Is D/s entrapment or seduction? (9)

Seduction of the mind (and body, if you're lucky).

Pedants and wordsmiths will shoot me down with precise definitions, but:

Seduction to me suggests enticing you somewhere you really want to go anyway.

Entrapment suggests being lured into something with a false promise, something that you may not have wanted if not for the lure.

I'll be your number one with a bullet,
A loaded god complex, cock it and pull it

Owner of The Croppery Dungeon and Breakfast. Organises The St Leonards munch Promotes The Club with no name

You know they say it's always the quiet ones you have to watch? That's me.

But already there have been a few responses to the effect that entrapment is a positive aspect of Ds. I rather suspect that interpretation of "entrapment" is not quite how I would interpret the word.

A feeling of "entrapment" (or whatever the converse is from the dom side) is very much a part of the seduction in D/s. What I mean is that rather yummy feeling of irrevocability in surrendering control and authority to someone who you can love and trust enough to give your whole self to.

But I would not literally call that entrapment. And real entrapment, which is abusive and inevitably damaging behaviour, is something that unfortunately I think sometimes does find its way into Ds.

It is not necessarily always the case where it appears so, since we can't all comprehend the dynamic of everyone elses relationship (or sometimes even our own!). But within Ds there is such huge scope for it to occur that I can have no doubt there must be "dominants" who will actually set out to make someone excessively dependant, maybe sometimes even deliberately preying on the vulnerable, for purely self-seeking ends - maybe hiding behind some of the more esoteric and arcane gobbledegook of "BDSM theory" to even convince themselves that they are acting in the subs best interest. That is more what I would call "entrapment".

There is also I suppose a form of entrapment that can come from subs themselves even with a well-intentioned dom. The feeling of giving and belonging in Ds can be very addictive to many. And finding the "right" dominant is often elusive, so quite a big deal when it happens. Wishful thinking can easily make a sub far too dependant in what is quite a casual interaction that has never been presented to them as anything but. Unequal investment in a relationship might seem very good for a Ds dynamic - and so I'm sure it usually is, if it is SLIGHT. But "needy sub syndrome" where the dom is entirely non-needy is no good for either.

Yield to seduction, but beware of entrapment every time I'd say!

I AM THE GOD OF HELL-FIRE!.....but its my lunch break right now

Edited 20 Mar 10, 5:46 PM by BigOldHector

Best answer yet!

;; Semper in faecibus sumus, sole profundum variat.
Some of my stories are here. Others are here.

When someone does something for me that they didn't want to do, but did it anyway because it was for me- I'm deeply honored. When they discover that they enjoy it (as I suspected they would) and want it again- that's a cause for celebration.

How I got them to that point is part seduction, part communication, part dominance, part instinct, and occasionally part painting them into a corner (entrapment).

SinPar

-- The weak are the most treacherous of us all. They come to the strong and drain them. They are bottomless. They are insatiable. They are always parched and always bitter. They are everyone's concern, and like vampires they suck our life's blood. (Bette Davis)