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| CruelLadyScorpio |
on Mon 26 Jan 04, 11:56 PM to CruelLadyScorpio's blog.
Men - grow a beard, stick a flogger in your belt, fold your arms and look mean
Women - wear something tight, swish a crop around and scowl
Easy. To progress to Advanced level:
Don't giggle helplessly when the tawse flies out of your hand and hits the Dungeon Master in the neck
Don't blush when the handle drops off your flogger
Don't fall off your boots
Don't get into a car with a 5' carriage whip - you'll never get it out again
Don't say 'Oh fuck.' when your mini-vibe disappears into your sub's nethers; the commands to 'Push!' and the farting are a planned part of the humiliation
Don't attach TENS unit pads to anything hairy or the end-of-scene afterglow will be marred
Men - don't ever let a sub see you in nothing but a shirt and socks - dignity is not a right, it has to be earned
Women - never, ever let a sub see you in popsocks. Dominant Sex Goddesses do not wear popsocks, period.
Don't stand in front of a mirror when you tell your sub you've covered all the details of the fake kidnap - they'll see you've got your fingers crossed behind your back
Check your spelling before a branding session
Don't tell a sub to suck your finger when you're wearing false nails
Don't leave your pinwheel in unlit areas, on the floor or next to the lube dispenser - it is you who will suffer
When queening, don't get carried away with your 'goddess' spiel and forget all subs have the right to breathe
It's not a good idea to try your hand at needle play when you've just polished off a bottle of Talisker
If you're on the large side, it's probably unwise to make trampling your speciality
Don't retire for the night without checking you've let your sissy maid out of the broom cupboard
It's considered bad form to put your slave into deep subspace so you can watch the match without having to try to explain the offside rule again
Don't hum the theme from 'Pinky and the Brain' during a long bondage session
Do not tell a sub you don't know that you're an expert brat-tamer; he/she will be known locally as 'The Nightmare', and will have tears of humiliation starting in your eyes and a crowd gathering within minutes.
Likewise, don't boast that you can outlast any sub; he/she will turn out to be the President of the World Pro-sub Union, and you'll leave the club on a stretcher
Don't bid in slave auctions; you're bound to have misread the number, and instead of the juicy wee minx with the peachy bottom, you'll end up having to entertain the twitchy lad with BO in the pink spandex leotard, who comes every month and sits in the corner talking to himself
Play safe 
Edited Tue 27 Jan 04, 3:36 AM by CruelLadyScorpio
