This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.
| Mon 22 Aug 11, 5:35 AM AngelFingers1 UK(CH), 2 yrs   |
Thinking about the issues raised in the "iv had memo" thread, this question is for male subs only.... Have any of you genuinely had BAD experiences, as in seriously scarey and not in a nice way, or actually come to non-bdsm-harm directly as a result of meeting a Femme Domme from IC? Have you agreed to meet and then found out the Femme Domme was that 18 stone trucker from Hull! Any lucky escapes? Any incidents where for example you reported it (or maybe should have) to the police? Any situations that made you alter your strategy for meeting ppl in real life? I dont mean that you just didnt like her or each other, I mean something much more unpleasant. Gosh I sound like a troll! (and this isnt an invitation to any trolls either)But I'm not trolling, I'm interested because I know how I feel as a woman meeting guys for the first time (and have my own safety precautions in place) but hadnt really considered that HE might be taking precautions in case I am the axe-murderer!! Well, I KNOW I'm only sadistic in a consensual way.. and assume everyone else can tell!! Stranger danger is obviously real but how many IC members (male or identifying as male) have actually experienced it?
Oh Yes....and the sun will set for YOU. Edited Mon 22 Aug 11, 5:37 AM by AngelFingers1 | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 6:51 AM male2shemaid UK(SA), 4 yrs |
Several years ago I entered into a long online conversation - memos, emails and instant messenger - with a couple from IC, both claiming to be dominant. The conversation moved to the telephone and, over several weeks, we talked at length on the telephone and continued the online conversation. Eventually we agreed to meet for a coffee and a chat in a town near their home. They sounded sane, intelligent and 'normal'. Two days prior to the arranged meeting I got a phone-call out of the blue from the female - the supposed 'femdom' - hurling abuse at me from the moment I answered the phone. I was accused of being sick, of being a pervert, of being a queer - all these words were hurled at me - and was told that the world would be a better place without people like me in it. The female was shouting at me with her husband encouraging her in the background. Once I had got over the shock my first instinct was to put the phone down, but instead I decided to listen for several minutes just to make sure that I was not imaginging it. It was surreal. I had done absolutely nothing to invite this abuse. It was totally unwarranted and unwelcome. After what seemed like a few minutes I hung up. I was shocked but very relieved that I had found this out prior to meeting them in the flesh. In my view, they were completely deranged and potentially dangerous. I had kept several IC friends aware of my ongoing conversations with this couple so, like myself, all were shocked to learn of the phone call. Everyone said that it was a blessing in disguise. This was several years ago and, last time I checked about 8 or 9 months ago, the couple still had a not very active profile on here. I have not checked for some time so have no idea whether they still do or not. There are lots of screwed up people in the world. | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 8:00 AM Twistee UK(BA), 3 yrs   |
I've never had a bad experience, but then I'm very careful. In a world such as ours it's very easy to act impulsively and leap before looking, but there's a lot to be said for having a healthy sense of caution about any new contacts you make. ~Twistee~ Everything is better with a twist | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 2:14 PM the_7th_soul IT, 9 mths |
i thought that thread was a joke... | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 2:48 PM Made_in_Italy UK, 2 yrs |
why, you think men cannot be assaulted? I have met male subs who had been emotionally scarred by psycos calling themselves dommes. there have been instances of safewording not respected, physical injuries (leading to hospitalization), emotional blackmail, and so on.
| |||
| 22 Aug 11, 3:01 PM the_7th_soul IT, 9 mths |
wow... it's probably because i am to much self confident. never thought such things may happen since they are rules against it. But if it did, why such Mistresses have not been marked as "dangerous" ? | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 3:30 PM stripped_warrior UK(SE), 3 yrs |
Without going down the malesub's being told to "man up" in that situation route, it can occur behind closed doors, or in a public environment where the Domme is known and the behaviour is overlooked because people don't want to see it. Reality is a perception, normality an opinion. | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 4:00 PM sassyslut US, 21 mths |
sorry but just because you are self condfident does nto mean you could be abused by somebody it has nothng to do with your confidence, it has to do with crazy people who pretend to be something and turn out to be something else, personally and i knwo i am a woman i have never been int hat possition, but i know of other men who actuallyhave even been raped by women YES YOU CAN BE RAPED AS A MAN, so i never take any of this as a joke although i feel a bit of a troll by reading this tread without having anything to say really
Ladran Sancho!! seņal de que avanzamos. | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 4:09 PM deaglan UK(N), 2 yrs |
no one on here but i got scared (untill very recently) of crops and being open-legged around dommes due to two domme's i met at pedistal (nothing against that club i have had some great moments there i love it these are my only two bad experiances...) anyways first one i met talked to a domme and she asked if i would like some action... I being brand new and very excited said yes thankfully we had a safeword no warm up with a crop is a definate hard limit for me especially when its used as hard as possible on the first swing! and as for the second there was no conversation or anything i was near the trample area (not yet led down) and a possibly drunk domme decided my nuts needed a good kick... again still not into full kicks to the groin XD anyways thats all the rest of my year in london has been great:P dex | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 4:39 PM prettyPETunia UK(WS), 4 yrs |
Wish I hadnt read this thread now!! Aint met anybody yet off here and on the verge of meeting someone either tomorrow or next weekend. Might cancel now cus im bricking it!!!!!
Prob wont tho Catch me if you can | |||
| 22 Aug 11, 4:53 PM freequench UK, 5 yrs |
All i would add is that any sub (male or female)is inevitably vulnerable (and so is a Dom/me with a malign sub!)and before meeting a new Dom/me, and putting my hands in lockable cuffs i have as much info as i can on the Dom/me, a reference (probably meaningless but i feel better) and have communicated to a reliable 3rd party the Dom/me's name, phone number and meeting place as well as establishing an agreed time (say after 2 hours) for a safety phone call. You may yet find me one day, swinging with a bag over my head but at least i should be still identifiable and worth returning to my next of kin. For Fun's sake, subs, value yourselves and PLAY SAFE |
