This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.
| Sat 5 Nov 11, 10:35 PM Trusttolove UK(LS), 13 mths   |
not to derail the asexuality thread, but i was really interested in this quote. i always think that my response to domination isn't a sexual thing in itself. i just feel like i get peace and satisfaction from obedience and pleasing. but Sir says i make control into a sexual thing. and sometimes its like a split where i am responding sexually but i kind of dont feel like it comes from me. am i just naive or in denial? is it because i'm new? do other people feel like this. is control sexual?
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| 5 Nov 11, 11:08 PM misunderstoodslave UK(OL), 2 yrs |
Won't be the same for everyone, but I experience his control as completely and utterly sexual, constantly. It's been a revelation and I adore it. The simplest task comes with an accompanying sexual frisson. It also makes me feel very satisfied and fulfilled and happy to be controlled, to feel and experience the reality of that control, but even that has a certain sexual edge, I suspect. It transcends sex, is more than sex, in its totality - but then let's not forget that sex is really very important.
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| 5 Nov 11, 11:18 PM londonplaything UK(SW), 5 yrs |
isn't everything sexual? lp ................bitie bitie................... | |
| 5 Nov 11, 11:40 PM You_May_Kiss_My_Ring UK(PA), 11 mths |
As I tried, in my half-asleep fashion, to say in the original thread, for me sexual feelings come from control, and almost exclusively from that. In my younger days, whenever I was left in charge at work I'd feel a definite sexual charge, and there's a definite link there I think. "That hat makes you look like you own slaves! ... only you would go to a Goth club wearing a beige hat, and dressed in purple!" | |
| 5 Nov 11, 11:58 PM SpikyBear UK(LS), 7 mths |
If you're wearing sex-tinted spectacles then yes! | |
| 6 Nov 11, 8:15 AM vixylix 2 yrs |
YES YES YES!!! (for me anyway)! Edited to add, only you know if something feels sexual or not to you and if you enjoy your submission without the sexual undertone and relish simply the control then it's not a problem. People experience things in different ways depending on their experiences, etc. Don't worry about it...just enjoy it the way YOU enjoy it. Edited 6 Nov 11, 8:20 AM by vixylix | |
| 6 Nov 11, 8:27 AM SlutBoy2000 UK(AL), 7 mths |
Is control sexual? Not necessarily. But it can be. When it is, if it is done right, it can be mind blowing for both parties. If it's done wrong, well, we only have to look at the TV News to see what can happen if it's done wrong! | |
| 6 Nov 11, 8:43 AM Belasarius UK(M), 8 yrs      |
It feels it, for me. When she is doing something for me, even if I am miles away and can't see it, it gives me a tingly feeling in the gonads. My goal - to save women from nature (Dior) | |
| 6 Nov 11, 8:44 AM Ms_Valentine UK, 9 yrs |
Control in a D/s relation can be as sexual or not as you want it to be. I am not turned on physically by a lot of the control I exert over @paulss because it is just everyday stuff for us. we live 24/7 and neither of us want or could cope with sexual arousal all day every day. However, when we focus on something and really live in that moment, revelling in the conscious kinkiness of it, then it can become heightened and then we can find it arousing. Obviously intimate play is arousing and as I am always in control in our relationship, it is always sexual. Mistress of @paulss My PD blog at http://mistress-keene.blogspot.com/ http://twitter.com/#!/Mistress_Keene | |
| 6 Nov 11, 11:47 AM poutanaki UK(M), 10 yrs |
This. Control makes me feel settled, happy etc, but I also eroticise it an inordinate amount. You are so pretty when you're on your knees. Disinfected, eager to please. | |
| 6 Nov 11, 11:56 AM Ama_Sidero UK(GU), 7 yrs      |
I think there is an underlying sexuality to it all. I used to think it could be totally non-sexual, then I thought - How many people would serve someone they felt no attraction to whatsoever? How many people would want someone to serve or to serve someone who they actually found repulsive? Then I decided that although sexuality may not be included, nor desired, nor consciously thought about, but there might need to be a small spark of chemistry at least. There are, no doubt, people who live for pure service and who would serve anyone. I suppose the test could be...would someone go and serve an anonymous person who they never saw? I don't think many would - oh, but on the other hand, the fantasies could be ever-so-grand then, couldn't they! LOL @Play_Space - Next party is 23 October, Sunday, 5 to Midnight! |
