Ejaculation and Submissiveness (64)

What about Dommes? Do you feel less or more dominant after orgasm?

Edited Tue 11 Oct 11, 3:41 PM by Natural_Born_Sub

Rosannas Pet

I've seen this suggestion before, both from submissive men and dominant women. I won't speculate on the majority, but it doesn't accord with my experience. I think my submissive feelings can be enhanced if I ejaculate by permission; I have a strong sense of gratitude.

"Wisdom begins in wonder” (Socrates)
"Imagination is more important than knowledge" (Albert Einstein)
Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/226772/

Edited 11 Oct 11, 9:31 AM by wonderer

Women are far more complicated than men. We're less ruled by our libido.

"If no sexual offence is being committed it seems very odd indeed that there should be an offence for having an image of something which was not an offence," Lord Wallace of Tankerness
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I think it depends on the sub's motivation. If his submission is based on sex then he'll feel less submissive because he's been satisfied and his submission needs time to build up again.

Some masos can only cope with the pain when they are aroused. I've seen many a maso's pain tolerance disappear to nothing after ejaculation.

Service orientated subs however should always feel submissive whether they have have ejaculated or not. If you have ejaculated with her permission how can you possibly feel un-submissive, knowing that she calls the shots and you rely on her good will to ejaculate again?

Dont say I never speak to you, only 5 minutes ago I told you to shut up. !
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Glad you made that simple for us.

I suppose it depends on how high their sex drive is. In my experience being kept in chastity dramatically increases it so they never lose interest.

I allow D to climax quite regularly and he's still gagging for it.

I do agree though that chastity is an excellent thing and all couple should at least try it. I disagree with keeping them in chastity in a state of frustration for ever and ever, as far as I see it chastity is about control, not prevention.

D is in chastity to prevent him from having control over his own penis, he can't enjoy it without my presence in the way I prescribe whether that is full sex or controlled masturbation. It doesn't mean he gets less sex, just more quality...which in turn ensures better quality for me too.

A randy but biddable man in my bed is bliss

Now that is certainly my personal experience (though I'm more sub than masochist).

Again my experience. I can be grateful for having been allowed just as I can be grateful to have been denied or frustrated.

But this is quite different to my personal experience. If I'm in complete chastity with no touching at all, my sex drive ebbs away and the process becomes rather counter-productive. (Little basis for submission or frustration if I lose the appetite). A mixture of chastity and release and various kinds of deliberate frustration is more effective for me, and I believe (from earlier threads) there are others like me in this respect.

"Wisdom begins in wonder” (Socrates)
"Imagination is more important than knowledge" (Albert Einstein)
Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/226772/

Edited 11 Oct 11, 10:26 AM by wonderer

Does it make me feel less submissive, the answer to that is absolutely not. Of course, prior to ejaculation, one has a heightened sexual tension, and afterwards I tend to feel relaxed, warm and happy (and have even been known to fall asleep, imagine that!).

I suppose that this means that there are activities that feel more "exciting" before than they do afterwards, but for me it doesn't alter the sense of submissiveness.

For me, the ideal scene denies ejaculation or is about repeated ejaculation so that it is either irrelevant or it is the main focus of the interaction.

The idea of some very clear form of expression of submission (above is mentioned caning) after ejaculation is an interesting one. This would be one way to focus the mind and overcome the post-ejaculation change of mood.

That is my sub @paulss would describe it. Gratitude. He feels so happy I have allowed him that pleasure and he knows it happens only when I wish and by definition when I am feeling particularly pleased with him. Being a quite sexually charged man, he finds it no easy task being controlled sexually by me and the orgasms, especially when allowed full and highly pleasurable ones leave him feeling if anything more submissive for a while. All kind of puppy-eyed and sweet. Ahhh!

Edited to add: Long term chastity in my experience can make a man lose his sex drive if he is locked up and never touched or teased to keep him sexually frustrated. Without stimulation, it can seem to be men just give up hope somehow and sex becomes less important.

If you view chastity as I do, and as Anna_List says, that it is about keeping his cock for the Domme, all for me...yum yum! I am sexually very excited by my submissive partner and so I lock and unlock him regularly for my pleasure. It is for control, but not to prevent of any disobedient behaviour, just control over his most sensitive parts so he feels that sense of difference between his life prior to our 24/7 D/s relationship and now. Chastity and complete sexual control do work perfectly to mark a change from one lifestyle and a permanent move to another much more fulfilling kind.

A Fine Norfolk Domme. Mistress of @paulss My PD blog at http://mistress-keene.blogspot.com/

Edited 11 Oct 11, 11:01 AM by Ms_Valentine