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| DanesWood |
No it's fucking not.
Listening to the news they announced the death and apparent suicide of Gary Speed. It seems this successful manager of the Welsh team chose to hang himself at the age of 42.
What demons drove him to take this decision, who knows. Perhaps his personal life was not as successful as his work one.
Perhaps there is no reason other than something that existed purely in his mind.
Over the years I've known many who've chosen this exit route, I can't say I'll ever understand any of their reasons.
This story probably resonates with me because of his age and the method of his demise as it's so close to my beloved Sophia.
There are others on here who I know have also been affected by the suicide of loved ones as I have. I think because of the connection we build with our partners in a D/s relationship is generally more intense than a vanilla one, so perhaps we feel their loss more.
I don't think it's anything we ever really get over. Time doesn't heal, that's a lie. What we do is find a way to deal with it and to carry on, each in our own unique way.
A persons pain does not die with them, it lives on in those they left behind. Mostly it's kept locked away, but sometimes (like when I heard the news of Gary Speed), it's suddenly as raw and fresh as though it were yesterday.
Few are thinking rationally when they end their lives, but for anyone who reads this and reaches such a desperate point at any time in the future.........please try and reach out to someone, anyone.
Talk, cry, rant and rave, whatever it takes to get through it, because it will pass. Only death is forever.
| 27 Nov 11, 2:43 PM jenevieve UK(CH), 4 yrs |
Yes having lost friends and colleagues to this it is those left behind who have to pick up the pieces and deal with the issues. Like Daneswood said if at all possible talk to someone,online, in person, the samaritans, anyone before its too late. No matter how you try you just can't fix stupid! | |
| 27 Nov 11, 3:35 PM angellover UK(CM), 3 yrs  |
I could not agree more... reach out in any way you can, as life ends are forever sadly.
The highest fences we have to climb, are those we have built within our mind | |
| 27 Nov 11, 4:00 PM Subfemmepet UK(NE), 6 yrs |
wise words...as ever The road, may be bumpy , but it still leads us to our destination. Love conquers all, and makes the heart come alive | |
| 27 Nov 11, 4:16 PM sathya UK(S), 18 mths |
True, it's terrible news and one can only wonder what was in his head and his heart before he took the final step. It has brought back memories, and my thoughts and feelings are with those who have also lost loved ones sk x The violets explode inside me when I meet your eyes Then I'm spinning and I'm diving Like a cloud of starlings - Elbow | |
| 27 Nov 11, 6:07 PM Jezzebelle UK, 10 yrs |
Hope this isn't in bad taste, I got a surprise last week when I received a pm on Facebook from an old schoolfriend, surprise because I was told 25 years or so ago that she had committed suicide aged 17. http://www.flickr.com/photos/jezzebelle/ | |
| 27 Nov 11, 6:38 PM Degenerate  UK(M), 5 yrs   |
Yes they are wise words dear lady. It is hard enough to lose someone we love, without knowing it is tiredness of or being lost in this world, or pain, which drove them away from it. It is often said of those who have left, that if they had truly known how many others cared for them - whether it seemed that way or not - that, perhaps, they would have stayed. It's another reminder not to waste a day with those we care for and to say what we feel, whenever we get the chance. Especially for those who we know sometimes struggle or feel like life itself is a torture at times. De Vote to repeal the kinky porn ban! http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/282427/ | |
| 27 Nov 11, 6:47 PM DanesWood UK(OL), 4 yrs |
Indeed De and one thing I am glad about is nothing ever went unsaid between us. We never know when we may see someone for the last time, if we don't tell them how we feel we may not get that chance again. However you lose someone it's still tragic and it hurts, but when it appears unnecessary then you have to ask why. "The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign. Mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing." | |
| 27 Nov 11, 8:19 PM secretsmile_101 UK(M), 18 mths     |
Yes so true, and I had a similar experience today when I heard about Gary Speed too. Like a stab in the chest along with a flood of memories about what happened. Horrible things I haven't remembered for a long time. Plus feeling sad that another person felt that was the only way out. Feeling sad for those left behind trying to understand why. I agree with you too. It's never something you get over, but thankfully it is something that gets easier to live with. It's been many years since my mum killed herself and it terrifies me to think I've got another 50 or 60 years of this pain to live through. It sounds well cheesy but I find it comforting to think that while we live with the pain our loved ones have left us, we live with the love and the memory of their kind, caring and generous personalities they left us with too. It's not much, but it's a little something we can use to help us slowly re-build our lives. I'm sorry to read that you have lost loved ones. I wish you all the best, especially as Christmas approaches. Regards. Hannah Edited 27 Nov 11, 8:22 PM by secretsmile_101 | |
| 27 Nov 11, 9:41 PM cheeky_pixie UK(LU), 12 yrs |
Whole heartedly agree and it is the family and loved ones who are left to try and come to terms with the senslessness of it and even guilt that they didn't see it or couldn't stop it from happening. But it is possible to come back from that desperate point and for life to get better. It can be hard to reach out for the help whether from family, friends or professionals but it does work and things can get better. I am very grateful that someone who was my best friend and housemate at the time did find the strength to reach out when her very serious attempt didn't work as she had planned. The help and support she received allowed her to come back from her dark place and find lightness in life again. | |
| 27 Nov 11, 10:03 PM Sadistia UK(NG), 10 yrs |
Thinking of you . Sx |
