Voting (46)

1) I said "a lot of" not "all".

2) Please don't imply that submissives who seek out dominants they can look up to have an "inferiority complex".

Tanos

www.tanos.org.uk
@Manchester ?

Edited 10 Feb 10, 7:45 AM by Tanos

That's great, but this is the O&P group:

"This is asymmetric and unequal in status. While the submissive is in the dominant's possession they are fundamentally there for the dominant, obeying the dominant, and subject to the dominant's decisions. The dominant is the submissive's superior, just as an employer is their servant's superior."

Tanos

www.tanos.org.uk
@Manchester ?

socair wrote: It's one of a million “what if” questions that can drive you mad, although that doesn't stop the thinking! Voting, contact with family and friends, and remaining a vegetarian have been my three “favourite” imagined conflicts which caused temporary insanity

hello, i can relate to this...in my process, most of the time i have found that thinking about 'what if' isn't really usefull (althoug unavoidable). When the time comes, you deal with a conflict in the context and reality then and there (not now and here, because it's a future conflict)...if you know what i mean. Things change, the dynamic changes...some things you feel 'i would never, i could never..' just disappear over time... So i try and learn bit by bit to live more and more in the moment and deal with everything that is now and here. Idealy a slave (like myself) should, shouldn't she? The future is not mine to control or to overthink.

Hey, i gathered some wisdom over time, but it is still theory, to a certain extand - don't get me wrong But i like this principle, i stand to it and it helps to have experienced that there is truth in it.

For example: i was very much attatched to my surname, when Frank and i met (9 years ago)...over time i changed my name to his (which is quite a taboo for modern women in my social environment nowadays). A real big thing! But i could and i feel right about it..in the context of our relationship it is the right thing to do. For him, and for me too.

HTMS (hope that makes sense ) dorine

I did not make that broad statement that you have attributed to me.

I responded to your narrower statement that submissives who seek out dominants they can look up to on the basis that the Dominant is more intelligent than they are (your words), are basing their search on an inferiority complex. I seek someone more intelligent than I, for I am less so (my words).

No need for implication here. It is express.

All I said was: "For a start, a lot of submissives seek out dominants who are more intelligent than themselves, that they can look up to."

You introduced the (derogatory) phrase "inferiority complex" in response.

Some submissives explicitly look for dominants who they consider to be superior (which necessarily makes the submissive the inferior in that comparison, even though it's a red flag term to many other people.)

I don't see how that is a "complex". I don't see how it's necessarily a mental health issue at all.

If we were just talking about height preferences, would you say "inferiority complex" too?

Tanos

www.tanos.org.uk
@Manchester ?

x_maude_x wrote: Sorry Tanos, no one mentioned mental health issues except you. I'm not going to argue with all the straw men you keep sticking in my mouth. And no, I don;t have a complex about it

I don't go around accusing people of having complexes ...

Tanos

www.tanos.org.uk
@Manchester ?

dorine_van_Frank wrote: socair wrote: It's one of a million “what if” questions that can drive you mad, although that doesn't stop the thinking! Voting, contact with family and friends, and remaining a vegetarian have been my three “favourite” imagined conflicts which caused temporary insanity hello, i can relate to this...in my process, most of the time i have found that thinking about 'what if' isn't really usefull (althoug unavoidable). When the time comes, you deal with a conflict in the context and reality then and there (not now and here, because it's a future conflict)...if you know what i mean. Things change, the dynamic changes...some things you feel 'i would never, i could never..' just disappear over time... So i try and learn bit by bit to live more and more in the moment and deal with everything that is now and here. Idealy a slave (like myself) should, shouldn't she? The future is not mine to control or to overthink. Hey, i gathered some wisdom over time, but it is still theory, to a certain extand - don't get me wrong But i like this principle, i stand to it and it helps to have experienced that there is truth in it. For example: i was very much attatched to my surname, when Frank and i met (9 years ago)...over time i changed my name to his (which is quite a taboo for modern women in my social environment nowadays). A real big thing! But i could and i feel right about it..in the context of our relationship it is the right thing to do. For him, and for me too. HTMS (hope that makes sense ) dorine

Hi dorine,

Your post makes perfect sense and I agree with you So often the “what ifs” end up in a kind of pessimistic frenzy which does nobody any good (even though they are still tempting).

Living in the moment is a peaceful place to be isn't it? It's the practising it which is challenging!

It's lovely to hear from you that some stuff is never worth the worry too

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society".

bop it

Bind me, gag me, beat me and make me yours - kk (I have - bop_it )

Under orders yes....although I would be very disappointed at my small loss of personal power (and in him if truth be told, as he knows it's something I value greatly).

Would I change my bank to one less ethical? No way. Ever. For me, morally, this is more important than my vote.

Just had another thought....What if he told me to vote for the BNP (he wouldn't - just a theoretical point)? Nope. Again never ever.

Would those who would change their vote if told, vote for something they despise? I couldn't.

N x