Narcissist or Dominant (52)

I guess it is possible that there could be some sort of statistical link between the traits that people commonly consider to indicate a dominant personality, and those commonly thought to show excessive self-importance or a sense of entitlement. Narcissism I'm less convinced about.

But really, each individual should be taken and dealt with as an individual, and I've met and heard of quite a few men who identified as submissive, but who were self-important, controlling, passive-aggressive, and very selfish indeed.

We're none of us perfect, but I have a feeling that the D/s dynamic makes the submissive a little more vulnerable in some ways, so you have to be very careful about whom you let into your head and your heart.

But it is a tricky issue- in life, you don't get to pick a personality profile and then order it up from Fate- to some extent, you have to take what life offers.

And in fact, I think some submissives actually want their partners to be both dominant and self-important. For example, those with a humiliation fetish maybe? Some people like it when their own happiness and well being are ignored by the dominant (the submissive's wish is to have things that way), so in many cases the 'kneel worm' approach suits both parties, perhaps?

As a submissive, I want to be in a relationship with someone who is absolutely convinced that they must have things the way they want them. I WANT someone who is confident almost to the point of self importance, but not quite. I want someone who needs things done their way, but who is not quite selfish enough to ignore my happiness. I want someone who wants to take control of me, but who is not a deranged and abusive control freak (but hey, some men do want that, right?)

So it seems to me that when we go looking for people with characteristics that the rest of society would regard as pretty extreme, we can't then be surprised when some of those people come with other traits that we aren't so keen on. Hopefully the narcissism that you don't like (and me neither) will be exactly what another submissive person is looking for.

One odd thing though- the dominant women I've met in person and spoken to have mostly been really, really nice people, as well as being dominant. Some of the online brigade do seem a slightly different kettle of fish, but then that could just be down to the way people come across via this largely anonymous medium- misundertandings are rife, and rudeness is so temptingly easy to indulge in at times, for most of us.

Edited 24 Sep 11, 1:08 PM by JustTony

wanting all the bowing and scraping etc

I do not correctly recall the words but it was definatly within the context of Gods Nassism

and many of these type's i believe set them selve's up on there own pedistal without giveing a secounds thought to yes they look good,

but THEIR PRATS the ruddy lot of em,,

a sawmill dosent have a patch of the amount of dust accumillated between thier ears and the mills floors

Please excuse crap spelling cause i,m rubbish

To the world, You are one person. But to one person, you might be the world.

I know what you mean as I found the same thing with one or two so called Masters. It was uncanny how their behaviour matched up to NPD. Needless to say it didnt last long and wasnt very pleasant an experience for me. They were really quite unbalanced and now what I would call a proper Dom, more using the title as an excuse to behave so badly.

A narcissist will always happily have a conversation about what they want

easy to spot

Senno Ekto Gamat

Requires excessive admiration

Has a very strong sense of entitlement, e.g., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment

That's me to a T. You could add

I think I am extremely interesting

I cant understand people who aren't exactly like me and, from the web -

Feelings of nervousness, emptiness, or irritation when not at the center of attention. Overly concerned with surface indicators of social importance Unable to be objective or feel empathy when angry Unlimited and unrealistic sense of specialness. Often responds to perceived hurts by defensive regression to a state of hostile, archaic grandiosity accompanied by an elaborate show of strength, toughness, or independence.

My top isn't the least little bit narcisstic, perish the thought! It wouldn't do to have two loonies in the house.

Pour encourager les autres

I like that

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." Anais Nin
Crawley Munch
DV8 XS Kent

i think we should now all talk about me,,

please kneel at the keyboard before answering,, after doing the requisate rekquisit recquizzit ,,,, Just pry that my spelling one day improves first !!! bugger ! damn an blast !

Please excuse crap spelling cause i,m rubbish

I've met subs like this, or at least.

Real TWUE subs who are propper slaves who can abandon their ordinary lives to be looked after by a Domme 24/7 for a year. Of course the subs don't see it like that but isn't that also the point.

Isn't this exactly the same in a diffrent idioum ? I think so

"Yeah I like Kinky stuff,dirty dark pervy stuff,weird sex.... An' Yerself ?"
Award Winning Switch.

Seconded!!!!

www.costablancabdsm.com