LDR and punishments (4)

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Mon 8 Feb 10, 8:36 PM
subjxx
UK(OX), 2 yrs
I am wondering how those of you with LDR cope with meting out punishments. I am fortunate that I get to see Master once a week and he mets out any punishments then. But in my mind, having to wait for the punishment means it does not mean the same as when the crime is committed (so to speak).
What punishments do your subs have to do when they are alone.
Do they do lines?
Do they do essays?
Do you tell them to go to bed early?
jxx

9 Feb 10, 6:18 PM
horizontal_veins
UK(BN), 3 yrs Agreed - much better to do it at the time.
It's not something I have a lot of experience with - but things I like include: lines, essays, wanking bans, emailing photos of something that would be considered punishment, usually along the humiliation front.

10 Feb 10, 8:56 PM
gothicmum
UK(RM), 3 yrs
£
have to admit on the spot has and does seem alot better to me would be intresting to see what the replys are
Gothicmum
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10 Feb 10, 9:19 PM
OllieVW
UK(EH), 11 mths

Works both ways.
Waiting, knowing your in trouble, going to be punished, creates an amazing sense of fear. Not knowing when its going to happen.
Take Rape scenes, i know its not punishment per-say but ive a good friend who says its mind blowing not knowing when or where.
Remember when you were small "wait till your father gets home" shitting a brick, trying to make up for your wrong. If youve made the mistake before and know what happened the last time your head gets all fucked up with anxiety.
YUMMY
Gives your partner all the more time to plan and prepare for a suitable punishment and also to inflict said punishment without emotional attachment i.e. "anger"

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10 Feb 10, 9:27 PM
lima_pink_tigress
UK(G), 16 mths

I'm actualy really glad this thread came up. Ollie and I were talking about this the other night.
I have very mixed feelings about punishment anyway but that aside, the issue of when is best is a big one.
My professional background is in education therefore my experience of behaviour modification (rewards and punishments) is with children, so perhaps it's not as simplistic when applying BM to adults.
The idea behind immediate punishment (or praise/reward for that matter) is that it is, where possible, directly associated (in time) to the behaviour, therefore strengthening the cause and effect link. As I said that works extremely well for children but for adults I don't imagine it's just as important in order for the punishment to be effectual.
And of course the other side of that is the fear and anticipation of having to wait, knowing what's coming (generaly, even if you don't know the specific punishment) and the emotional punishment that that alone could bring - which could in itself be a problem because it tends to drag things out rather than an issue being delt with and the slate being cleared fairly quickly.
That, I suspect, is for each couple to decide which option best fits their particular dynamic i.e. oportunity for immediate punishment, how delayed punishment would work (or not) for each of them, and the effect having to wait and keeping things 'bottled up' has on them individually and as a couple.
Another consideration, which is the biggest one for me, is that if Ollie does/says something to upset me on a Tuesday and I don't see him again till the Thursday, unless it's something particularly awful, I'm very likely to have calmed down and not be so upset about it by then, therefore having to dole out a punishment after such a delay would seem false and almost staged to me (this is just my personal view on how I feel and how I see punishment to be most effective - if it's genuine and done with real intense feeling i.e. disappointment, hurt, but not anger). For me that would need to be immediate.
Again it's very dependent on your individual situationa dn what works best for you as individuals and as a couple. there are lots of punishments that can be handed out 'from a distance' and can be jsut as effectual as being punished in person.

In order to know virtue, we must first aquaint ourselves with vice - Marquis De Sade


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