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What do you look for in a Dom or sub? (62)

This post is on the Other BDSM web board.

6 Jan 11, 9:43 PM
Miss_OL
UK(YO), 6 yrs

Twistee wrote:

Dark_Cherry wrote:
Someone that recognises I'm a person first above all else.

Yup, that pretty much covers it for me too.

~Twistee~

Yes, that's a biggy.

I think chemistry covers a lot of it really, plus I find shared kink interests a good place to start when seeking a sub.

Fly it all out like an eagle in a sunbeam.

6 Jan 11, 9:43 PM
MisterBear
UK(WA), 8 yrs

Down to earth, compatible, right body language, looks good to me, nice personality, a good amount of intelligence, fun, dirty minded and kinky, likes anal and also hates onions.

True and genuine are only concepts and as such are meaningless. Try thinking in terms of compatibility instead.

6 Jan 11, 9:45 PM
Reversed
23 mths

AshUK wrote:

red_mist wrote:

Reversed wrote:

AshUK wrote:
What do I look for in a sub ?

.... my penis ?

Would a magnifying glass help you find it.....?

damn you beat me to it.

Smashes the magnifying glass on the table and stabs you both through the eye with a shard of glass. That's what you get for being cheeky.

And thanks, but I rarely need help finding my penis. It's usually in the same place each time I look.

So I'm guessing 'good sense of humour' is not high on your ideal subby list

6 Jan 11, 9:48 PM
relaxed1
UK(BR), 6 yrs

It's impossible to define, or perhaps I just hate definitions (the principle of "to define me is to limit me"), or maybe it's that so many of the factors that I look for in a sub are so difficult to define;

Take 2. Poor eyesight (white stick and Labrador optional), no sense of smell, skin like rhino hide, fragrant;

Take 3. Intelligent, tolerant, open-minded, funny, self-deprecating, cute (which is my definition of cute - so nobody will ever understand it), interesting, compatible kinks, fearless.

Take your pick, but probably version 3 is closest to the mark. (Or revert to the beginning, dependant upon the phas of the moon.)

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up at the stars." - Oscar Wilde
"You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing." - Sir Arnold Bax

6 Jan 11, 10:08 PM
teach_me
UK(OL), 6 yrs

male is a good start ... and a pulse helps too

Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should get used to it
if you have a problem with something i've said or done ........ tuff get over it

6 Jan 11, 10:13 PM
Dollface
UK, 6 yrs

Being one step ahead of me at all times, and being able to pick me up on it when I try (in vain) to outsmart them.

"When you're going through hell, keep going."
- Winston Churchill.

6 Jan 11, 10:13 PM
othyim
NL, 3 yrs

Honestly? Honesty.

Power is about what you can control. Freedom is about what you can unleash. (Harriet Rubin)

6 Jan 11, 10:18 PM
relaxed1
UK(BR), 6 yrs

teach_me wrote:
and a pulse helps too

Bugger, I forgot that one. Maybe that's where I've been going wrong.

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up at the stars." - Oscar Wilde
"You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing." - Sir Arnold Bax

6 Jan 11, 10:19 PM
HalloweenWhite
UK(TF), 7 yrs

I like women who are a good laugh, have a brain, comfortable in their own skin, call a spade a spade and have their own sense of style.

Oh, and smell nice is good too.

6 Jan 11, 10:24 PM
Greebo
UK(RH), 12 yrs

Essentials: Sense of humour Intelligent Not bigoted Kinky (to 'nilla folks eyes anyway)

Actually when I think about it, that pretty much sums it up. There's not even a 'nice to have' list. I'm more interested in what's between the ears than anything else. Though nibbleable boobs, spankable arse and a neck sensitive to both stroking and biting is a real plus.

"Greebo could, in fact, commit sexual harassment simply by sitting very quietly in the next room." "Maskerade", Sir Terry Pratchett

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