Toybox! An event by Kinky Salon London (79)

You obviously haven't been to Greenwich then....

Honestly stop with all your under/over 35 crap please?! Age has nothing to do with who a person is, how friendly and approachable they are, or how sexy, exciting, fun, off the wall or perverted they are, how many outfits, costumes and personas they have, where they drink, who they see, what they eat, how they fuck, who they fuck etc etc

There are plenty of people i know, well under 35, who have the most staid, boring, safe lives i have ever come across and some well into their 50's who are more lively and exciting than i could ever hope to be... Yes, by all means have a vetting system for these parties you run (i have one to a lesser degree for the ones i arrange), but let's not do the sad, sad thing of writing someone off just because you can't imagine them ever being able to have a life after 35...

Rant over...

"There is no such thing as liberty. You only change one sort of domination for another. All we can do is to choose our master." D. H. Lawrence
www.greenwichmunch.co.uk

My dear Friend has hit the nail on the head . This rant is spot on !!!!

Will dress the blokes with the hammers as clowns then. Nothing incites more terror than being clubbed to death by a clown. I can do science to prove this if needed.

Mmm. Science.

“Some people never go crazy, What truly horrible lives they must live”

I'm going to say this once, again, slowly.

-The way the event criteria was phrased was poorly done. I can see how it came across as ageist, which wasn't my intention.

-It is now fixed.

-We have mostly people under 35 who are volunteering to make this happen- we also have some fantastic fabulous people involved who are over 35. We might even have one or two who are 35 exactly. :P

-I regret heavily even advertising this on a board on IC because I really should've recalled how much people here like to create drama. It's not hard. If you genuinely wanted to point out that there was a wording issue, you could mention that in a non-confrontational way. Possibly even in a memo. Instead, as per the IC way, there was... well, this, pretty much.

-I should hope anyone who's met me knows I'm pretty staunchly anti-isms of all kinds. People make mistakes in how they say things. I did, I fixed it, get over it.

"I can't tell if you're playing some kind of feminazi mind fuck game on me or if you're trying to seduce me." -Sex and Death 101

Special Ed *WARNING do not click if you cannot take a joke or are too sensitive*
"These are the Phenomena that every pretty Domina is hoping at her Universitee we shall see"- W.S Gilbert

Nooooooooooo!!!! Safeword! Safeword!

"People are inherently evil, but very, very funny" - Joe Orton.

Edited 8 Feb 10, 3:03 PM by Ms_Tytania

There wasn't a wording issue. You told over 35s that they would need a reference to prove themselves costumey and interesting. That's not a wording issue, it's ageist and a PR disaster. I found being told that I would have to prove myself, quite offensive.

Having just googled the event, the only other place that I can immidiately see any interest is the one single post on LFS, and that was 2 days ago. Please don't knock the people of IC for pulling you up on something that's clearly wrong, when you're happy to take full advantage of the free advertising.

I don't disbelieve you, but perhaps next time, read things before you put your name to them??

www.thedivinemissp.co.uk

(under 35s can do that too MissP )

So...the little pedant in me is having a fit...

I like going to clubs on my own, however your "PAL" system incites exactly what you've stated above. You need to arrange to have a person to meet up before hand, "walk through the gates" ..mayhaps do your own thing...then leave with "friend" in tow.

And if people don't "have friends"...then they make them online, have a few meetups before hand so then at the door the PAL system works?

What, if it's likely you'll meet people you know when you get there? And, you can leave when you want to..on..your...own.

This isn't meant to come across as rude (it probably will)...But it's not exactly hard to start a conversation with one person or a group of people you don't know.

In my 20s I was about as boring as boring can be, though I dearly wished I could be otherwise. I suffered with depression, social phobia, I couldn't drink alcohol as it messed with my depression, and I was so anxious that having any sort of fun was just about impossible.

I'm now 36, and I've never had so much fun in my life!

I've dated women from 52 down to 25 (within 6 months of each other, as it happens), and pretty much anything in between. Physical age has bugger all to do with anything.

If you want fun, arty and silly people, then advertise for that. If you want people who enjoy dressing up, then advertise for that. Since you're going to be vetting potential attendees, there's no point to anything else.

As for how to approach giving criticism for something that is blatantly unpleasant to read...people have the right to point out that there's something seriously wrong, and to criticise people for doing so smacks of censorship to me. I understand getting the wording wrong, and fair do's for correcting that (though I personally still don't like it). But that could've been done with a "oops, we messed up, fair comment, we've corrected it now", rather than telling people off for DARING to criticise.

Personally, with that level of attitude, I wouldn't enjoy the event, regardless of my age.

Two roads diverged in a wood and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. (R. Frost)
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new (A. Einstein)
To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it. ~Confucius

Ah! Excellent question.

To create a way of maintaining the PAL system (which creates cross-responsibility while not being couple-centric or requiring singles to pay more) and yet also introducing people to other people, we also have walkaround hosts who help prevent people nursing their drinks alone (unless they want to!) by introducing them to other people. Our volunteer crew pretty much knows most of the people coming, so we're hoping to help grease that process.

It's not HARD to start those conversations, but it can be hard for some, which is why we're created this. It's been working well in San Francisco for the duration of their event, and, while I imagine it'll take tweaking, I have high hopes it'll work here. We've discussed this in meetings, and everyone seems pretty accepting of it, as do the people in our facebook group... so I think it's not unreasonable.

We'll see how it goes!

"I can't tell if you're playing some kind of feminazi mind fuck game on me or if you're trying to seduce me." -Sex and Death 101