Is it wrong for a Dom to worship his sub? (33)

Well..... it depends on who's in charge of the scene, I suppose. If you're indulging your fetish by petting your girl's feet and legs then you're really just pleasing yourself it seems. If she happens to enjoy it, so much the better. If it's an expectation of hers and she feels that she has the right to demand it, then I'd say that the power is moving in the wrong direction if it's D/s.

There's a huge difference in her putting on her stockings and high heels and coming for you on her own as opposed to doing as she is told and donning those articles for your sole personal pleasure. I'd just examine the power dynamic carefully and make certain you are still in charge. (if that's where you wish to be)

SinPar

-- The weak are the most treacherous of us all. They come to the strong and drain them. They are bottomless. They are insatiable. They are always parched and always bitter. They are everyone's concern, and like vampires they suck our life's blood. (Bette Davis)

i think the essence of a dom/sub relationship is that a dom takes his pleasure how he wishes, and the sub takes her pleasure from pleasing the dom. if he doesn't enjoy her, she is not fulfilling her purpose, so provided you are doing it because it pleases you then her pleasure should be from your pleasure - if that's not too circuitous and makes sense! it's very healthy for a dom to enjoy his sub - indeed essential - and for a sub to know you enjoy her legs and stockings and to dress and present herself for you to touch and enjoy is a development in your relationship. have fun and enjoy!

Of course we do.

...Since I found my sub side, I have had two Doms with a definite foot/shoe fetish, and I love the fact I can give them pleasure by wearing heels and stockings. So I guess it's a mutual thing, and it doesn't make them any less dominant.

"Being natural is simply a pose." (Oscar Wilde)

Depends on the relationship, I suppose.

I'd much rather have a relationship with someone who admires me at least in some way - otherwise I can't be valued very highly.

Some people seem to get off on being told they're worthless shits, though.

How can it be wrong?

As I understood the only thing that was 'wrong' is a D/s relationship was things that weren't 'safe sane or consentual'

Now I'm new here, first post to a forum in fact, and I may have got the wrong end of the proverbial stick. But am I right in saying that there isn't a 'right' or 'wrong' way of doing BDSM? - As long as it's safe sane and consentual?

Isn't it really just a matter of finding a way of worshiping a sub whilst still being in control of the situation. I could speculate on ways. But what do I know I'm only a newbie..

estella wrote: I am still in the process of showing him that I don't need to be wrapped up in cottonwool

And I'm still going to try that one on you for real, you know...

Personally, I adore Estella. The fact that she's a wonderful, beautiful and magnificently sexy sub is all a bonus. I'd still love her if she weren't into BDSM at all.

I find BDSM to be absolutely wonderous in variety. You can have a lifelong relationship with someone and never have two sexual encounters the same. (Which makes me lament the poor souls who trudge through vanilla missionary sex like it was a chore) And I think there are a million different ways to view a BDSM relationship. You can have a BDSM relationship where it would never be appropriate for a master to idolise his sub, but equally, you can have one where it fits perfectly. As with so many things about relationships, there is no right and wrong answer. It all depends on the situation and the way you both feel about things.

I certainly wouldn't say it's wrong to do something because it's not seen as 'normal' compared to other BDSM relationships. The one thing that should matter is that you both get what you want from it. I can only see it really being an issue if your sub is uncomfortable with being treated like that, and then you'd have to address that as an issue and deal with it accordingly.