| 21 Sep 10, 9:39 PM northern_light UK, 7 yrs  |
Thinking of you all and so glad you all have each others support. "Absinthe is the aphrodisiac of the self. The green fairy who lives in the Absinthe wants your soul." ~Dracula by Bram Stoker | |
| 21 Sep 10, 10:09 PM RubyRouge UK(S), 4 yrs  |
Hope all goes well and he recovers soon. Hugs xx "While the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn't there?" | |
| 21 Sep 10, 10:14 PM Prunesquallor UK(RG), 7 yrs |
Hoping the condition will prove to be operable. Best wishes to all. 'To loose' means 'to let go'. 'Lose' means you can't find it. 'Discrete' means separate. 'Crescendo' means 'growing'. 'Fulsome' doesn't mean 'full'. 'Unique' doesn't mean 'very unusual'. | |
| 21 Sep 10, 11:56 PM subette 2 yrs |
I didn't read it this way, but I guess if people might take Degenerate's OP as having an edge of competition, then I suppose they could also read my response that way too. I just read the OP as @Degenerate explaining the strength that she gets from her Poly relationships at times like this and wondering aloud how other people in different situations cope. I don't want to put words in Degenerate's mouth, just pointing out it can be taken another way. Subette 'What is more basic than the need to be known? It is the entirety of intimacy, the elixir of love, this knowing.' Audrey Niffenegger - Her Fearful Symmetry | |
| 22 Sep 10, 10:08 AM Degenerate  UK(M), 5 yrs   |
Cheers subette you're right - I didn't quite mean it that way, so now I am looking at the phrasing and thinking how stupid I was not to realise the implications of how I've written that and find a more accurate and correct way to explain what I mean. It was a fairly throwaway comment I didn't think too deeply about. I only intended to lightly turn on it's head the hundreds of times we are asked (as if mono people never struggle) 'how do we manage' as if it's just taken for granted that monogamy is easier/ better/ and so on. Perhaps I'd have been better to have the question, in this situation - how would we manage if we weren't poly? Answer: Things would be a LOT worse for us and more stressful. Partly it is bemusing to be asked those questions again and again - it's times like this which show me how inappropriate they can be. I have lived this way so long I cannot fully imagine being without JT to share the load, the same way others cannot imagine living as we do. The idea is quite scary at a time like this - genuinely I don't know how I or JT would manage emotionally, were the situation different and how our boy would be. It would be awful and it's already awful enough. I don't mean (or didn't mean to suggest) non-poly people can't cope at all at difficult times - what I do mean is that were I mono -or were someone mono in my (or JT's) actual complex / difficult position (with health, kids, distance, poverty, and so on) - this would be a nightmare and much harder to cope with and Gordon would be alone for a lot of time he won't have to, with nobody to watch over him. Thats just fact. Now I'm called out on it it's clear that's because of multiple things not just whether we're poly or not. Nonetheless in our situation, it's an advantage, not a problem. I stand by the notion that were WE not poly, this would be much much harder to manage. That doesn't mean others don't manage different situations by different means and I should have covered that.. we do have extra routes to support that others do not have though. Saying so is not the same as saying that means it's 'better' and I'm really sorry if I implied that, because I don't believe it.
I know no relationship style is better than another - just what suits each of us best - tbh I repeat that so often it didn't occur to me anyone might think I could think otherwise. So sorry for my lax choice of words implying that could be the case, the last thing I want to do is offend people I regard highly like you Spirifer. Have changed the blog title a little to reflect this and not sure whether to alter the blog or what. Might just indicate there's further discussion on how I've written some of it with head up arse (again) De Vote to repeal the kinky porn ban! http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/282427/ Edited 22 Sep 10, 12:46 PM by Degenerate | |
| 22 Sep 10, 10:25 AM CommanderBondage 3 yrs |
I am so grateful and humbled by the outpouring of love and support during this difficult time in my life.
My extended family have given me so much strength words cannot describe how blessed I feel.
Unconditional love is just that, titles, labels do not apply.(Although being called "boy" does tend to get a reaction  ) xxxxx PS feeling much better today even though I look as if I have been in a fight..... | |
| 22 Sep 10, 10:59 AM Degenerate UK(M), 5 yrs |
Aw honey your lovely smooth head looks a mess now huh - can't believe they made 5 holes! So glad you're home already with JT can't wait to see you Missing you like crazy, .. our wonderful boy xxxx
Vote to repeal the kinky porn ban! http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/282427/ Edited 22 Sep 10, 11:00 AM by Degenerate | |
| 22 Sep 10, 9:23 PM Avada_Kedavra UK, 7 yrs |
Hugs to you and G xxxx M: Its only a baby needle, you wont know the difference. I am not a one dimensional needle obssessed domme... | |
| 22 Sep 10, 11:19 PM wonderer UK, 5 yrs |
All best wishes to you both, and all concerned. Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/226772/ |
