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Whats the worst first contact memo you've had? (95)

This post is on the Other BDSM web board.

31 Jan 11, 9:37 PM
SweetLucita
UK(BL), 17 mths

Just had a lovely one calling me an ignorant tw@t as I didn't reply to his first memo within 20mins, which did actually interest me!! So he stuffed it up!!

31 Jan 11, 9:37 PM
Robert16
UK(OX), 2 yrs

Aha.........I did,.........it only took a year!!

DarkEnchantment wrote:
I'm a guy; we don't get first contact memo's!!

Never drive faster than your angels can fly

31 Jan 11, 9:38 PM
just_saffron
2 yrs

missPowers wrote:
lmao S_C I was going to ask if I'd missed a meeting

Without fail I get the following memo, once a month...

Subject: Free chocolate for life

Hello missPowers

If you can take heavy pain, and have a third class degree in arc welding from Aberystwyth University, I'd like to talk to you.

Regards Tony

Now given that Tony has been polite, I've responded similarly...politely. Until the third one arrived...

My reply: this is the third time you've sent this to me and both earlier attempts were rejected politely...today I'm just going to tell you to fuck off!

I wonder who else young Tony is trolling...bless him

Once a month? Tony messaged me five times in three days.

Same message. Exactly.

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Over to the dark side....

1 Feb 11, 9:02 AM
Scorpionic
UK(BN), 6 yrs

Over the years - there have been far too many ignorant/poorly written/"I haven't read your profile but I'm chancing my arm anyway" type memos to remember... A few of the most common are:

"Hi, can we chat?" (from an empty profile with no other information) = fail!

Any memo that includes the words "my wife" or "I'm married" = fail! (Even bigger fail if they add that they are also looking for a relationship - WTF?!)

Any memo written in text speak = fail!

Any one line memo of wanky assumption = fail!

"Know thyself!"

2 Feb 11, 1:12 AM
Miss_Namio
UK(DT), 5 yrs

gentlemusings wrote:
Whats the worst first contact memo you've had?

I had a generic 'Plzzz mistres can i b ur slave 4ever' type memo here on IC - what made it the worst ever was that the sad boy had sent it to multiple recipients not realising that we could all see each other's names copied in!

Oopsydaisy

Then there were the ones about the 2L coke bottle and/or cucumber from the same person.

Then there was the one accusing me of being a man and stealing my wife's photos to put online - despite, at that point, having a real life network of 40+

Not so little Miss Facetious....

Edited 2 Feb 11, 1:13 AM by Miss_Namio