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| Puddin_Von_Puss |
on Thu 10 Feb 11, 1:02 PM to Puddin_Von_Puss's blog.
This has happened a few times now. I find someone interesting- in what ever way- and start chatting to them. Sometimes get as far as arranging to meet up or something. Then...boom! they either get cold feet, delete their profile completely, decide to give vanilla a go or become a Tibetan Monk or something. I'm really starting to take it personally now!!
| 10 Feb 11, 1:08 PM jenevieve UK(CH), 4 yrs |
you aren't alone in this. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:13 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
It just makes me so sad. The people who pester and annoy you never just leave the site- only the interesting ones! Everything will be OK in the end. If it's not OK, it's not the end. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:20 PM frederick_hende 20 mths |
Hi, from the point of view of a male submissive, there is a moment when you realise that fantasy is about to become reality and that can scare you rigid.
If they have fantasised too much and thought of the reality too little they have a moment of clarity and fear, an understanding of what will be expected of them should they be lucky enough to go forward into a D/s relationship, which can make them run a mile. In other words, its their problem not yours and bluntly no loss to you. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:23 PM male2shemaid UK(SA), 4 yrs |
I am talking generally now but I think that many Femdoms often do not realise how nerve-racking it can be, and what a big step it is, to submit to a Woman. I think this causes many good, decent and wonderful men to step back, run away, hide, do a 101 other things to sabotage a potential relationship, etc. In simple terms - they panic. Some Femdoms do not understand this due to inexperience. Others do not understand it, and will never understand it, despite decades in the Scene and so-called years of experience. In this respect, the Femdoms too sabotage potentially wonderful relationships. Much is written on here about male subs concentrating on what they want but I believe, often in conversation and negotiation, Femdoms often focus on what they want. They both ignore and forget the importance of being supportive and understanding of the anxiety and inner conflict that many Men hoping to become male subs feel. I think this is why, often at the last hurdle, so many would be male subs withdraw, disappear or, as I said, sabotage what could be a wonderful lifetime ahead. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:35 PM bohnanza UK(FK), 12 yrs |
It happens to all orientations and genders. People's desires run ahead of their capabilities. The same thing happens in all sorts of activities. Rohypnol means never having to say "Would you like another coffee?". | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:42 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
Hmm, don't think that's the case with the people I'm talking about, but thanks anyway. Everything will be OK in the end. If it's not OK, it's not the end. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:45 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
Thanks for that, it makes sense actually. It is a loss if I was interested in them personally, although no doubt a sign of things to come. Onwards and upwards though. Everything will be OK in the end. If it's not OK, it's not the end. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:50 PM male2shemaid UK(SA), 4 yrs |
I thought you, as a Dom in your profile, were talking about male subs? I didn't realise you were talking about Doms. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:53 PM Puddin_Von_Puss UK(WA), 6 yrs |
I'm talking about male subs. Everything will be OK in the end. If it's not OK, it's not the end. | ||
| 10 Feb 11, 1:57 PM Richtea UK(BN), 2 yrs  |
There's no excuse for this behaviour. I can understand that perhaps they're nervous about meeting,(I'm always as nervous as a kitten I don't think it's anything to do with being submissive or dominant, I'm sure that everyone, no matter what their 'role', is a little nervous on the first meet, it's no excuse for letting people down. I may be in the gutter, but I am looking at the bars. |
) But if you're going to chicken out every time, then don't be leading people on before disappointing them. 