20 Jan 10, 11:57 AM
AstronautMikeDexter
UK(E), 2 yrs |
IndelibleMarker wrote:
Danbuc wrote:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
That's actually true, so I apologise - well, at least the very first sentence of what was said. Men aren't biologically hornier than women just because they have higher levels of testosterone.
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It is true that the men who have the greatest amount of sex have the most testosterone in their blood. But that doesn't tell you anything about whether testosterone makes you horny or (as appears increasingly likely) having more sex makes you produce more testosterone.
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Not necessarily. Sex can help build testosterone but only in a limited way. There are many other factors, such as masturbation, diet and nutrition, weight training, sleep, adequate fluid intake etc: http://fitness.suite101.com/article.cfm/boost_yo... which have to be considered.
What actually are your sources on the things you're saying because as it says there; German scientists have found that having an erection boosts testosterone levels and recommend having at least one per day. So it's not specifically sex which increases testosterone, apparently. It's the physical process of an erection and ejaculation. Sexual intercourse can also increase your testosterone levels, but it's more linked to the physical exertion alongside the erection, to ejaculation.
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Well I'd only read about it directly linked to sex but nonetheless what you've just put indicates that it's the sexual activity (erection, masturbation etc.) that increases testosterone and not the testosterone that leads to the sexual activity ---
Ha!
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20 Jan 10, 12:14 PM
IndelibleMarker
UK(E), 6 yrs
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Danbuc wrote:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
Danbuc wrote:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
That's actually true, so I apologise - well, at least the very first sentence of what was said. Men aren't biologically hornier than women just because they have higher levels of testosterone.
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It is true that the men who have the greatest amount of sex have the most testosterone in their blood. But that doesn't tell you anything about whether testosterone makes you horny or (as appears increasingly likely) having more sex makes you produce more testosterone.
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Not necessarily. Sex can help build testosterone but only in a limited way. There are many other factors, such as masturbation, diet and nutrition, weight training, sleep, adequate fluid intake etc: http://fitness.suite101.com/article.cfm/boost_yo... which have to be considered.
What actually are your sources on the things you're saying because as it says there; German scientists have found that having an erection boosts testosterone levels and recommend having at least one per day. So it's not specifically sex which increases testosterone, apparently. It's the physical process of an erection and ejaculation. Sexual intercourse can also increase your testosterone levels, but it's more linked to the physical exertion alongside the erection, to ejaculation.
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Well I'd only read about it directly linked to sex but nonetheless what you've just put indicates that it's the sexual activity (erection, masturbation etc.) that increases testosterone and not the testosterone that leads to the sexual activity
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I know... We seem to be going round in circles... I said that nearly an hour ago:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
Men aren't biologically hornier than women just because they have higher levels of testosterone.
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Kisses to all you fabioso people!
Patrick
IM
(Next London U35 Munch Details)
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20 Jan 10, 12:15 PM
AstronautMikeDexter
UK(E), 2 yrs |
IndelibleMarker wrote:
I know... We seem to be going round in circles... I said that nearly an hour ago:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
Men aren't biologically hornier than women just because they have higher levels of testosterone.
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Ah well, yes. Ignore me entirely ---
Ha!
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20 Jan 10, 1:47 PM
Elysium
UK(EH), 5 yrs
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Dominance is much more than boiling women down to power through denial of sex and male dominance through physical prowess. I'd go as far as to say that these traits are pretty unimportant in inspiring submission and dominance in people.
If you follow your logic, if a woman tried this with a dominant male, he'd overpower her and just rape her. Or, if he wants to stay within the law, he'd tell her and her golden snatch to go fuck herself and find a less manipulative person.
The central tenet of D/s is obviously consent. The dominant and submissive both choose to express their sexualities in the way that most pleases them, with the person(s) that they value. You can't really teach dominance if there is no character traits to back it up and vice versa with submission.
If you're going to "teach" female dominance. Please, please don't get bogged down in the male fantasy stereotypes and biological determinist crap. Talk to dominant women who live the lifestyle about their experiences and in particular their awakenings. I'll probably get flamed for this, but try and avoid those where money complicates their motivations.
Most women, including most dominant women love being fucked by a real cock. With so much of the femdom universe focused on denial and objectification of women as domme fantasy robots. A lot of femdom ends up denying women and pleasing men. I really think femdom is blurred through a really fucked up misogynistic lense. As most of it is motivated by male fantasy, not female desire. As a male switch, when I'm subbing, I'm focused on her pleasure. I want to be used as a tool of her desire. Not what she thinks her desire should be to please me. If I want to get exactly what I want, then I dominate.
If you manage by and large to bypass the aforementioned lense. Then you would be providing the wider male submissive and female dominant population a great and unique service. As opposed to lining up and repeating the same old tropes and espousing the same old archetypes that really distort and hurt the image of femdom in a lot of women's minds. |
20 Jan 10, 1:57 PM
Ms_Tytania
6 yrs |
Elysium wrote:
Most women, including most dominant women love being fucked by a real cock. With so much of the femdom universe focused on denial and objectification of women as domme fantasy robots. A lot of femdom ends up denying women and pleasing men. I really think femdom is blurred through a really fucked up misogynistic lense. As most of it is motivated by male fantasy, not female desire.
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You are spot on. If you look at femdom websites, the pictures show very attractive women - not Dommes, but models, chosen by their looks and not by their sexual preference, playing with men. The men in the pictures are almost always distinctively in contrast with the women's attractiveness: older, unfit, ungroomed.
The message is clear: men, who created the site, and for whom the site was also created, want to feel reassured in a fantasy where Goddesses will fancy them, regardless of their level of attractiveness. They feel threatened by the presence of younger, pretty men. Femdom, the way we see it in 99% of websites and clubs, is a mysoginistic, male creation, by the boys, and for the boys only.
When I've turned up at a club or event with a pretty boy on tow, the men accused me subtly you having them 'because they are easy prey". Well, not as easy as someone who knows he's well over the hill, believe me. Of course, the pretty boys remind the not so pretty older men, that we have a sex drive and sexual needs and wants, but they can't be satisfied by any old tom, dick and harry. And that hurts, because it's truly emasculating and disempowering, and *not* in the make believe sense they've grown used to from watching too many femdom websites. "People are inherently evil, but very, very funny" - Joe Orton.
Edited 20 Jan 10, 2:06 PM by Ms_Tytania
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20 Jan 10, 2:13 PM
IndelibleMarker
UK(E), 6 yrs
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Elysium wrote:
If you follow your logic, if a woman tried this with a dominant male, he'd overpower her and just rape her. Or, if he wants to stay within the law, he'd tell her and her golden snatch to go fuck herself and find a less manipulative person.
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Have a gander at the example I gave of an effective FemDomme technique again and bare in mind I say AN effective FemDomme technique - not the only effective technique. I'm not saying in the slightest that it only boils down to sexual denial - but I am saying that it is a method. A powerfully successful one at that.
I specifically mentioned that in the modern world a man using his physical strength to overpower a woman is illegal so that's not following my logic in the slightest. And staying within the law, yes, he might tell her to go fuck herself - meaning that they aren't suited for a D/s relationship because he is too Dominant. However, I think that that occurring would be surprisingly rare - though I admit I am basing that on a generalised character assessment, rather than any factual or statistical evidence.
The majority of men will most likely comply if it's brought in slowly and carefully enough - particularly if they have gone without sex for a while (perhaps the couple have been apart for work) and it is introduced as "a little game"... Kisses to all you fabioso people!
Patrick
IM
(Next London U35 Munch Details)
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20 Jan 10, 2:20 PM
Elysium
UK(EH), 5 yrs
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Ms_Tytania wrote:
Elysium wrote:
Most women, including most dominant women love being fucked by a real cock. With so much of the femdom universe focused on denial and objectification of women as domme fantasy robots. A lot of femdom ends up denying women and pleasing men. I really think femdom is blurred through a really fucked up misogynistic lense. As most of it is motivated by male fantasy, not female desire.
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You are spot on. If you look at femdom websites, the pictures show very attractive women - not Dommes, but models, chosen by their looks and not by their sexual preference, playing with men. The men in the pictures are almost always distinctively in contrast with the women's attractiveness.
The message is clear: men, who created the site, and for whom the site was also created, want to feel reassured in a fantasy where Goddesses will fancy them, regardless of their level of attractiveness. They feel threatened by the presence of younger, pretty men. Femdom, the way we see it in 99% of websites and clubs, is a mysoginistic, male creation, by the boys, and for the boys only.
When I've turned up at a club or event with a pretty boy on tow, the men accused me subtly you having them 'because they are easy prey". Well, not as easy as someone who knows he's well over the hill, believe me. Of course, the pretty boys remind the not so pretty older men, that we have a sex drive and sexual needs and wants, but they can't be satisfied by any old tom, dick and harry. And that hurts, because it's truly emasculating and disempowering, and *not* in the make believe sense they've grown used to from watching too many femdom websites.
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I find most femdom porn a complete turn off. meninpain.com is probably the biggest, the older stuff is a little interesting. But, as I've learned more about this side of myself, it's gradually just gotten worse. It turns me off because I don't see the women as actually enjoying themselves. Luckily for me, amateur femdom porn is pretty widespread with the advent of xtube etc. Even then, it's pretty rare that I'll find something that flicks my sub switch.
You could make the same sort of arguments against vanilla porn, which also by and large turns me off. Porn never claims to be realistic, any man who expects his sex life to be like a porno needs a huge reality check.
Unfortunately, femdom porn is much more influential upon male submissive sexuality than nilla porn is on nilla sexuality. I believe this is because of a shortage of dominant female desire actually penetrating the wider culture. As it's drowned out by male fantasy.
Boards like this one do go a long way to helping dominant female desire be heard. But, it's hard to be heard over the vast number of unrealistic male submissives and the women who cater for them.
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20 Jan 10, 2:21 PM
IndelibleMarker
UK(E), 6 yrs
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Elysium wrote:
Most women, including most dominant women love being fucked by a real cock. With so much of the femdom universe focused on denial and objectification of women as domme fantasy robots. A lot of femdom ends up denying women and pleasing men. I really think femdom is blurred through a really fucked up misogynistic lense. As most of it is motivated by male fantasy, not female desire.
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Agree entirely
Ms_Tytania wrote:
<snip>...it's truly emasculating and disempowering, and *not* in the make believe sense they've grown used to from watching too many femdom websites.
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Who says it has to be make believe fantasy!? I've switched and been Dommed my a number of people (well, about 5) and every single one of them is bloody gorgeous!  Kisses to all you fabioso people!
Patrick
IM
(Next London U35 Munch Details)
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20 Jan 10, 2:22 PM
Elysium
UK(EH), 5 yrs
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IndelibleMarker wrote:
Elysium wrote:
If you follow your logic, if a woman tried this with a dominant male, he'd overpower her and just rape her. Or, if he wants to stay within the law, he'd tell her and her golden snatch to go fuck herself and find a less manipulative person.
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Have a gander at the example I gave of an effective FemDomme technique again and bare in mind I say AN effective FemDomme technique - not the only effective technique. I'm not saying in the slightest that it only boils down to sexual denial - but I am saying that it is a method. A powerfully successful one at that.
I specifically mentioned that in the modern world a man using his physical strength to overpower a woman is illegal so that's not following my logic in the slightest. And staying within the law, yes, he might tell her to go fuck herself - meaning that they aren't suited for a D/s relationship because he is too Dominant. However, I think that that occurring would be surprisingly rare - though I admit I am basing that on a generalised character assessment, rather than any factual or statistical evidence.
The majority of men will most likely comply if it's brought in slowly and carefully enough - particularly if they have gone without sex for a while (perhaps the couple have been apart for work) and it is introduced as "a little game"...
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If the man is only complying to get his dick wet, is it really submission? |
20 Jan 10, 2:30 PM
IndelibleMarker
UK(E), 6 yrs
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Elysium wrote:
IndelibleMarker wrote:
Elysium wrote:
If you follow your logic, if a woman tried this with a dominant male, he'd overpower her and just rape her. Or, if he wants to stay within the law, he'd tell her and her golden snatch to go fuck herself and find a less manipulative person.
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Have a gander at the example I gave of an effective FemDomme technique again and bare in mind I say AN effective FemDomme technique - not the only effective technique. I'm not saying in the slightest that it only boils down to sexual denial - but I am saying that it is a method. A powerfully successful one at that.
I specifically mentioned that in the modern world a man using his physical strength to overpower a woman is illegal so that's not following my logic in the slightest. And staying within the law, yes, he might tell her to go fuck herself - meaning that they aren't suited for a D/s relationship because he is too Dominant. However, I think that that occurring would be surprisingly rare - though I admit I am basing that on a generalised character assessment, rather than any factual or statistical evidence.
The majority of men will most likely comply if it's brought in slowly and carefully enough - particularly if they have gone without sex for a while (perhaps the couple have been apart for work) and it is introduced as "a little game"...
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If the man is only complying to get his dick wet, is it really submission?
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Again - you're not following the example through properly. I go on to say that after it's been introduced the Domme can then push things further and away from being 'just a game' using a huge variety of methods like orgasm control, chastity, reward and punishment, tease and denial, chores, humiliation, objectification etc etc. NLP methods of anchoring and idea stacking can be brought in and over time it starts to become real in the submissives mind. They always have the choice to get up and walk out of course... But they choose not to. Kisses to all you fabioso people!
Patrick
IM
(Next London U35 Munch Details)
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