This post is on the Other BDSM web board.
| Tue 2 Aug 11, 11:41 AM Souci_X UK(BA), 5 yrs   |
I hear this a lot and kinda agree but I was wondering how many people did meet their partners on here. I think the 'don't use it as a dating site' is a very British way of saying don't get your hopes up just to be disapointed. Sometimes though it is nice to know that it can and does happen. | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 11:48 AM TheFalconer UK(S), 6 yrs |
I met my wife here. There's been a few threads over the years about people who've met via IC, there's quite a few success stories. I think it's certainly true that IC is not only a dating site (I wouldn't still be here if it was), but that doesn't mean that it's not a dating site at all. To my mind IC does four things - it's a community forum, an events calendar, a blogging portal, and a dating site. I do despair sometimes of the constant refrain you see of "if you want to meet people, go to a munch". At the end of the day, different approaches will work for different people. IC works pretty well for people looking for an internet dating site who want to only meet other kinky people. "Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace." - Oscar Wilde | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:04 PM SirOpenSource UK(E), 6 yrs    |
I think the comment about going to a munch is purely because it is a very safe environment for introductions especially for newbies. Some will always, however have different approaches. SOS The Titter group - for when you don't feel too serious. | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:07 PM DominaFire UK(RG), 3 yrs |
I met my fella on here two years ago, we now live together and I have never been happier. I understand and respect the go to a munch comments but I knew the munch thing was never for me. I met quite a few people on here but have never used it as a dating site per se. I'm gonna close my eyes and count to 10 and when I open them again, everything will make sense to me then | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:11 PM MarkMyWord 5 yrs |
I have met three people on this site that I had resonable length relationships with. Not sure what everyone considers 'reasonable length' but they were for me. However my longest D/s relationshipsdo tend to stem from initial vanilla friendships . I have always wondered about this. Do I attract dormant submissives or do I corrupt nice ordinary girls! No idea but it has always facinated me. | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:11 PM mia  UK(M), 4 yrs      |
I couldn't agree more with this. I've met people on here, with varying degrees of success and certainly wouldn't knock it for its potential 'dating site' qualities - as it clearly does work like that for some (me included in the past). Also, the fact it acts as a social calandar means that many people meet at munches or other events because they've seen them advertised/promoted here. That's how i met my master - by seeing a munch advertised on here. x
Quick Lynn, run, they're sex people | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:15 PM Mentor_2012 UK(PO), 4 yrs  |
I have met several very nice people, in real life, as a result of IC. In some of these real-life interactions I have "clicked well" and in others I have not. Real-life interactions have ranged from 10 minutes ( Not my best! ) to 18 months plus ( my best, to date)! IC has been somewhat a dating site for me, especially as I am only looking for Kinky people, but it is also very much more. For me it is a very valued resource.
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| 2 Aug 11, 12:19 PM Lalita UK(BS), 6 yrs |
It does serve the function of a dating site (hence personal ads), but it's also a community forum. I think "IC is not a dating site" tends to come up when people post personal ads on the forums. Anybody can be fabulous. You got a hump on your back? Put some glitter on it and have a party. | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:19 PM Muzzlehatch UK(TN), 7 yrs |
Munches aren't primarily for dating either. Thats not to say it doesn't happen. They are a good place to meet other local kinksters, and if you arrange to meet there, you 'should' be safe. Well you are at mine, but I can't vouch for others. Both IC and Fetlife have provided me with play partners. I insist on meeting whoever it is before any play takes place, and the obvious place is my munch, occasionally at a club. Is IC a dating site? For many no, for myself sometimes. Owner of The Croppery Dungeon and Breakfast. Organises The St Leonards munch. Edited 2 Aug 11, 12:20 PM by Muzzlehatch | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:23 PM gagmequick UK(OX), 2 yrs |
Yeah, when I joined up it was for Dating. I joined BDSMSingles a few years ago, which is mostly a Dating Site, (I seem to remember there is brief mentions of Munches etc on there, but I've not looked for ages and ages.) (BDSMSingles are still sending me "Women Matched Perfectly for You", and I think, "Oh yeah, she's great, just my cup of tea! Oh wait, she's in bleeding Wisconsin! 4,000 miles away! Just what I'm looking for, then!) ) Anyway, that is what I was using IC for initially, and even managed to get a Date out of it! However, as the months have gone by, I've found myself getting more and more involved in the Threads, Posting away, and feel more a part of a Community now. I've even made a few really good friends on here. It is such a marvelous site! It can be what you need it to be. There are many people on here, who have partner/subs/slaves who are not seeking, but are still very much involved. IC is a Community within a Community. Some people find it difficult to meet like-minded people. I am Disabled, and while I have been to the Oxford Munch a few times, it is very hard for me, being both a little deaf and shy/ For the same reason I have not been able to go to the LAM. So IC has given me a way to feel connected. Isolation from our peers is a terrible burden, and IC has really helped me relieve it. So, yes, it is a Dating Site, but soooo much more than that too! Horray fr IC! | ||
| 2 Aug 11, 12:26 PM SirOpenSource UK(E), 6 yrs |
In fact the original idea of putting personal ads on forum sites is to discourage doing so on boards. It works well when the ads get a good deal of mentioning in discussions on said boards. SOS The Titter group - for when you don't feel too serious. |
