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| angellover |
on Thu 5 Jan 12, 12:45 PM to angellover's blog.
Ok this post is going to be me rambling on, it's not a moan and groan, so please feel free to say as you please and ramble with me.
So how can one find others on the same levels...
You see I am finding it difficult to find people on the same level as me or them that want to learn and progress to a different level, ones that have imagations and willing to try new things. I am not knocking anyones level, as we all start where we want to start, we all travel as we want to travel, so please don't take any of this personally.
Is it only me that gets bored with the memos and convos' that just want to know what I have liked, into, whats my kinks as many call it.
So what about asking me "What are the new things do you want to try?" what about ???? what about other stuff etc etc to push ones mind and imagations.
Then theres the ones that say they are into mind fucking yet talking with them you can clearly see they have no imagations what soever, so thats pointless too. Yet the mind is the biggest tool of all but again even that many don't really get.
Yes I am a sub with my own equipment because I love being me as I do worry about cross contaminations but I lov what I want and that a Master/Dom can run with me and have fun.... but many see it and get scared for some reasons.
However the same way I want to learn and go forward I feel a Master/Dom should want to, as it can be a never ending road.
No, I am not into bullies or them after a fuck as payback because they have just caned some arse. If that's your thing I wish you well, as again we all have differnt levels and needs, it's just not mine.
Yes I want to please but to be pleased also in return too, learning what pleases each other means you use it more and give more the more one wants the more one gives. It's a two way street so good comunications vital.
I want to do the vanilla things and have D/s all intwinded in all we do, the 'yes Sir's' the look of OMG I know I'm in trouble when W/we get in and I want all the funny things to... as many forget to have laughter.
I love my buttons pressed and taken away and go deeper.... it's not about money, presents it's about two becoming one. The Bounce together in play and vanilla life emmmm lovely but not many seem to do or even know how to handle it. Well maybe it's just me thinking this... who knows!!
Yes for them into CP the canning, paddles spanking its fun but for me it's nothing really intresting... It to me is part but not the be all and had all.
I don't want them that need to prove themselfs to others or them that can not control themselves and yet expect to conrol a sub. Them that get angry and shout quickly and think the shoutings going to solve it for them.
I don't want a limit on my submission but it will not be given until things and the relationship is built up. So them that feel your their sub because you have met them on a first meeting or started talking to them are not at the level for me.
I want and know nothing is more lovely than passion in intercourse, be it lust, gaggling, longing or love making. Sex is still a sensual part of me, so them that say sex is not part of BDSM, yes maybe in a play setting, or with agreed terms of slaves and subs I agree but I am saying it's important to me. Not the be all and had all but important none the less.
I want to learn and grow and this to me should be a two way street as we all can learn everyday.
Do you find it's hard to get a little bit of a level?
Edited Thu 5 Jan 12, 1:34 PM by angellover
| 5 Jan 12, 1:38 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs |
Silly me, I forgot to tick the boxes for reply.... Sorry  yes I know about human nature to believe the personality comes first then our limits and boundaries after.... But what do you think of levels and how you you deal with them?
Come on, lets have a debate
The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind Edited 5 Jan 12, 1:45 PM by angellover | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 2:26 PM pixie15_CJ_s UK(EX), 7 yrs  |
i understand what your saying and i think the issue is your wanting it all to fast ... getting to know someone may take months ... learning what makes them tick ... may take longer ... you seem to want it all today .. try taking things slower. yes you have some kit yourself but it might not be the kit ..but the kit owner ... seeing a room full of stuff might put a lot off ... kind of topping from the bottom with your own kit or it could make them think its play and only play you want we have over the years bought kit together ... things we wanted to use ...not the " i have this this this and this ... come use it " we do our play but its only part of who we are .. there are other things that make us a couple .. stressing on one part wont help
chaos mayhem and desaster......my work here is done | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 2:26 PM NimueBanditQueen UK(MK), 2 yrs |
Levels. Levels within levels within levels. Aye, there's the rub. Or maybe I should say - a rub? Trying to get my head around this, do you mean that essentially you are/have been finding that many are just after too-easy sex, and or the simple application of implements but you want someone to take you beyond that to where you haven't, as yet, been? Or am I, as I often do, missing the point? Edited 5 Jan 12, 2:28 PM by NimueBanditQueen | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 2:44 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs |
It can take years even. I don't expect things to happen over night.
If they had taken the time to talk to me they would know I do not do casual play as thats not what its all about for me, but I can see where your coming from also.
I expect to do this also and the things I have, have been used on me in the past... its not just brought for the heck of it but as for shared pleasure.
I was talking of the part if the dilemma of finding a match within this realm, and not just someone who wants to play with you. its nice to see folk thats found that match too. The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind Edited 5 Jan 12, 3:03 PM by angellover | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 2:59 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs |
I am talking of the part if the dilemma of finding a match within this realm, and not just someone who wants to play with you. So, no, I am not saying I am finding many just after to easy sex at all.
The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 3:06 PM IrrepressibleSoul  UK(OX), 24 mths |
Could you go and pro-actively contact someone who appeals to you? And then get your questions in first....which is fairly likely to get them to ask the same of you in return..... Tathagata Buddha, the Father Buddha said "with our thoughts, we make the world"......well I bet he never had to build a flippin' shed! | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 3:17 PM pixie15_CJ_s UK(EX), 7 yrs |
If they had taken the time to talk to me they would know I do not do casual play as thats not what its all about for me, but I can see where your coming from also. but on here people dont ..they may read your old blogs .. but usualy they dont I was talking of the part if the dilemma of finding a match within this realm, and not just someone who wants to play with you. its nice to see folk thats found that match too. [/quote] ok you may find this odd but ..why are you looking " in this realm" ?.. this is only part of what makes you ..you ... we didnt meet through BDSM .. most who we know who have stayed together didnt either .. they met the person they liked then added the kink ... if it is THE one then they will enjoy all aspects of you not just the BDSM side .
chaos mayhem and desaster......my work here is done | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 3:25 PM Souci_X UK(BA), 5 yrs |
I totally see what you are saying, I was fairly lucky as I progressed through all this, I started with someone who was very big on teaching, on manipulation and mental control, perfect, then I got to progress to the physical stuff with someone with more experience, then I got to someone who had tried so much and who got me to do the same, doing new things that I had never thought of. It was a brilliant learning curve and then it made it so easy for me when I met my current partner, I wasn't play questing I was looking for someone who made me happy now, probably in a vanilla sense, I know what I like in a BDSM sense and to be honest when both parties are willing it is very easy to get that stuff going, if you connect emotionally and physically and intellectually thats the battle. Knowing what you want is the key here really, finding someone who fits what you need is easier when you can articulate that to yourself. I don't actually see the problem with your having your own kit and indeed it seems to me that is not your primary focus anyway, I don't know why someone would be intimidated by that, but I guess if they are then its not the person for you. Good Luck. | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 3:31 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs |
I totally agree but I was talking in general about levels but many know there has to be a connection there in the first place.
The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind | |||||
| 5 Jan 12, 3:49 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs |
I wanted to see if folk looked for the level that their heads at or not, I have asked myself if I am talking with someone who only want to spank me with their hands and paddle on my butt, if there could be a way to build on this as no way would it suit my needs or level within my head. Yes nice as part off... but I'd get bored, so could we discuss and ove forward.... Many people are different, have differnet needs, pleaures, desirers, dreams. Some with whom you would trust far more than others, some you trust really quickly and others not at all. So why not look at levels.
The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind |
