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| Conan_The_Librarian |
on Fri 31 Dec 10, 1:22 PM to Conan_The_Librarian's blog.
I had a poo yesterday that puzzled and challenged me tremendously.
The movement itself was easy and straightforward, once the bomb-bay doors were open, gravity dealt with things with the speed and efficiency it normally reserves for a malfunctioning aeroplane. There was no need for unseemly shoving or straining on my part and my buttocks and crevice region were unsullied by splash-back.
Normally dear Reader, the story would end there, leaving your hero with a feeling of quiet satisfaction at a job well and truly done.
But not yesterday.
Upon examining ground zero my previously unfurrowed brow became decidedly furrowed as I contemplated the unholy carnage below.
What rudely confronted me and challenged my sensibilities was a sight more fitting for a farmyard than a domestic convenience, nothing less than a large dollop of something that bore all the characteristics of a pile of manure.
And here is the question that has been puzzling me so this last day gone, resulting in sleepless nights and harsh words to the help: Can a fellow have a poo, the dimensions of which legitimately qualify it for the description of 'manure'?
If pictorial assistance of the said affront to the dignity of God and the sanity of man is required to help formulate an opinion, one can be supplied upon request as I took several on my mobile telephone thing.
The pictures of the affront will be supplied to help the interested form an opinion on the question and not for perverts to wank over.
If it is wanking material you want I will supply a picture of my cock, you can have either 'cock undecorated', 'cock with snarling face' or 'cock with bobbly eyes stuck on the end'.
| 31 Dec 10, 4:06 PM FluffySub UK(NN), 6 yrs      |
Manure is something that is used to improve the quality of soil. It's not just poo, it can be things like bedding such as straw or sawdust. So unless you intend to dig your poo into your flowerbeds you'll never qualify, however impressive it may have been  | |
| 31 Dec 10, 8:22 PM The_TOGmeister UK(BA), 4 yrs  |
Manure is cooled down poo, this is why you see piles of the stuff in farmyards, stables etc. It has to cool and start to break down biologically or it would cause far more damage to the soil than good. Second childhood? Me? I haven't left the first one yet! | |
| 1 Jan 11, 8:32 PM frederick_hende 20 mths |
Manure? Sir, I once shat a gargoyle. | |
| 15 Feb 11, 9:42 PM NimueBanditQueen UK(MK), 2 yrs |
Damn, am I too late to request the 'cock with bobbly eyes stuck on the end'?
He moves me...he moves me not... | |
| 15 Feb 11, 10:49 PM Grownup_Frankie UK, 4 yrs |
I think that blog would make a great opening for a contemporary novel. "Yet I rejoice in the great harm done me, for this reason only, that I am more mine being yours, than were I mine." - Michelangelo | |
| 9 Mar 11, 11:15 PM Tim_themerciless UK(N), 2 yrs |
Cpt Vimes, this is hardly a matter for public discussion. I suggest your consult your GP, or speak to the regimental surgeon next time you go for linament and clap pills. |
Imortatality's far WORSE.