This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.
| Wed 20 Oct 10, 9:52 PM SillyScreenName UK(SA), 5 yrs   |
Hey there, some ideas please.. My lady & I had been off travelling the world for about a year before Dystopia & we didn't really find the space (physical & head) to play kinky even though we both love it. Since being back we've sort of played but its been very gentle (kind of d/s rather than D/s). Dystopia last weekend opened my eyes about what we weren't doing anymore in a general way. My woman agreed with me that it could be fun forcing ourselves a little further. I'm the D in our relationship & I'm trying to think of goood things to do/get my sub to do when we're playing. I don't rate myself at this at the best of times & I feel particularly bad now so I thought I'd ask for the help of a self-confessed sub or two.. What are your fave situations/tasks/chellenges? Standing in the corner being a candlestick? Being handcuffed to the shower then having it turned on you on full cold? Not whimpering when getting spanked because you know you'll get 10 more? I'd love to hear some ideas! Thanks, SSN | |
| 20 Oct 10, 9:56 PM inappropriate  UK(CF), 3 yrs |
I think to really make her feel submissive, it has to be personal. Maybe think about what acts have got the desired response in the past and somehow increase the intensity. Or ask her to help you out by telling you what she thinks might work for her.
I hope that's helpful | |
| 20 Oct 10, 10:08 PM the1whoserves UK(DN), 6 yrs |
perhaps get her to write a story detailing what she would do to you if she was a domme,, then when you have digested the story ,, get her to write another one,, with the roles as they stand,, namely you as dom,,and she as sub,,, take the best bits that intrest you both and mix them up into a scene ,, you should both enjoy,,oh and don,t rush it ,, many scene have been spoilt by the domme/dom pushing too hard and fast,, sometimes it is better to step back now and then and let whthe sensations sink in,, hope it helps,,but what do i know, just a guy who likes to serve,, | |
| 20 Oct 10, 10:16 PM chastityslaveFE 2 yrs |
This is the hottest thing I have read in ages. It might or might not be your thing, but I just had to share. chastity xxx | |
| 21 Oct 10, 2:14 PM Purrrrvert UK, 19 mths |
I agree, very hot story. Unfortunately it'd be a slow burn to enact it, and he wouldn't get the pleasure of seeing her cum for him for long periods of time. I'm all for earning the orgasm though. Maybe tie her on her stomach with one hand free and a vibe, and beat her whilst she trys to come. Better still, have her standing up with her ankles attached to a spreader bar, put clamps on her pussy lips, and attach them with string to her ankles so that she has to squat slightly and it pulls her lips appart. Then hold a vibe just out of reach, so that if she wants to work herself off on it she has to thrust her hips forward and tug on the clamps.
Have fun | |
| 21 Oct 10, 2:48 PM Avada_Kedavra UK, 7 yrs |
Set you sub a task asking her to detail what turns her on, ask her to include deepest darkest fantasies etc. If any of what she has written down appeals to you as well, then do it. M: Its only a baby needle, you wont know the difference. I am not a one dimensional needle obssessed domme... | |
| 21 Oct 10, 2:52 PM Relaxed_and_Chaotic UK(SE), 3 yrs |
This is what i had to do when i was first with Master, i think it is a very useful thing to do...it also shows me jsut how far i have come since then. As for the link...i followed it and oh my YES!!!!! "There is no such thing as liberty. You only change one sort of domination for another. All we can do is to choose our master." D. H. Lawrence | |
| 21 Oct 10, 3:00 PM maid2sir 20 mths |
So deliciously cruel...hope Master doesn't read it.!!!! | |
| 21 Oct 10, 3:50 PM trillium UK(N), 4 yrs |
Stop worrying about what to do to please your sub until you know what needs to be done to please yourself, expand on this and integrate her needs into your own. I'm saying this as a sub/bottom and a Top/'Dom' that needs to take my own advice. "It's pointless to be hesitant when you're absorbed in play. It's like throwing cold water on ecstasy once it's finally caught flame." (from Tsujimura Takashi's Camera Hunt) Edited 21 Oct 10, 3:51 PM by trillium | |
| 21 Oct 10, 5:04 PM SillyScreenName UK(SA), 5 yrs |
Hey guys, thanks for the support and advice. That's a great story but a fantasy not a reality for my future. I like purrvert's suggested scenes, nice  However I think the idea of getting it all written down is the best one to start with.
Thanks again kids | |
| 22 Oct 10, 7:13 PM lapetitemort55 UK(E), 4 yrs |
kkk I like this thread. Of course it all depends on the individual and what you have tried already but... with that disclaimer I will continue... my fav tasks ? The silence thing is good .. not being able to speak for a whole day (or as long as you wish) and maybe having "permission" cards. i.e may I use the bathroom etc.Permission games are good and they help for a submissive mind set. Beginning to only come when given permission and then training oneself to come when told to is always a nice process. Tasks such as buying particular things sexual or otherwise , dressing in a certain way , washing with a certain cream any and every little thing that you do because you have been "told" to is a task and a pleasure in terms of sexual submission. I like the setting up to fail "tasks" myself.The unfairness of it is lovely.Giving (impossible) timelimits could be an idea you may wish to try. "punishments" for impossible tasks or as a form of correction. i.e for breaking the rules e.g will always curtsey/kneel when entering or leaving your presence is a good one initally as we tend to forget. Even if she remembers you can be picky about how that is carried out but it can be anything you like as a routine or submissive gesture. "serving" - sexually, dinner , housework etc, whilst having painful or sexual stimulation i.e objects inserted or, hanging from particular areas is nice.
sensory deprivation is good too. just a few idea's. My fav punishments are being spanked , belted or flogged and being made to say thank-you ( some times after each hit) Denial pretty simple really. good luck ... enjoy one another. Part of the beauty of it is that you will find your own "flow" as it were. I think D/s is very much an individual vibe between two people as is any kind of sex/relationship/way of relating. The basics are the same but the connection is very unique. Try it , if doesnt feel natural and easy , its not for you and try something else !
The absence of apostrophes is to get you .. yes .. it is. Grating yet ? |
