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| relaxed1 |
on Mon 15 Nov 10, 8:25 PM to relaxed1's blog.
Not the whimsical recent thread regarding what people mean when they say “discretion expected and assured” but a slightly more serious consideration.
Whenever one reads a profile, one needs to try to understand what it really means. When someone says that they're only looking for chat, but not with men who are attached or married, why? Why does the status of someone have any bearing on his ability to engage in meaningful discourse? If, on the other hand, the unspoken truth is that the profile belongs to someone who is looking for more than chat, but only as a natural development if it should be the case, then why not say so?
Isn't it so much easier, so much more fruitful and so much more consistent with the fundamentals of open and honest communication to call a spade a spade?
I can understand that it is of course a reaction to the slew of dishonest people, and I can support the principle of not indulging their dishonesty by providing them with an outlet for their one-handed typing, but isn't it also self-defeating?
| 19 Nov 10, 2:41 PM Manson UK(M), 2 yrs |
Ah, yes. I guess there are so many ways of describing a spade without actually calling it one. And as for reading between the lines, it can become a full time occupation in human interactions - people will play games, but a lot of the time they are not aware they are even playing them. I guess one has to ask oneself, how many people are truly committed to the idea of open and honest communication (and also this can mean different things to different people).
Those of us who are intractably honest can find it a struggle. Even when we are totally honest, we can expect that someone will be reading between the lines on the lookout for what we really mean As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. - Goethe. |
