Why the feck would anybody want to do this?! (83)

Nods... can I "fourth" my own quote?

I do think ScarlettdeWinter had a good point in that maybe it has something to do with how easily one reaches orgasm and possibly also related to different mindsets of course!

Personally, occasionally being told to "stop" can be extremely hot BUT if it happened too frequently or for too long, I know I would start anticipating that to the point where it would become almost impossible to err... override...

cassie x

have I been there? yep.

would I go there again? nope.

reading this thread, the reasons seem to boil down to 'because He can', and giving the 'dom' an opportunity to laugh at his 'sub' squirming.

You've missed out the huge area of 'because he can't'. the male can only come under very particular circumstances; and it gets in the way if the female gets fed up before those circumstances are reached. hence the denial of her orgasm...

For me the Dom may be viewed as a guide, whilst the explorer may express ideas about where they hope to head towards to , but up to the guide to select which paths to walk in order to achieve this.

I accept this does require a trustworthy guide in whose map reading you are confident!

- Wulfy

My, what sharp teeth I have.

Edited 27 Jan 10, 1:48 AM by BadWulf

What is frustrating and not something I would choose, but is acceptable to me is if you are one of the few men who can successfully control (without denying for days) my orgasms, I'm happy for them to be controlled - as long as you can cope with my behaviour in between and know me well enough to actually deliver when you decide that I can come. Because if you don't I may over react substantially...

Come to the Cardiff fish and chips munch

Where did that come from?

~“Nothing is ever the same as they said it was. It's what I've never seen before that I recognise.” Diane Arbus~
~"it's what you see other times that's interesting"~ foxxx~
www.londonalternativemarket.com

Can honestly say I have never (and don't think I would ever) deny/ruin an orgasm during intercourse...

What men in all the world have shown such daring?

To Each Their Own.

You say you have felt your entire life that bringing a woman to orgasm gives you the most control you have over her. There may be some people out there who have felt their entire lives that bringing someone to orgasm and ruining it gives them that control. Or they just like having total control over the orgasm from start to finish (or non-finish) hence being the Dominant one in control of such things.

If I were a Dominant male, I would occasionally ruin the orgasms of any female sub I played with. However as it stands, I'm just a submissive female whose orgasms are rather easily attainable and therefore very easy to fuck around with in a case of letting me or not letting me come. And I don't mind if someone ruins my orgasms either by taking me to the peak and not letting me fall into the pleasurable abyss or making them painful or something else. I prefer not to orgasm a lot of the time during sex and/or play anyway. TETO once again.

Not every single orgasm has to be pleasurable and nice. After all, variety is the spice of life.

And that's why there'll be lots of people who share your attitude, lots who don't and lots who have all kinds of opinions in between.

xX Goldie Xx

You've explained it in a nutshell.

I fall into this category too. Because I'm responsive and have pretty attainable orgasms (and consider myself exceedingly lucky to be this way), I can ride whatever sensations are happening to me, be it denial or forced orgasm (painful orgasm, I've never experienced). I can certainly imagine, though, that if my orgasms were much tougher to get to, it could be a different matter.

On the switch side, I've never ruined an orgasm (well, I made the aftermath rather unpleasant once, but that's another story), though tease and denial is brilliant fun within a session. I've never denied beyond the end of the session, because I enjoy the power of making a man (or woman) come when I want them to. And I personally want them to come during the session, but that's just me. Having said that, extended denial is worth a look, and something I shall be exploring when the opportunity arrives ...

Hey - what an interesting mix of folk we are. I had a similar feeling in response to that posting but for rather different reasons. I think it's the almost the ulitimate *service* to bring a woman to orgasm; a wonderful act of submission to satisfy her desires perhaps while in chastity or at least denied oneself. Especially if it's oral, She can be in charge. Indeed a very good reason for a man to have a pony tail is that every sex toy needs a handle to allow the user greater control. (Sadly my practical experience of this is rather more limited then I'd like. )

Back to ruining or denying a woman's orgasm. It's one of those areas where I find myself "naturally" thinking it would be the opposite of what I want to do. I want to give pleasure not deny it. Though I live the opposite idea - having my own satisfaction thwarted at the last minute or denied with chastity. But the longer I spend in this world getting to know people, the more I reasise there are women out there (perhaps not many)( who would get a lot out of this. I know a woman who (unless patterns in her life have changed recently) isn't allowed to masturbate without her partner's permission, and that amounts to virtually never, and is only allowed to refer to her cut with a word she finds utterly cringeworthy, "pussy". And she gets a lot out of this sort of control. And once I realise that someone is getting satisfaction from something, I can begin to envisage providing that control (in the manner of offerring a service) myself.

Service topping is reasonably well discussed on this site, and I think I'm describing something similar, a sort of service Dom-ing.

Again though, as usual with me, this is mainly speculation and second hand knowledge rather than being based in experience.

P.S. Also I'm answering without having read through the thread - apologies if it's already been said.

Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/226772/

Edited 27 Jan 10, 8:24 AM by wonderer