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| PhoenixAmber |
on Tue 13 Dec 11, 11:07 PM to PhoenixAmber's blog.
I have re written the first part of this three times as I lost the original so I'll set the scene then post what I have. Recently I had my first experience of playing with needles as the person actually using them and not the person on the receiving end. We all had a great time and it was a great experience all around. Not a little bit weird which it could have been both within friends and 'switching' in front of two guys who are used to seeing me from the other side…one of which it was his girl (no pressure then) LOL
So imagine all the safety talks and information is done and it's all on me…..
The interesting thing was the start, I cleaned her down with surgical spirit, the smell is like nothing else and is the clear signal to the senses that play is about to begin. Before I opened the bottle I reminded myself of this and to control my own reaction to the smell. So there I was wafting it about and even placing it close to her nose, letting her breathe it in, starting the mental journey for her. So how about me, I didn't smell it, it could have been water, I have no idea how but my focus completely blocked my sense of smell for that time and I was unaffected by it. I must remember that, I wonder if it works on pain too?!
So I sat there with needle in hand, steadying the mental nerves, focussing on the task in hand. I took a few silent slow breaths and my focus narrowed to that small patch of skin pursed between my fingers waiting to be broken. A tiny push, a sharp intake of breath that wasn't mine and a rush of adrenalin, the push continued, the needle moving like a knife through butter until it was pushing the skin from the inside outwards, a moments pause, steady hands, even pressure, the needle teasing before it broke the barrier. I think both the girl and me gave a sign in unison as the skin gave way, a release we shared at the completion of that first penetration. A few words were exchanged, still a teaching thing but I could feel the inner calm, the deep focus creeping in. I don't remember the conversation much, a task to repeat the same but deeper. So I continued, placing the next needle against the skin, measuring and working with it until I stepped out of the bubble and realised that it was exactly the same but deeper. Something akin to smug washed over me, impressed with my own achievement, checking the girl, who was fine and still in the conversation that was beyond my ears.
Needle after needle, slow, controlled, paced and stunning, fascinating and intoxicating. Somewhere I know that the girl has relaxed and is, at least partly, sinking into the experience. I am told to put two in quickly one after another which I do feeling the bursts of adrenalin each time come thick and fast. I take a breath breathing in the beauty of what I am doing and feeling. My muse still relaxed, interested. A change of gauge and her chatter to me and the others slips away a little, relaxed, enjoying and allowing the bursts of her own endorphins to sail through her. I feel protective of this beautiful creature allowing me to enjoy her, trusting me to look after her even through her pain. I sat back and enjoyed that moment running my fingers over the needles in her arm, her skin is reacting, growing slightly puffy and red at the foreign body within.
We discussed how it feels to her and I apply the usual corset effect ribbon on it, a nice girly touch in pretty pink and the crowning glory of a beautiful thing. Like leather and lace the needles and ribbon contrast and illuminate each other. I put put needles in various places including one on her shoulder as I know that she reacts there, I figured her neck would be cruel.
I was lost in what I was doing with no concept of time and had totally blocked out the others in the room, there was simply her & her reactions, me & and mine and the needles. That suddenly felt rude, and so I as much as I could have continued for a long time I asked if anyone wanted to add anything at this halfway point or I would begin the removal of the needles.
Nobody did and so the removal began. I have no idea what order the needles came out, it was a damn good idea to have a counting system to make sure I had them all as I had no recollection of how many I had used. As I say I have no idea what order I took them out and when I took the first out I was little disappointed, not a huge reaction. The next one however changed that, It bled….it is truly impossible to understate the power of blood the those who feel it and probably just as difficult to make someone who doesn't see it. That moment where someone is bleeding, willingly, for you is utterly stunning. (words fail me) Apart form age old romance that is what makes vampire movies (the good ones) so enduring and captivating. As the needles came out I felt myself loose some of the tension, like I allowed a deep exhale every time.
Then all of a sudden they were all out and there was some blood catching going on from a dripping trail. I watched, I checked her and I sat back to make sure that 'I'm fine' was really fine (she is a girl after all). I cleared away and watched her being cared for. Slightly drifting somewhere, nowhere. That didn't last long and the most overwhelming feeling was one of “I did that”, not power, that's the obvious thought, but pride, a true stick your chest out and swagger, I feel like the muts nuts type 'big I am' moment, done with a girly flare, I beamed light from within. I just kept repeating 'I did that' in my head. Once I calmed down a touch (after a while) I had a moment of 'little old me……did that' here is something pure in holding another in your awareness, knowing their reactions and yet focussing on the skill of what you are doing, then looking at their reaction and registering your own all in a heartbeat before it starts again.
At no point did I feel 'Dom' or 'Powerful' but man did I appreciate the control as it was given, and taken in waves between us! Funny how I felt the most protective I have ever felt towards her when I was hurting her he most! I think perhaps I realised without knowing it at that point that I have no idea what 'Dom' or S&M top 'powerful' feels like, and I didn't care, I had my perfect feeling and whatever I was, it worked for me. It certainly wasn't 'service' LOL
What an intricate web we weave……..and boy I needed a cigarette after that, like a post sex smoke it was almost that feel; A sense of well being and a feeling of 'I did good'. I will remember it fondly, grin wildly and dig into that inner calm for a very long time.
(and can you believe that I wrote most of that listening to The Overtones….how wrong is that!!)
Edited Tue 13 Dec 11, 11:08 PM by PhoenixAmber
| 14 Dec 11, 1:17 PM vixylix 2 yrs |
That sounds absolutely beautiful. It's not something I have ever thought of trying, needles. I natually shy away from something that might hurt  However, you make the experience sound wonderful...maybe I might just let myself be led into this one...someday. Thank you for sharing. |
