Total Failure (8)

What is understood need not be discussed.

I did give up, i walked away, i failed constantly. But there is something inside of me that keeps me trying, the need to please, the need to give, the need to be honest with myself. I know how it feels for your body to be crying out for submission, my body is. It will be a long long time before i can fulfill that need.

The one piece of advice that i would give you would be communication with your partner, i forgot communication and lost for it.

However low you feel today hun, tomorrow will be better, i promise.

Take care

Kitty xxxxxxxxx

Edited 20 May 05, 7:01 PM by Scorpion59

What is understood need not be discussed.

Feeling too wobbly to get back on the horse right now, hopefully soon.

melody xxxx

"I'm a classy honey kissy huggy lovey dovey ghetto princess"

Maybe nothing at all.

Are you? Have you really hit rock bottom? If you have, why did you write this? This shows that you still have hope.

Not surprisingly.

So, you're judging the whole of Doms/Dommes/Masters/Mistresses (delete as appropriate) in the world based on this one? Is that fair to the rest of us?

Maybe... just maybe... s/he WANTS you to fail. After all, s/he's in charge... s/he sets the goals.. if you're constantly failing them, then s/he's either setting them too high, or expecting you to fail. Maybe both.

Ever thought WHY it might be GOOD to fail? Here's some of my thoughts:

1. you could stop taking on his/her responsibilities.. you're (just) the sub/slave (delete as appropriate)... if it's not working out right, it's not YOUR problem... nor is it up to you to fix it.

2. who says the relationship is failing? you? who the heck are you to decide that? why are you making any decisions at all?

3. s/he might want you to define yourself differently. you seem to be measuring your relationship against some other standard than s/he does... why? why must s/he perform to that standard? because YOU say so?

PERHAPS... if it's really not working for you, it's because the other person isn't meeting your most crucial needs in your relationship.. and maybe that's more than just having you as their sub/slave. if you've told him/her about it & it still doesn't change, maybe the best thing to question is not yourself, but your relationship... if it's not working, it's not working. doesn't mean you're a bad slave (necessarily), may just mean that you want to be a different kind of slave/sub than s/he wants you to be.

then you've got to ask yourself... can you live with the kind of slave that s/he wants you to be? if you can.. then you've got to change to meet his/her needs... whatever that requires. if you can't, or you can't change, then get the fuck out.. and learn from the experience... and find someone who gives you whatever it is you need.

you'll be better at finding it the next time around because you know the warning signs... whatever it was that s/he did to convince you that s/he was the right person in the first place... before you dedicated yourself.

whatever you decide, I'd also suggest that you not look at it as a failure... you learned some stuff about yourself.. your most basic needs that have to be met for you to have a relationship that you can be happy in.

-SL

Hi ya

It could be lors of reasons right now your stressed with exmas on the way. That might be why you couldnt submit to A as much as you wanted.

Dont feel disheartend we all have down and bad times.

Take care

(((HUGS)))

Very sorry to see you are so down. I believe a Dom should never take more than half of what a sub would be prepared to give, and a sub should be prepared only to give half of what she dreams of. A little hunger, little mystery, can give suprising results.

friend

Nil illegitimus carborundum