| melita |
Having been away from IC for a little while i have obviously fallen behind with everyones blogs so i have spent a little time playing catch up. i chose to pick up on this particular one as it happens to be a question i have asked myself recently.
See, i consider myself to be a very open and honest person on the whole, much preferring to speak the truth as well as hear it. If you are constantly streaming out a web of lies yourself you can hardly complain if you should discover someone is or has been lying to you now can you? So treat people how you yourself wish to be treated is a very good moral, one which i do indeed try to stick to. Malicious lies are nasty and so un- necessary.
But.......
There always comes a time when telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth could actually cause more harm than good, this is where even the most honest and truthful person will resort to the 'little white lie'. These small diversions are never lies intended to hurt, but rather protect. i seriously doubt that not one single person can 'truthfully' say that they have never told a white lie in the name of protecting someone in some way. But be warned....even harmless and non- malicious little white lies can cause lots of damage as i have recently discovered to my cost.
i, unfortunatley, found myself in the position where i felt i had to do just this quite recently. Now i have no intentions of explaining the whole thing here as a) i don't name names and b) its too damn complicated!) but suffice to say that i told somebody something which was not entirely true in order to protect somebody else. This something involved a friend but only indirectly and didn't actually affect them in any way at all (or shouldn't have done at least). What i said was then repeated back to the friend who took the 'little white lie which didn't even affect them' quite personally.....destroying the friendship. Told you it was complicated!
Result?
One friend.....lost.
One confidant.....dropped.
One lesson.....learned.
i do offer my apology to said friend, although i do not expect it to be accepted.
Edited Tue 7 Dec 04, 3:22 PM by melita