O_and_P's profile . O_and_P's homepage . O_and_P group posts
 |
| secretsmile_101 |
For many months now I have been thinking about a way to get an O&P event going for everyone and anyone interested in O&P. I have several reasons for wanting to do so, but I'm not very good at explaining my thoughts so please bear with me!
1 - Previous O&P Opens have been heaviliy dominated by "couples" and poly groups who are already in O&P relationships. I would like to stress that I don't in any way have any beef with this! The opens have been a great way for people to share their O&P experiences with others, and I feel it's been really beneficial for people to do so too. However, if you are single or have little to no experience with O&P, it can feel quite awkward and difficult to sit through the event. You can feel like you can't say anything or don't have anything to contribute to the discussion. I think a lot of singles and/or curious folk have been once and never returned, and I'd like to change that.
2 - A lot of myths and beliefs seem to have evolved around O&P. For example, that only uber 24/7 masters and slaves can have an O&P relationship, or that it's only for people whose interests fall in the more hardcore areas of BDSM (e.g. ultraviolence). Some people might feel that there is one set way of doing O&P, and there are right and wrong ways to do it. But it's not ticking off points on a checklist. I believe that you don't have to follow every single point of the manifesto to have an O&P relationship. A lot of it is what works for you, what you make it and how you interpret it. I'd hope to break down some of these misconceptions about O&P with future events and encourage people who may have been put off by them in the past to come along.
3 - Many people would like another O&P event and keep asking when the next one is, but some people who are interested in running one feel they are not able to. This might be because they feel they don't know that much about O&P or feel that they lack experience or for whatever other reasons. I'm one of those people, but if we all work together, we can help people like myself get an event going. : )
So the dream is to create a space where anyone and everyone interested in O&P can gather and have fun, learn from each other and feel included. My questions are:
* Is anyone interested in attending this kind of thing?
* What kind of event format do you think would work for this?
* If you are interested in coming, what kind of event format would you like to attend? Eg. similar to a munch, a discussion, a mixture of the two...a Christmas party!?
One idea I had was to use Greydancer's fish bowl session. (mia wrote about it here - > http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/316228/ ) For example, people could make groups based on those who are interested in the ownership side of things and those who are interested in the possession, and we could ask each other questions for some of the event.
Anyway, your ideas and input please! I want to try and get an event up by the end of the year! Thank you. : )
Hannah
x
Edited Mon 31 Oct 11, 9:55 PM by secretsmile_101
| 31 Oct 11, 10:10 PM mia  UK(M), 4 yrs        |
I think something that can appeal to those in relationships and to those not in relationships would be great, as long as it doesn't just become like any other munch - as great as munches are - there are a lot already in Manchester. I like the idea of a mixture of socialising/munchlike and discussion time. Perhaps 2/3 hours of both with the socialising bit first, so people feel more confident to speak their mind when it comes to the discussion. Also, a more structured start to discussions might allow more people to feel like they can contribute - either like the fishbowl thing - or something i've seen been done in meetings and heard about in American MaST meetings where each person has a set time (say 1 minute) to answer a specific question, then go round the table with everyone getting one minute too. I'm just thinking outloud (well, typing) so if it's a shit idea, then no worries. I had wanted to do an O&P social type thing myself, but with one thing and another, it's just something i'm too busy to organise. No organiser should feel they have to have a degree in the Manifesto, nor own a herd of slaves - or even be a D-type. The beauty of O&P is that it encompasses D/s, M/s and O&P themes and i think as long as people are genuine and happy to listen to others, then that's the most important thing. x Quick Lynn, run, they're sex people | ||
| 3 Nov 11, 1:16 PM HalloweenWhite UK(TF), 7 yrs   |
I like the idea of a group set up specifically for both people -in- a O and P relationship and people -not- in one because it'd be more "user friendly" for the people not in this kind of relationship-they'd all be at the same starting point so it'd be a level playing field so to speak, to express ideas,worries, etc. Having said that and speaking as a rank amateur, I like the way the group is set up right now because I find it helpful to listen to people who have much more experience than Me talk about how they got to the point they're at now, i.e in a settled O and P relationship, and to have them talk about the problems they had to overcome to get there, as well as how they deal with stuff that comes up all the time. Even if, like Me, you say almost nothing because everyone else has more experience, I still think this kind of set up is a good one because you can take on board what people are saying then form your own opinions and go from there; agreeing or disagreeing as and when. Sadder still to watch it die than never to have have known it. | ||
| 5 Nov 11, 7:08 PM Taintedinnocence UK(S), 6 yrs |
I agree a change would be good. I think that there are a lot of regulars, which is good, but new opinions and thoughts make things more interesting. I think it might be nice to have social activities - e.g. a trip to a museum, and then maybe dinner after? So that people can talk about O&p but that isn't *all*? To hang out with likeminded people without having to talk about it all the time?! That being said, I do find all the conversations really interesting, just feeling a bit burnt out I guess. | ||
| 6 Nov 11, 12:06 PM secretsmile_101 UK(M), 18 mths   |
Thanks for the replies - will take comments on board and have a think! x | ||
| 10 Nov 11, 8:42 PM Gigantor UK, 7 mths |
Sounds like a great idea. There are clear aspects of O&P in D/s and M/s relationships. In fact without the O&P element (in varying degrees), the dynamic cant work properly, so anyone in that type of dynamic should be welcome. I propose a general get together of varying groups, levels and experiences. People would find their own levels within these groups. Everyone has something to learn from everyone
Master Dom Gigantor | ||
| 16 Nov 11, 1:51 PM totallycoverme UK(M), 4 yrs |
I totally agree with all the points you make  I wouldn't know my arse from my elbow in terms of hiring a space and actually running an event but I would be confident in chairing (think that's the word for it?) a discussion. I looooove the discussion group format but some variety would be awesome too. I can't think of exactly what to suggest but I'm on a wavelength where I'll have a think about it *zones into a train of thought* It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice | ||
| 16 Nov 11, 1:52 PM totallycoverme UK(M), 4 yrs |
love this! if it was more local, i would suggest a day out to the london dungeon...I've always wanted to go there and it would be awesome to go with a load of O and P dudes It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice | ||
| 17 Nov 11, 9:09 PM Belasarius UK(M), 8 yrs    |
Time to resurrect the culture club: http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/p/The_Culture_C... It went quite well for a time. My goal - to save women from nature (Dior) | ||
| 3 Jan 12, 8:30 AM HiGuysItsMe UK(S), 16 mths |
I totally agree with the suggestions put forward by mia and taintedinnocense; and totallycoverme, I was about to suggest a visit to the dungeon! Mind, if its like the York one, it isn't, to my mind, really relevant to O & P, honestly! How about a nice art gallery and enjoy ourselves! Both London and Manchester have excellent ones. Not strictly relevant either I agree; but just a suggestion. Kind of relaxing no-topic time to share with like minded people before getting down and dirty with the heavy stuff! 'Ow'.
'Shut up'.
'Yes Mistress. Ow. What was that one for?' |
