Grimly's profile . Grimly's homepage
 |
| Grimly |
on Thu 20 Jan 05, 6:09 PM to Grimly's blog.
I have been reading and hearing a lot about campaigns to make BDSM and Ds more acceptable to society. SM pride, Revise F65 and others.
I'm not sure I want society to accept or approve of me and what I do, in fact I quite like the fact that they don't!!! I don't see the point of adopting an alternative lifestyle and then moaning about the fact that the rest of society doesn't get the point. Society makes the rules dictates what's the norm and legislates accordingly. If we want to operate outside the norm, dare to be different, live out our fantasies and express our sexuality in a way others cant or don't want to understand, that's our choice. If there is a danger in doing that then that just adds to the spice. 
I wonder how many of us have taken a perverse pleasure out of revelling what we are into to someone we think will be shocked by it, I know I have, and I have also had the disappointment of finding out that they are not that bothered about it. I sometimes wonder whether all the media hype and titillation has numbed people to the point where most people already say “so what” 
I think twenty years ago when things were much more underground and dare I say risky than it is today, it was a lot more fun!!
I find the idea that we as a group are a community a bit of a joke. At best we are a bunch of people drawn together by a common interest, yes I have some very good friends on the scene, but there are too many differences and too many egos for it ever to be a community in the true sense of the word. Those that want wider recognition from the world and have their own agenda and want to spend their time and energy campaigning for BDSM rights or recognition or changes in the law have nothing in common with me. I just want to have fun and enjoy myself. Forbidden fruit tastes much more sweet than the bland mass produced pumped up titillation the majority of the population enjoy, we don't call it vanilla for nothing. Cheers Grimly
Edited Thu 20 Jan 05, 6:20 PM by Grimly
| 20 Jan 05, 6:25 PM Jezzebelle UK, 10 yrs |
Show me a real community which doesn't have people with 'too many differences and too many egos' and I'll take six of the best I guess wanting not to be understood by the non BDSM community is fine until you happen to be the one who is 'outed', especially if you work in what is considered a 'sensitive area' such as teaching. I think under those circumstances you might be gratefull for a little more understanding from the non BDSM community and the laws of the land. Jezzebelle Before any word leaves your mouth it must be approved by the three gatekeepers. The first will ask: "Is it true?" The second will ask: "Is it necessary?" The third will ask: "Is it kind?" Anon Edited 20 Jan 05, 6:26 PM by Jezzebelle | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 6:29 PM Grimly UK(IV), 10 yrs |
"I guess wanting not to be understood by the non BDSM community is fine until you happen to be the one who 'outed'," A couple of years ago I made it into every newspaper in Scotland for running a dungon for hire, been there done that Cheers Grimly Edited 20 Jan 05, 6:32 PM by Grimly | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 6:31 PM Jezzebelle UK, 10 yrs |
Before any word leaves your mouth it must be approved by the three gatekeepers. The first will ask: "Is it true?" The second will ask: "Is it necessary?" The third will ask: "Is it kind?" Anon | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 6:50 PM chapa UK, 8 yrs |
[i] Curiouser and curiouser!! [/i] | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 6:58 PM Grimly UK(IV), 10 yrs |
Maybe we get so hung up on our paranoia we don't see that is not such a big deal these days
| ||
| 20 Jan 05, 7:29 PM Backdooruk UK(BA), 12 yrs |
I really don't think you've thought this through much.
| ||
| 20 Jan 05, 7:31 PM lili UK, 12 yrs |
Unfortunately people are still loosing their children, their jobs and their freedom for doing SM and it's still a "legitimate" reason that the police don't pursue a prosecution in the case of rape where the victim is "out" as a masochist. lili | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 8:00 PM Grimly UK(IV), 10 yrs |
I have given this a lot of thought. Maybe we are just seeing it from different angles and different experiences. The point is that if we want to be seen by the great unwashed then we have to take the possibility that things may get out of hand. I'm not sure anything will ever change and by drawing more attention to the scene it could make things worse. At the end of the day no matter what campaigning is done it cant change the fact that we are trying to make people accept a minority sexual kink as something normal | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 8:55 PM alexandraa UK(NW), 8 yrs |
Problem is of course its not legal and discrimination on the grounds of sexuality specifically excludes S&M activities under current (recently updated) employment law. You only need to look at how long it took for homsexuality to start becoming acceptable in every day life and protected under employment law to realise acceptance of BDSM has a very long way to go. regards alexandra | ||
| 20 Jan 05, 10:22 PM Backdooruk UK(BA), 12 yrs |
In my Friends case her husband lawyers are claiming that because she is into BDSM she is unsafe to look after her own children. Whether she succeeds or not depends on convincing the court that this is simply prejudice. Her case has also had a knock on effect. A guy she knows somewhat who has only visited her house once (to fix a computer) has been suspended from his job as a teacher and is being investigated by the CPS. None of this strikes me as something we should be tolerating as inevitable.
|
.