8 Feb 10, 3:49 PM
Purrverse
US, 6 yrs
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epona74 wrote:
I'm constantly amased at the concept that being younger somehow makes someone more interesting. More interesting to whom??
In my 20s I was about as boring as boring can be, though I dearly wished I could be otherwise. I suffered with depression, social phobia, I couldn't drink alcohol as it messed with my depression, and I was so anxious that having any sort of fun was just about impossible.
I'm now 36, and I've never had so much fun in my life!
I've dated women from 52 down to 25 (within 6 months of each other, as it happens), and pretty much anything in between. Physical age has bugger all to do with anything.
If you want fun, arty and silly people, then advertise for that. If you want people who enjoy dressing up, then advertise for that. Since you're going to be vetting potential attendees, there's no point to anything else.
As for how to approach giving criticism for something that is blatantly unpleasant to read...people have the right to point out that there's something seriously wrong, and to criticise people for doing so smacks of censorship to me. I understand getting the wording wrong, and fair do's for correcting that (though I personally still don't like it). But that could've been done with a "oops, we messed up, fair comment, we've corrected it now", rather than telling people off for DARING to criticise.
Personally, with that level of attitude, I wouldn't enjoy the event, regardless of my age.
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I think there's a huge difference between "censoring" and "tact". I lack tact, often, quite true. But I did mention the changing of the wording and continued to be attacked *when it was already fixed*.
::shrug:: I don't see anything wrong with asking people what they mean in a memo or pointing out an error, especially as it pertains to an event and not a question posed, rather than starting a flame war. But hey, it's the internet, right?
I've seen events on here whose policies I disagreed with.
I just didn't go. "I can't tell if you're playing some kind of feminazi mind fuck game on me or if you're trying to seduce me." -Sex and Death 101
Edited 8 Feb 10, 3:51 PM by Purrverse
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8 Feb 10, 3:50 PM
Anansie
UK(SW), 2 yrs
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Fair play to you.
I might come along...if I can fathom organising things/people/night buses/sleeping arrangements/phone numb etc. etc....no, no my brain can't take it.
One day, when impulse and your party happen to coincide with other impulsive people and train times, we shall make it so 
Bar the "meow-woof-hiss" mentality that comes with things so shiny, unfamiliar and new, I'm sure there will be a good following, vibe, etc. Edited 8 Feb 10, 3:52 PM by Anansie
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8 Feb 10, 3:52 PM
Ms_Tytania
6 yrs |
Purrverse, thanks for listening to all the criticism constructively. I know that a t the moment you and the KS team are busy bouncing off ideas and trying to find the way to express something we all know what it is, but don't know exactly how to achieve it.
As for your complaint about people being not as friendly as you expected them in London, as compared to San Francisco, I guess that's a cultural difference. When I go to Spain, I'm always amazed at the alarming speed with which I build up networks of all kinds, here takes a bit longer. People have to be approached differently, in different countries, nothing more. "People are inherently evil, but very, very funny" - Joe Orton.
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8 Feb 10, 3:53 PM
OllieVW
2 yrs
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BOUNCE is my middle name, im vain as fuck, 37 but havent heared off or know anybody in the "kinky salon crowed" well i dont think i do?
How do i get a Golden Ticket 
This post is for future reference  Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
Je t'adore, ich liebe dich,
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me slowly, hit me quick.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
Ian Dury & the Blockheads
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8 Feb 10, 4:00 PM
Miss_serena
3 yrs |
Purrverse wrote:
Oh dear, here we go again. Wasn't this the same thing as what happened with under 35 munches..?
Let me see if I can clarify some points:
-actually, the costume restriction is, in fact, placed on EVERYONE for the party. We're already welcomed more than a few over 35s to the group who have indicated they have the playful, silly attitude we're looking to create. Maybe I was insane trying to find people with that same attitude on IC, but hey.
-references so far have been people who we know, friends and friends of friends. Seems to be working.
-have you even read the website? Or are you enjoying fanning a flame war with your martyr complex?
-do you even know me? LOL! I'm about as unvanilla as one can get. Strangely, I feel that it's ok to throw a party where sex and kink CAN happen but isn't a focus- I don't see how that makes an event vanilla by any means.
-I've been helping run Kinky Salon (www.kinkysalon.com) in San Francisco for 5, 6 years, and it's not exactly just a "let's play dress up" party. Though, to be honest, I don't see what's wrong with having an event that IS a "let's play dress up" party- I just wanted one where I didn't have to worry if I wanted to fuck and/or slap my partner.
-discrimination? Um. I could say that events that require latex outfits is classist, or queer play parties are homosexist, or that the many swing parties that only allow people in a certain age group are discriminating. Targeting a demographic isn't discrimination- and, frankly, I'd argue the fact we don't make anyone pay more for the event (like many parties that either don't allow or make single men pay more) would show we're trying to do AWAY with that.
-Thankfully for those concerned, the venue's bottom floor is wheelchair accessible so for those under/over 35 couples, assistance can be provided. :P (though, we don't have a problem with over-35 couples- and, additionally, never said we did)
I knew there would be an interesting discussion posting about this on IC, but figured maybe a few people might be interested. Of course, sex/kink/parties R SERIUS BIZNESS!
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can unplayful , sensilbe under 35's go.. or is it just the over 35's who have to start playing hopscotch to prove they are playful?? owned , happy and contented.x
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8 Feb 10, 4:04 PM
Purrverse
US, 6 yrs
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sub_serena wrote:
Purrverse wrote:
Oh dear, here we go again. Wasn't this the same thing as what happened with under 35 munches..?
Let me see if I can clarify some points:
-actually, the costume restriction is, in fact, placed on EVERYONE for the party. We're already welcomed more than a few over 35s to the group who have indicated they have the playful, silly attitude we're looking to create. Maybe I was insane trying to find people with that same attitude on IC, but hey.
-references so far have been people who we know, friends and friends of friends. Seems to be working.
-have you even read the website? Or are you enjoying fanning a flame war with your martyr complex?
-do you even know me? LOL! I'm about as unvanilla as one can get. Strangely, I feel that it's ok to throw a party where sex and kink CAN happen but isn't a focus- I don't see how that makes an event vanilla by any means.
-I've been helping run Kinky Salon (www.kinkysalon.com) in San Francisco for 5, 6 years, and it's not exactly just a "let's play dress up" party. Though, to be honest, I don't see what's wrong with having an event that IS a "let's play dress up" party- I just wanted one where I didn't have to worry if I wanted to fuck and/or slap my partner.
-discrimination? Um. I could say that events that require latex outfits is classist, or queer play parties are homosexist, or that the many swing parties that only allow people in a certain age group are discriminating. Targeting a demographic isn't discrimination- and, frankly, I'd argue the fact we don't make anyone pay more for the event (like many parties that either don't allow or make single men pay more) would show we're trying to do AWAY with that.
-Thankfully for those concerned, the venue's bottom floor is wheelchair accessible so for those under/over 35 couples, assistance can be provided. :P (though, we don't have a problem with over-35 couples- and, additionally, never said we did)
I knew there would be an interesting discussion posting about this on IC, but figured maybe a few people might be interested. Of course, sex/kink/parties R SERIUS BIZNESS!
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can unplayful , sensilbe under 35's go.. or is it just the over 35's who have to start playing hopscotch to prove they are playful??
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Actually, no. Playfulness/silliness required. To be proven at the door, I'm afraid. "I can't tell if you're playing some kind of feminazi mind fuck game on me or if you're trying to seduce me." -Sex and Death 101
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8 Feb 10, 4:06 PM
Doghouse_Reilly
UK(MK), 6 yrs
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Purrverse wrote:
Actually, no. Playfulness/silliness required. To be proven at the door, I'm afraid.
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I'll get back to working on my squid impression. “Some people never go crazy, What truly horrible lives they must live”
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8 Feb 10, 4:06 PM
Miss_serena
3 yrs |
Purrverse wrote:
sub_serena wrote:
Purrverse wrote:
Oh dear, here we go again. Wasn't this the same thing as what happened with under 35 munches..?
Let me see if I can clarify some points:
-actually, the costume restriction is, in fact, placed on EVERYONE for the party. We're already welcomed more than a few over 35s to the group who have indicated they have the playful, silly attitude we're looking to create. Maybe I was insane trying to find people with that same attitude on IC, but hey.
-references so far have been people who we know, friends and friends of friends. Seems to be working.
-have you even read the website? Or are you enjoying fanning a flame war with your martyr complex?
-do you even know me? LOL! I'm about as unvanilla as one can get. Strangely, I feel that it's ok to throw a party where sex and kink CAN happen but isn't a focus- I don't see how that makes an event vanilla by any means.
-I've been helping run Kinky Salon (www.kinkysalon.com) in San Francisco for 5, 6 years, and it's not exactly just a "let's play dress up" party. Though, to be honest, I don't see what's wrong with having an event that IS a "let's play dress up" party- I just wanted one where I didn't have to worry if I wanted to fuck and/or slap my partner.
-discrimination? Um. I could say that events that require latex outfits is classist, or queer play parties are homosexist, or that the many swing parties that only allow people in a certain age group are discriminating. Targeting a demographic isn't discrimination- and, frankly, I'd argue the fact we don't make anyone pay more for the event (like many parties that either don't allow or make single men pay more) would show we're trying to do AWAY with that.
-Thankfully for those concerned, the venue's bottom floor is wheelchair accessible so for those under/over 35 couples, assistance can be provided. :P (though, we don't have a problem with over-35 couples- and, additionally, never said we did)
I knew there would be an interesting discussion posting about this on IC, but figured maybe a few people might be interested. Of course, sex/kink/parties R SERIUS BIZNESS!
|
can unplayful , sensilbe under 35's go.. or is it just the over 35's who have to start playing hopscotch to prove they are playful??
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Actually, no. Playfulness/silliness required. To be proven at the door, I'm afraid.
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lol.. made me laughxx
owned , happy and contented.x
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8 Feb 10, 4:08 PM
joanne_at_sometime
UK(WD), 2 yrs
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i just bet there's a sign saying "you don't have to be mad to party here but it helps!" and someone expressing their personality through novelty socks. |
8 Feb 10, 4:35 PM
Mistress_Watchful
UK(SO), 2 yrs
£
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The bit that completely threw me...
Purrverse says "To clarify further- the references thing applies for EVERYONE. It'll be run as a private party, therefore, we want to create a sense of intimacy by having it be mostly friends and friends of friends."
By the end of the same page you say "Actually, that's been one of the things I've hated about parties here. Some munches, as well. I've found that you go to them with your friends, talk to your friends, and leave with your friends."
A little conflict going on there!
I'm pretty sure that because I'm new on the scene I won't know the right people. But that doesn't matter because although I got hugely excited about the party when I first read about it, being 36 (despite being costumey and fun, and having a partner 12 years younger than me) the age thing REALLY put me off.
I'm sure it was for my own good, I'm sure I would have felt awfully out of place, and I'm glad you saved me the embarrassment.
Good luck to the young uns though!
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