kitty at the train station on some tiny Italian panni-thingies, then headed back to Legends to do some desultory after-lunch shopping, until our eyes lighted on a stack of what for want of a better name I've been calling Insex clamps, and we snapped up a pair of those along with a nice big roll of shiny black tape...

There followed a stirringly eloquent talk on bdsm rights from John Pendal of the Spanner Trust. I'd heard some of it before, particularly his own story, but one new anecdote stuck with me. It seems that a couple visited their GP to get treatment when the sub's eye became temporarily bloodshot after some consensual SM play together. Subsequently the GP reported them to the police and they were prosecuted! Not just the Dom, but the sub too - for allowing herself to be assaulted, apparently. Incredible. Think of the likely consequences of this - I for one would now be less inclined to go to my GP if I was hurt in a scene, and would probably try to treat myself instead. Some Health Service!

The event was brought to an enjoyable climax with the Women Doing Rope Bondage demo. What a beautiful sight - lili's vivid green rope plaits encircling her black zentai, bound to the frame on the left; Violently's fine, intimate head-bondage in the centre, and Ellie's criss-crossing hemp-tethered bunny balancing strenuously on one leg on the right! It was a shame not to have 360 degree vision, so as to be able to take it all in at once!

Too soon we had to leave and hurry to catch our train back home. A good day, with some memorable moments.

A final thought - there was a lot of humour in the Bondage with Steel, Wood and Leather demo. It was well received, and fun, but got me thinking, nonetheless. John Cleese described humour as being the ability to find space in a situation where there is, to all appearances, none. A very useful knack, in personal and social terms, most of the time. It defuses tension, dispels fear. But in a bdsm context, I think humour can sometimes be slightly misplaced. Laughing and messing about can undermine the D/s dynamic, deflate the intensity, and trivialise something meaningful. That said, there have been times when I could hardly stop laughing - afterwards, when we were just lying together, relaxing. But I am uneasy with what might be called the "giggly subby" stereotype, although I do acknowledge the very different nature of public performance to private play.

When I am really playing, usually the last thing I need is humorous "space".

Edited Tue 15 Nov 05, 12:08 PM by daitchen


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