A question for the group (82)

Well, you have asked for people thoughts on sissification, and in the spirit of honesty and balance, I will give my forthright opinions on sissification.

I hope you are ready for this and can take it because I never sissify men and find it completely alien to me as a dominant woman to do so.

It is widely practiced in femdom but a few of us are not interested for the following reasons.

All female dominants want to control their subs so it is just an issue of how we control them and why.

I enjoy the social company of those who cross dress for their pleasure or transgendered people who feel naturally comfortable and right in female attire. I want to make that clear from the start but I don't play with feminisation or 'forced feminisation' or sissification because it just doesn't fit into my mindset of how I want male subs to think, feel or act around me.

I like men to be men when they serve me. I want them to have to accept their submissiveness naked and unadorned, so they see themselves and know themselves to be submissive men, their real and true state. If I wanted to play with someone dressing or acting feminine, I would play with a woman. Masculinity, naked and controlled is very sexy and very beautiful.

I like men to accept and be proud of their submissiveness as a male, not be hidden in feminine attire which helps them to feel submissive. Why do they need female panties or more to feel subby?

I don't connect female clothing or anything feminine with submission. Why would I? I am a woman and I am strong and dominant so to me the feminine is a powerful thing. The last thing I would do is turn a sub into a faux woman and then tell him because of that he is weak and pathetic. I think that feel as though I would be indulging in very mixed up thinking and a bit of self hatred.

I am proud of being a strong woman and want my male subs to be proud to be serving me as a submissive male.

I don't see how dressing up a sub in the feminine attire of the sex he allegedly worships and adores is humiliating anyway.

I see no correlation between the penis size of a man and his worth. It just doesn't enter my thinking. Maybe some subs love to be humiliated by women who use their small(er) penis size as reason to belittle him. I would just feel like a mean shit and as a small penis does not actually affect how good a sub he can be, I have no reason to connect small penis with sissification and with being sub.

I connect the penchant for sissification with a 'worthless worm' ideology which again I do not subscribe to at all.

I treat sub men as individuals and so judge who I will enjoy to have and play with on how useful and worthwhile they are to me as a sub. Useful to me means doing things, working hard, accepting my rules and ways but does not mean needing or even wanting humiliation, degradation or 'dressing up'.

So, my view is that sissification is undertaken by many dominant women but I have no real understanding of why or what they get out of it. Men can be controlled without that and it is considerably less hard work. I do not say they shouldn't have their kinks, definitely YKIOK is true but I do not empathise with the philosophy or get the logic.

I am ultimately in many ways a more selfish dominant as I see a sub as being in my life to please and serve me and he has to do that on my terms, regardless of whether he would enjoy being humiliated and belittled. I need them to serve from a position of submissive strength, pride and good sense of self esteem. Anything which chips away at that makes them less likely to be able to give me what I need.

I suspect my view will not be a popular one but it is my honest opinion honed over fifteen years on the scene.

Dominant partner in an FLR with @paulss

I like strong, overtly masculine men who give their submissive side willingly without having to be forced.

Although I have to admit, there is a website that sells women's underwear (not the horrid frilly stuff) cut for men, and I was suprise that I found the idea of a muscled guy in traditionally women's fabrics quite a turn on. However he wasn't pretending to be a women, he was strong and masculine, he just happened to be wearing lingere.

I'd be interested to know what it does to the mans mind?

What I would really love is to hear from male subs who both see sissification as an important part of their submission and why AND also the kind of subs I like who do not see it as exciting or desirable. I would love to hear a mix of male subs views.

I do think it can matter what lead the female dominant gives on the subject, as some men have been honest and told me that they went along with what other dominant women wanted and submitted to sissification but if I didn't get excited by it, they were perfectly happy that it wasn't going to form part of our dynamic. Those subs are fine with me but I couldn't abandon my own desires and feelings and just 'service' a sub with his fantasy ideal of submission.

Dominant partner in an FLR with @paulss

Precisely this! Eloquently said.

I do understand how being "forced" to do something that you have been raised to NOT do...or to be "permitted" to do something that you want to do - plays into the "out-of-control" fantasy many men have. Most men I've spoken to about this agree that feminine dress is not submissive, but being either forced or permitted (depending on how far along the guy is in realizing this is HIS fantasy and that he really likes it) is what makes them excited.

No matter what, if the woman doesn't WANT to have her sub dress in a particular style, it's not submissive behavior to do so. So for me (and the ladies above), if you did dress in ladies clothing, it would not be a submissive act - but rather a gift from us to you...since we know you enjoy it so much.

However, if a woman sees making a guy dress in women's clothing as a humiliating act for him - and she ENJOYS and DESIRES to humiliate him in this way, then whether he likes it or not, doing so would be a devoted act of submission.

Find out what YOUR UNIQUE partner finds to be desirable and the DO THAT to the best of your ability. That will bring you the most satisfaction from your power exchange.

- Rika

I have not been (nor do I want to be) feminised or wear lingerie, however as a means of humiliation it would be very effective on me. It would upset me far more than a painful beating ever could. I am not sure how I would react at the time. I suspect I would retreat as much as the Domme would allow me but I, in submissive mode, would acquiesce to get it over with. Might do lasting damage to the relationship though!

S

Having said that, I do still love my boy to be pretty much manly. Putting him in sexy "female" clothing doesn't make him girlish, nor is my aim to sissify or humiliate. I do like the visual appeal.

I'm sorry, but this sounds more like a male fantasy to me, to be laughed at and humiliated for a small penis. Unless the Domme has a cuckold to satisfy herself with, or would abstain from intercourse altogether, she'd pretty much laugh at something she'd want the next day inside of her. That's a hard concept to grasp and certainly wouldn't float my boat. But maybe we get other views on this as well.