Respect (54)

This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.

Sun 7 Feb 10, 11:06 AM
NightFox
UK(B), 9 mths Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
NF

7 Feb 10, 11:13 AM
Mister_Chris
UK(M), 7 mths

I can see your point of view.
But personally, I don't think I could have much interaction with a sub I don't have some respect for. Although I think that might be true for me in any relationship, vanilla, bdsm, business, friends, etc. I think the trust aspect of it all is needed in both directions, and it's the same for respect.

7 Feb 10, 11:18 AM
iaNIKKI
UK(LE), 11 mths

NightFox wrote:
Respect
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
NF
Guess it depends on how wide your interpretation of "respect" is.? I "respect" my sub boy for being devoted and skilled in his obedience and attentiveness to Mistress. More importantly HE respects and enjoys his position and is very happy with that. Mistress Nikki

7 Feb 10, 11:27 AM
PapaBear
UK, 5 mths

NightFox wrote:
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
Of course they do - they have a duty of care towards their sub, and respect is part and parcel of it.
Und plötzlich, weißt Du : Es ist Zeit, etwas Neues zu beginnen und dem Zauber des Anfangs zu vertrauen
Suddenly, you know: It's time to start something new and trust to the magic of new beginnings

7 Feb 10, 11:31 AM
penwiggle
UK, 3 yrs

NightFox wrote:
Respect
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
NF
In my opinion, what you are describing is a doormat, not a sub.
As a sub, if a Dom/me doesn't respect me then I won't go near them with a barge pole.
What I'm giving them is a great gift. My trust, my body, my emotions, my well being, my safety, etc. etc.
I wouldn't say I can be manipulated - I suppose in the looses sense of the word, yes. Although I would probably go more with the word controlled. Manipulation, to me, brings a sense of underhandedness, and that is not showing respect. If a Dom has to resort to manipulation, then they are not in control.
I might be hit, controlled, disciplined, hurt; I might even have used the phrase 'used and abused' from time to time. But I don't see it as being 'abused' as in the vanilla sense of the word. If a relationship with a Dom became abusive, and I didn't feel I was respected, I'd end the relationship.
Just because I am in a submissive role, and they are in a Dom/controlling role, doesn't mean either of us can disregard respecting the other. Respect isn't about power exchange.
Pen
You say Ouch like it's a bad word.

7 Feb 10, 11:31 AM
penwiggle
UK, 3 yrs

PapaBear wrote:

NightFox wrote:
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
Of course they do - they have a duty of care towards their sub, and respect is part and parcel of it.
You said that so much easier than I did.
You say Ouch like it's a bad word.

7 Feb 10, 11:44 AM
steved14
UK(TW), 3 yrs
Y! Sorry Night Fox but you know nothing ! its all about respect on both sides

7 Feb 10, 11:51 AM
NightFox
UK(B), 9 mths
steved14 wrote:
Sorry Night Fox but you know nothing ! its all about respect on both sides

7 Feb 10, 11:52 AM
NightFox
UK(B), 9 mths I put this in for debate, not as a personal perspective. I do not appreciate comments like that as you have no idea of how much, or how little I know. You seem quite willing to expound an opinion, but do not seem to have made the effort to explain what that opinion is based upon ?
NF
NightFox wrote:

steved14 wrote:
Sorry Night Fox but you know nothing ! its all about respect on both sides

Edited 7 Feb 10, 11:57 AM by NightFox

7 Feb 10, 11:54 AM
just_cassie
UK(BN), 2 yrs
NightFox wrote:
Respect
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
NF
Can submissives actually have any respect for Doms/Dommes? They manipulate them, abuse them, discipline and ignore them. How could they possibly be respected?
D/s is a mutual "game" at whatever level you play it.
I assume/hope the OP is being deliberately provocative...
cassie x

7 Feb 10, 11:58 AM
NightFox
UK(B), 9 mths Yes, it was meant to be provocative ! . steved14 did not seem to pick up on that !
just_cassie wrote:

NightFox wrote:
Respect
Can Doms/Dommes actually have any respect for subs ? They can be manipulated, abused, disciplined, ignored etc. So is it possible that they can be respected ?
NF
Can submissives actually have any respect for Doms/Dommes? They manipulate them, abuse them, discipline and ignore them. How could they possibly be respected?
D/s is a mutual "game" at whatever level you play it.
I assume/hope the OP is being deliberately provocative...
cassie x

Edited 7 Feb 10, 12:02 PM by NightFox

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