Reluctant Dom(me) (21)

Before you judge me, consider if at any time during the reading of this ... you've been aroused. If the answer is yes then you must judge both of us.
Social order at the expense of liberty is hardly a bargain.
It is always by way of pain one arrives at pleasure. (all Marquis de Sade)

Edited Sun 25 Apr 10, 1:12 PM by Viking_Domme_Slave

An hour of that was all she wanted... should a sub complain about getting what he wants? I don't think so, he should be grateful for whatever he gets!

ETA ~ I so often wonder why subs think they should "get what they want" from the dominant... for me, it's about the dominant getting what they want from the sub - hopefully the two will be compatible.

Q. What are the components of a good dynamic? A. The mutual desire to share ourselves with each other. (If you don't want to share yourself with me, don't offer yourself to me.)
@The_Problem_page

Edited 25 Apr 10, 11:39 AM by chartreuse

Sure - point her to this post. It should either piss her off enough to give you a good ball bashing, or give her the opportunity to ignore you for a while, showing the mental side of it.

She isn't at your beck and call. You are at hers.

You could try some service and some "nice" pain rather than extreme. Serve her with "no strings" sometimes, and let her do activities when are not so extreme pain oriented so she sees you really LIKE the pain. It is difficult for a lot of people to "hurt" the people they love. Once she sees that it is not "hurting you", it becomes easier.

I will give you a hint though - the more people nag the more likely it turns into a pain in the neck rather than fun from all the pressure.

These particular words incensed me. 'Should be doing to her sub' in whose opinion?

Have you talked to her about this? Have you tried to find a solution between the two of you?

If my sub posted something like this well, I don't think we would have a future.

"Eats shoots and leaves" or maybe "Eats, shoots and leaves"
Your or you're so do you know the difference?
"Grains of sand is all we are, crawling on our manic star"

Tact not your strong point eh ?

If play doesn't work for her at the moment, then she's not going to do it. Attempts to goad her into action are more likely to make her go off the idea even more.

If you want a Domme to deliver exactly what you want, go see a Pro.

BTW If I was her and saw this, I would leave you begging for weeks.

Ingrid x
"Man has to suffer. When he has no real afflictions, he invents some." Jose Marti
“How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.” Oscar Wilde

Maybe she hopes you too will see that perhaps in a full loving relationship - whatever floated your boat about getting kicked in the balls by a female - should be diminishing into the past too... especially when that peson wishes it to be a mutually loving relationship... in short little backward steps away from a scebne she now feels unhealthy or somewhat of her past and that she would seem will head further that way without your insistence otherwise.

Talk with your partner for that is what one does in a relationship - not with a crowd here who will certainly not pitch the above perspective. By being here posters evidently still find merit in more than the simple startorial aspect... which I am sure is all many your partner and many might really seek of the IC interest.. if even that as time passes.

Equally because of number and distance - it is hard not to select the answers that have most merit simply as those which best fit your own hope or preference. The right answer may not be the one you wish to hear and almost certianly would not lie on a site such as this where there is clearly a bias to the continuance and perceived normality of an IC relationship over the vanilla norm.

How can you tell if the answers you embrace are not ones of a complete numpty - and potentially the worst advice?

If you do have a relationshop issue with your partner over your 'need' for pain... it is probably better to get professional councelling to heal the underlying causes of that urge ( and they will be there) and build your relationship without it... grow a beautiful vaniall realationship...its time to outgrow this.

Maybe the issue is as painful for her as it is for the sub, trying to place it in another place then failing absymally,

This needs to be a nuetral place and any amount of time it takes because it seems even more than loss of Domme/sub dynamic. an interesting journey maybe all parties are afraid to take.

She is the Domme, give her respect she deserves, you are her sub, understand your place and both need to realise we are all human, sometimes the extension blurs the lines. Good luck.

desire is the urge to have that which is not necessary but will kill you if you do not have it, breathe, deep, breathe
There you go.

you simply do not make these sort of posts about your partner no matter what(my personal view). its just not done, if you and your partner are not seeing eye to eye on this subject then it is something for you both to sit down together and discuss

if the sane judge the insane ..........who judges the sane

A sadist is someone who refuses to be mean to a masochist!

-D-
“Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.”

Edited 25 Apr 10, 12:47 PM by Anxises