This post is on the Other BDSM web board.
| 9 Aug 05, 10:43 AM Divatje UK(W), 12 yrs   |
There used to be a huge stigma attached to PD's from this site, but it's obviously changed (which is great news and I'm pleased to now contribute to this site). I think that within this profession there are good Dommes and badly skilled ones so picking the wrong Domme can become expensive and demoralising to the client, thereby creating the illusion we're ALL just taking the money without care. Lets also not forget that as a professional dominant we work within the sex industry and while we don't see ourselves as prostitutes we are still classified as sex workers .... Diva - D/s Educator | ||
| 9 Aug 05, 10:46 AM titchfield UK(CF), 7 yrs |
Don't get me started on the ridiculous legal situation surrounding prostitution, porn and sex shops etc etc. A very informative thread, I wonder if it will do any good for anyone? | ||
| 9 Aug 05, 10:48 AM The_Playhouse UK, 7 yrs £ |
[ Is there actually a pro-sub market out there?
[/quote] There are some I know - mainly though pro subs offer themselves for spanking and are female. I suppose spanking bruises less. Many only do it occasionally though, as do many pro dommes. I enjoy scening lots and have several subs who I scene with purely for enjoyment rather than money. With pro domme clients I charge, but the whole dynamics are different and the clients who come are generally very different from subs you meet at events. Subs at events are generally happy to do what you want within the scene (within agreed limits), for how long you want, and are more respectful and thoughtful about the domme. It is much more enjoyable for the domme in my experience, and can lead to a rewarding relationship and deep friendship for both parties. With pro domme clients though in general they know what they want, how long for, and the focus is on them getting what they want and how they feel, and what they can get out of the time. Very few care about the Mistress and many go from domme to domme, always looking for new thrills. For these clients I charge, as it is more like work and I am getting paid for a service I am good at. The few genuine subs I meet as pro domme clients I always encourage out to events, and if they want to continue visiting me and I enjoy scening with them I always negotiate to a tribute or gift they can easily afford, even down to just a box of chocolates. The Playhouse The home of three lifestyle Mistresses where the possibilities are endless... www.the-playhouse.co.uk | ||
| 9 Aug 05, 10:57 AM BlueVelvet UK(B), 9 yrs |
Why do pro dommes get such a bad rep? Personally I feel it's for several reasons; a) There are some really unsafe people out there who call themselves 'professional'!! (There are some really unsafe lifestylers too!), and so they feed the stereotypes. (Fortunately these are far and few between in both sections!). b) An 'I'm better than you' attitude (from some of the lifestylers not the 'pro dommes). (Pro dommes can be seen as easy prey for this type of harassment) c) a failure to realise that the world of professional domination has changed an awful lot since the time of 'Cynthia Pain'! d) Truly 'professional' dominants are not 'hookers with whips' - they spend incredible amounts of time getting to know those that come to see them, pushing limits and fulfilling fantasies. e) Failure to see beyond the stereotype! (Some people don't like to see beyond the box that they put people in, it makes them feel uncomfortable). There's a few others too! However, most of the pro dommes who contribute to the IC boards (and elsewhere), don't fit the old stereotypes. Most are indeed lifestylers, who contribute large amounts of their time and energy to the scene as a whole, and some are the nicest, most genuine people I've ever met! Hmmm but what about pro doms? They rarely get the same amount of hassle, and yet, male professional dominants seem to be on the increase. BV Edited 9 Aug 05, 11:00 AM by BlueVelvet | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 9:59 AM Miss_Violet UK(M), 6 yrs |
I spent a a little while Pro Domming and every day was a pleasure. Why do it for money.....well i needed a job that left me free time to start up a business and one that paid well and put food on the table and paid my bills. There are not many who have the privelege of doing something that gives them great pleasure for a good wage. Did i make lots of money? Well, its a good hourly rate but i did not want a conveyer belt of submissives like some do....they generally get jaded very quickly and are in it for just money. I did a maximum of 2 appointments a day, and that was on very rare occasions. One well planned appointment suited me best and i was never a clock watcher. I loved experiencing new things that perhaps i wouldn't often have come accross.....i have fond memories of a particular sploshie and the wrestling. xx Friends first, Play second, then whatever follows...... | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 5:52 PM duffnutt UK, 10 yrs |
unfortunately as a regular subbie of Pro Dommes I have to say there are one or two I've met who are definately in it for the money, however they are easy to spot and I never go back. Guys who get a bad experience become bitter and tar all pro dommes with the same brush. Most I've met are brilliant and providing a much needed service to those of us without a domme to call our own | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 6:26 PM LadyRed UK, 9 yrs |
isouda if we did it just for the money then we would not need nilla jobs to pay our bills with hun. I part time Pro Domme because I like to play... I like to play with different people and I like to do different things, after that the money has come in handy but when I think about money earned against money spent out on toys/kit/stockings etc I have not made a penny yet. Now that might be bad management on my part but I wont skimp on what I provide a client even if it uses all that they pay me to do it. I do not think doing that =s Pro Domme into this just for the money. My 1st love is to my lifestyle and it always will be. LR
"Standing up and being counted is the 1st step in the right direction" Quote by Red for more years than she can remember | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 7:04 PM LadyRed UK, 9 yrs |
Even those that are full time Pro Dommes don't always earn enough to live on issy... I know that from those who work in the business. I never thought for a moment that your post was a criticism. And I agree that its a skill that should be paid for... maybe those who know less about Pro Dommes would do well to find out what the costing's really are before being so negative. LR
"Standing up and being counted is the 1st step in the right direction" Quote by Red for more years than she can remember | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 7:42 PM Bendy_Trevor UK, 7 yrs |
I wish I could but there just so nice, in a nasty way, of course... -- | ||
| 10 Aug 05, 9:39 PM evil_mouse 7 yrs |
People who get their satisfaction out of criticizing other people's sex lives are, of course, pathetic. People in the BDSM community who criticize other people who are playing consensually and honestly with other other adults are, of course, especially pathetic.
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. I agree saying that a pro-domme doesn't do it for the money seems a tad strange, but just because someone earns their living doing something doesn't mean they don't enjoy doing it at home or for fun either. Rather I would say lucky them for earning their living doing what they enjoy.
