How do you ensure your own safety? (47)

This post is on the Pro-Mistresses etc web board.

Mon 1 Mar 10, 10:22 PM
tempysankajira
UK, 4 yrs
Im not sure if this has been asked before, i had a quick search but couldnt find anything relevant.
Im curious to know how in your professional role do you go about ensuring your own personal safety when sessioning with clients, especially with first time clients. I am aware that some PD's have a kind of sitter for the duration of the session but surely this isnt practical every time you session and what if this isn't an option available to you?
Also how do you minimise other potential safety risks that could happen outside of the session, for example that guy that had been posting and blogging everywhere about a Mistress that he claimed had abused him although it actually appeared he was just waging a vendetta due to not getting what he wanted from the said Mistress.

~* Raku wa ku no tané; ku wa raku no tané. *~

1 Mar 10, 10:42 PM
Lady_Anna_Bradford
UK(BD), 3 yrs
£
The question has been asked before but nobody is really prepared to disclose their personal security measures, for obvious reasons. You don't know who is reading these posts, and what notes they are taking, or why.
PDs being in danger has been discussed before. In my opinion, based on newspaper reports and lack of anecdotal evidence to the contrary, the client is at more risk from a con-Domme, and her baseball bat wielding boyfriend, than a genuine PD is from a client.
Most of us, certainly the IC PDsthat I personally know, take a great deal of care in selecting which applications we want to take further. Most of us are by appointment only, and most of us have a very rigorous application process that tends to weed out the idiots and obsessed types. We also make them jump through hoops such as confirming on the day of the session but refusing to disclose our exact location until they are stood outside our premises so that we can inspect them for hidden machetes.
We also take a great deal of care in our level of service which means clients are happy, and don't feel cheated. It is also necessary to maintain strict personal boundaries so we dont encourage unwanted attentions from enamoured clients.
Outside of session there is very little you can do apart from hope that malicious campaigns are obvious to your colleagues and clients. The fact is, that only a timy proportion of our client base spends time reading forums or blogs. They are far too busy working and living life.
"If no sexual offence is being committed it seems very odd indeed that there should be an offence for having an image of something which was not an offence," Lord Wallace of Tankerness
http://www.clips4sale.com/studio/26308 http://ladyannadominatrix.c4slive.com/ http://www.professionaldomination.co.uk
Edited 1 Mar 10, 10:50 PM by Lady_Anna_Bradford

1 Mar 10, 11:14 PM
OllieVW
UK(EH), 16 mths

I use a condom
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
John 16:33 (KJV)

2 Mar 10, 6:37 PM
MissP
UK(EN), 6 yrs
Always try to get a mobile and landline number as well as an email addy. Hotmail is not best. Ask clients to pay a deposit via Paypal (this is anonymous for them, unless they turn out to be a mad axe murderer).
Try not to be alone, have a maid or slave to hand if possible. If not, a safe call is a good idea.
Some dungeons have CCTV outside and a link to the local nick via a panic button.

www.thedivinemissp.co.uk

2 Mar 10, 6:37 PM
tempysankajira
UK, 4 yrs

Lady_Anna_Bradford wrote:
The question has been asked before but nobody is really prepared to disclose their personal security measures, for obvious reasons. You don't know who is reading these posts, and what notes they are taking, or why.
PDs being in danger has been discussed before. In my opinion, based on newspaper reports and lack of anecdotal evidence to the contrary, the client is at more risk from a con-Domme, and her baseball bat wielding boyfriend, than a genuine PD is from a client.
Most of us, certainly the IC PDsthat I personally know, take a great deal of care in selecting which applications we want to take further. Most of us are by appointment only, and most of us have a very rigorous application process that tends to weed out the idiots and obsessed types. We also make them jump through hoops such as confirming on the day of the session but refusing to disclose our exact location until they are stood outside our premises so that we can inspect them for hidden machetes.
We also take a great deal of care in our level of service which means clients are happy, and don't feel cheated. It is also necessary to maintain strict personal boundaries so we dont encourage unwanted attentions from enamoured clients.
Outside of session there is very little you can do apart from hope that malicious campaigns are obvious to your colleagues and clients. The fact is, that only a timy proportion of our client base spends time reading forums or blogs. They are far too busy working and living life.
Thank you for your insightful responce..... i didnt think about the fact posting about such things here could be seen as problematic but i guess that makes sense really, so thank you for sharing what you did.

~* Raku wa ku no tané; ku wa raku no tané. *~

2 Mar 10, 6:39 PM
tempysankajira
UK, 4 yrs

MissP wrote:
Ask clients to pay a deposit via Paypal (this is anonymous for them, unless they turn out to be a mad axe murderer).

Actually this is a good point... but as paypal have all your personal information do they not get to see that in the transaction details?
~* Raku wa ku no tané; ku wa raku no tané. *~

2 Mar 10, 6:58 PM
MissP
UK(EN), 6 yrs

hinoeuma wrote:

MissP wrote:
Ask clients to pay a deposit via Paypal (this is anonymous for them, unless they turn out to be a mad axe murderer).

Actually this is a good point... but as paypal have all your personal information do they not get to see that in the transaction details?
Memo coming!
www.thedivinemissp.co.uk

2 Mar 10, 8:31 PM
MADAMECARAMEL
UK(E), 3 yrs
£ Y!
Paypal doesnt want to be associated with "us"!! You will be deleted. I used paypal before for more than 4 years now my account is now closed and they will not allow me to set up another in 2 years!!!

hinoeuma wrote:

MissP wrote:
Ask clients to pay a deposit via Paypal (this is anonymous for them, unless they turn out to be a mad axe murderer).

Actually this is a good point... but as paypal have all your personal information do they not get to see that in the transaction details?

Edited 2 Mar 10, 8:32 PM by MADAMECARAMEL

3 Mar 10, 11:29 AM
Mistress_sultrybelle
UK(G), 10 mths
£

hinoeuma wrote:
How do you ensure your own safety?
Im not sure if this has been asked before, i had a quick search but couldnt find anything relevant.
Im curious to know how in your professional role do you go about ensuring your own personal safety when sessioning with clients, especially with first time clients. I am aware that some PD's have a kind of sitter for the duration of the session but surely this isnt practical every time you session and what if this isn't an option available to you?
Also how do you minimise other potential safety risks that could happen outside of the session, for example that guy that had been posting and blogging everywhere about a Mistress that he claimed had abused him although it actually appeared he was just waging a vendetta due to not getting what he wanted from the said Mistress.

If you work from a professional dungeon then their are usually other mistresses there. But I guess its like any job where you interact with the public, their are risks. I have'nt heard of anyone being attacked but I don't know alot of mistresses.
www.glasgowdominatrix.co.uk

3 Mar 10, 12:31 PM
redgerbil
UK(NR), 12 mths
Generally speaking my guess is that professional domination is safer for both partners than lifestyle relationships where quite often little background is known.
'Kiss the boot of shiny, shiny leather' - Velvet Underground

3 Mar 10, 2:35 PM
Mistress_Susannah
UK(SE), 5 yrs
£
Like Lady Anna, I have my own personal security measures that I won't divulge on open board.
I will say that the best way to secure your safety is by being extremely selective about who you see in the first place. It's the best safety mechanism that I know and also cuts down dramatically on timewasters.

www.mistresssusannah.co.uk
www.professionaldomination.co.uk

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