Posted by Smartarse
on Tue 5 Apr 05, 5:19 PM to Smartarse's blog.
To practice BDSM I believe you need the following qualities:
1) Respect for others.
2) Understanding of others.
3) The maturity to remain in control of your emotions and maintain the above two qualities whatever situation occurs.
My question is this:
Should people who cannot show these qualities be considered unsuitable as partners in a BDSM relationship?
| 5 Apr 05, 5:24 PM corriander_THM UK(FY), 9 yrs |
I think we all make mistakes now and again, surely. Every sub is disobedient occassionaly. Every Dom/me will lose patience every now and again. Personally I would not be happy if it is a regular occurance though. Maintaining respect should be an absolute even if you occasionally seem disrespectful of others, hopefully it is just a slip. To have no respect for others permanently is not acceptable. I think the two others qualities are similar in that way. Forgive where possible, but how many mistakes can you take before you take a risk with your safety? "Massive poverty and obscene inequality are such terrible scourges of our times... that they have to rank alongside slavery and apartheid as social evils" (Nelson Mandela, 2005)
www.makepovertyhistory.org | |
| 5 Apr 05, 5:47 PM kikkiMM UK, 9 yrs |
In the words of MM...as I've just asked him kikki xx kikki{MM} "I finally got it all together...then I forgot where I put it!" | |
| 5 Apr 05, 7:13 PM lucky_1 7 yrs |
Oh I love this Alex!
Well, good people of IC have we all been showing these characteristics this last few weeks? Think about it! Lucky All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. Lucky Edited 5 Apr 05, 7:14 PM by lucky_1 | |
| 5 Apr 05, 7:41 PM PaganDiver UK, 8 yrs |
Lol. I rather expect he has, Lucky. Bloody mayhem here at the moment! Think I want to plead the 5th amendment on 'respect for others' though. | |
| 5 Apr 05, 7:44 PM tryst UK, 8 yrs |
am afraid respect is earned, not given willy nilly... | |
| 5 Apr 05, 7:46 PM PaganDiver UK, 8 yrs |
My point exactly Tryst. | |
| 5 Apr 05, 8:14 PM lucky_1 7 yrs |
I know Alex had thought about it PaganDiver! It's everyone else I meant!
Except you of course Lucky All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. Lucky | |
| 5 Apr 05, 9:43 PM Big_Friendly_Giant UK(RM), 9 yrs |
Yes. TonyBFG. | |
| 6 Apr 05, 9:52 AM Smartarse UK(CM), 7 yrs |
Thanks for your answers everyone. When phrasing the question I was thinking in a wide context but was forced to consider my own behaviour and experiences. I think the answer to my question is yes, but with each new potential partner we get a fresh chance to show that we have the third quality of maturity. alex_10m |
..."Yes, particularly if they are Dom/me. If a Dom/me cannot display these qualities, how on earth can they expect their sub/slave partner to do so?"
Personally I think that it's a requirement of maintaining a good relationship in any "lifestyle".
Damn good question alex 
