On 'Love' as Performance Art (12)

I'll drag my reply over here so as to keep the discussion to one weblog:

But they're such fun! You make the mistake of believing that I am advising people not to read these pieces, when in fact I advise simply not falling for the displays.

Writing direct messages to individuals for the whole world to see as a form of catharsis? That seems far less likely than it being a form of passive-aggressive display. Even a control mechanism.

Yes, they can, and if that's the case then the correspondent should take the hint and STFU, because if that is what is going on then the weblogs can be considered harassment. There's a certain person on here, and people will know exactly whom I mean, who specialises in harassing someone through open address weblogs. It's not welcome, especially for the target. However, blocked lines of communication are almost never the driving force in these cases. In reality these exchanges take place in the public domain almost invariably because both participants crave attention and affirmation. They want to be seen to be in the right, or to be indulging in enough self-flagellation to be deemed forgivable when they've been in the wrong, often to the point of wannabe martyrdom. Most importantly though, they're a control mechanism: 'People agree with me' or 'No-one is disagreeing with me' and so the display becomes a pressure point upon the other party.

I think that these displays are fascinating and often highly enjoyable, in much the same way that reading a good piece of melodrama can be. I encourage all to bear witness to the performances. Just don't fall for the crap.

Edited 23 Dec 09, 2:21 AM by Thought_Policeman

how can you be sure you know whats really going on?

in writers/readers or antagonists mind

public displays of love have been going on for centuaries... it's not a weblog thing, some of us find it refreshing in this world of hate/greed and shit

and as for the erm antagonist going around on some attention seeking, self flagillation crap or whatever how can you be sure what they say is crap? how can you be sure thats what they are doing? do you know them personally and know this to be true? or are you just trying a bit of self flagillation and attention seeking?

the bloggs that really get me are the ones of those who are so up their own arse, that they think they know everything that is going on in everyones mind and action and then declare it publicly to be the case

show me something different xkx

It's a total lack of respect for a person's wishes.

Perverted Pederast Puppetmistress Pimp Pandering to the Patriarchy... apparently

(Sorry, couldn't resist!)

judy

I must be only one in a million (© David Bowie)

People are really quite predictable and these specimens are especially obvious because they go on and on for months about their fucked-up affairs, making sure that every single moment of it is documented in full public view. If they weren't attention whores they would keep the minutiae of their private lives, you know, private.

This isn't love poetry or serenading below a maiden's bedroom window that we're talking about here. The 'relationships' are drama-laden clusterfucks and the weblogs are dedicated to arguments, apologies, break-ups, et al: The sort of stuff that people who aren't drama-crazed fucknuts tend to keep to themselves.

Theda gets it. ^

And miss the chance for public drama? That's UNPOSSIBLE!

Edited 23 Dec 09, 12:35 PM by Thought_Policeman

"Nothing saves anyone's life, Sir. It just postpones their death." - Posner , The History Boys.
All it takes for bad English to prevail is for literate people to do nothing.

ChristmasFairy wrote: Some people are attention whores.

And others just express themselves in their own way as they feel like doing at the time

I agree with others that it's a bit arrogant and presumptious to assume that you know exactly the motivation behind someone's posts/blogs when you don't even know them.

You overlook the fact that in constantly pissing their personal lives up the public wall these people guarantee that everyone knows they rather well. Indeed, that seems to be their great desire.

I don't overlook it, I just don't agree with you. Just because someone wears their heart on their sleeve on here and expresses themselves in ways that you wouldn't... doesn't mean you're going to know them intimately, and certainly not enough (imo of course) to read so much sinister stuff into their motivation for posting. I just think some people need to find an outlet to get things off their chest before they can move on.

Except they don't move on. These people post over and over again.

So let's consider an equivalent act: Someone calls their ex-lover and 'bares their soul' declaring love and revealing much about both themselves and the other person. However, they choose to do this from their office in a major supermarket and to broadcast this over the tannoy for all to hear their dirty little secrets. Act of love and kindness?