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| LittleMissEvil |
Ok sometimes information falls in to you're lap it's normally nothing of importance, a friend has done x someone else has done y. But every now and then some information presents itself to you that put's you in a tricky situation. One where you know that you should say something about it but know that in saying something could leave you open to having you're life picked over and certain things coming out that you are not overly keen about the world knowing. Not because you are ashamed of it, just that it's not something you wish to talk about publicly.
Now before anyone gets on and says anything about 'outing' someone, it's no one from here and it's got nothing to do with BDSM.
A brief outline of the information; I started talking to someone whom I thought was female, and we had several conversations on msn, and exchanged a few texts, and nothing unusual set of any alarm bells as I would say I am normally good at spotting someone whom is pretending to be something they are not.
Well we had arranged to meet as we got on well and see what happened. Then 24 hours before we were supposed to meet all communications stopped with no explanation.
Now I know that people can have emergencies happen or they can loose their phone ECT and not be able to reply. So after I had sent a few texts and got no reply the inquisitive person in me decided to do a bit of digging.
From this I found out that the person I had been talking to was not a woman, and was a person who held a position of responsibility with in the community, and was portrayed as an upstanding family man. With aspirations of furthering his career in the public sphere.
Now had this been Joe blogs who was a builder it wouldn't throw up this issue, but it's the fact that he is doing this whilst portraying a very wholesome front.
Now if you were in my position what would you do? Part of me says to go to the press with this and let them decide what they want to do, though that could allow them to reveal certain facts about me that I wouldn't be overly happy about being totally public knowledge. So what would you all do?
| 14 Feb 10, 8:00 PM scarlettsamm UK(BL), 6 yrs  |
id walk away, have no further contact and not look back and Lady Stardust sang her songs, of..... | |
| 14 Feb 10, 8:44 PM Visualize 4 yrs £ |
I don't really see why you would need to out someone to the press for being a bullshitter, and I don't really see the relevance of his prominence or otherwise - it just sounds a bit.....vengeful. There are a lot of them around and this one happened to fool you for a while, but dishonest as he was, he probably didn't do anything illegal, or endanger anyone - he just wasted some of your time.....#
ETA I dont condone his behavior, but I wouldn't condone vengeful responses either - in my experience they tend to bite one on the arse The past is history, tomorrow is a mystery, the present is a gift. Edited 14 Feb 10, 8:47 PM by Visualize | |
| 14 Feb 10, 8:45 PM aka_kelly UK(YO), 2 yrs |
Depends how evil you want to be, walk away, reveal all or blackmail.
Blackmail could end in jail, if you wish to remain anonymous, i'd walk away and put it down to experience I used to be normal | |
| 14 Feb 10, 9:11 PM Kali_Ma UK(B), 5 yrs |
Walk away. If you do anything else you may well open Pandoras Box. It's not for you to judge his reasons or motivations. And if you did do something, do you want to be responsible for the hurt this would cause his family? Walk away, head high and move on. K x It's pronounced 'Car-Lee' *G* | |
| 14 Feb 10, 9:20 PM Caracal  UK(SS), 4 yrs      |
Outing is still outing even if it is not bdsm connected.
There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness. | |
| 14 Feb 10, 10:11 PM Cagoulion UK, 7 yrs |
Well it certainly is creepy. Not everybody is who they say they are and it certainly points to someone who is insecure about who they are. It's usually the deceit of someone who isn't brave enough to be who they want to be and uses these kind of deceptions to get the contact they really want. But to the person it happens to it's like being stalked, not a nice thing and making you feel used. However the problem is that the old expression "Live by the sword die by the sword" means that the press rarely tells things the way you'd think. If he has aspirations to public life keeping it on file in yer head might be more productive but then again you might just end up with a head full of unpleasant secrets which isn't good either. Personally I'd chalk him up as somebody not nice and make a face when people mention him subsequently if they do. | |
| 14 Feb 10, 10:36 PM smallwitch UK, 4 yrs |
I think it is a horrible idea to think about possibly wrecking someones life just because they are presenting themeselves as upstanding. A Fictional Joe bloggs the builder may also have a good reputation within his community. The only difference is that there may be more financial/publicity pickings by outing someone who is in the public eye.
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| 14 Feb 10, 11:47 PM El_Presidente UK(G), 4 yrs   |
I don't really see the dilemma. If you were willing to meet this person, then they couldn't have said anything that was *that* bad, beyond the fact that they lied about not being a woman, etc. That being the case, what would anyone stand to gain by you outing this person? Would it be worth wrecking their life for? | |
| 15 Feb 10, 12:35 AM strokes321 UK(M), 2 yrs |
John terry or vernon? | |
| 15 Feb 10, 2:17 AM Wings_of_a_Butterfly 2 yrs |
Have to agree with majority of previous posts. Walk away. Put it down to life experience. We all know there are people that walk the earth who are not who they say they are. I personally don't think you have anything to gain but personal scrutiny. Yes, perhaps you may be paid a small fee for telling his little secret but it would make others wonder about your true motives.
Yes, a few small words and his family will/could get ripped apart. All for the farce of claiming to be a woman. Maybe he is struggling with his identity? This is something only he should be outing. What if your wrong??
NAH, I say you keep on with your happy life and forget the people who are not happy with their own. **In life, as in dreams. NOTHING is quiet as it seems** - Book of Counted Sorrows |
