This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.
| 13 Dec 09, 6:16 PM DearMrsB UK(PO), 6 yrs  |
It is difficult when you have children living with you but we have found lots of little ways to keep the dynamic going. I always bath first then g bathes in my water. He loves a hot bath and I prefer a cooler one. Most evenings I allow g to add more hot water but he knows a tepid bath might be his lot. Some times g stands in the corner of the bathroom hands behind his back, nipple clamps on acting as my clothes horse and towel rail. When the boys were younger g was tethered to the bed by an ankle, so if they came in after a bad dream they didn't notice. Now he wears his collar to bed every night. When we go shopping I never unpack the trolley or pack away. I leave this to g. I just stand and watch. I have total financial control. g gets a small allowance. We tried 24/7 chastity but it isn't very practical as g gets very tetchy if he sleeps badly. A tired stroppy sub is no use to me. These are a few of the little things we do to reinforce our relationship on a daily basis. Its really up to you on what suits you best. Looking in from the 'nilla outside I think g is probably perceived as being a “bit fussy” for a chap. As most men don't usually look after their partners quite so attentively as g. And I am seen as a very lucky lady. | |
| 13 Dec 09, 6:23 PM Super_Slut_321 UK(MK), 4 yrs  |
I believe there are devices that can be fitted, rather like a male chastity belt. I believe that one such item sells under the name CBT 2000. However, it is a little draconian. If you visit the website: http://www.theenglishmansion.com/ you will see that they have a number of S & M videos for sale. There is a preview area where you can view a few seconds of each video for free. There are one or two in which a gentleman who is wearing such a device is caged and forced to watch a woman while she pleasures herself. | |
| 15 Dec 09, 11:20 PM MissLilithG UK(L), 3 yrs |
I know what you mean, mine carries the bags, I get breakfast in bed every weekend and I am amused that people are jealous that my man is so attentive. Some things are done just as he wants to do so in order to please me, others are done by order. I still have control over if and when he cums and if I allow it, where he cums and if he has to lick it up afterwards (a consequence of being allowed to cum). Also thinking of a remote controlled vibrating butt plug I can use on him in public for my amusement. Would be more amused if I set someone elses off by accident in a crowded place! "The light at the end of the tunnel... is a train!" | |
| 16 Dec 09, 1:58 PM Switchy_one UK(LN), 5 yrs |
Thank you all that replied to my initial question, some ideas I really like, others we already do, maybe I didnt realise as I should that some of the things we do, he in particular, are serving me and making it more than perhaps I thought it was. I cant get chastity into my head though, this is not how I see our relationship progressing, I am not of course suggesting it isnt the right and proper thing for many, the replies I have had both here and to my memo's show that an awful lot of people both Dom and sub seem to like this kind of control and I can see why, but for me I would rather, and I do, simply order him/her not to come, also I have read in memo's that the 'sexual urges go after being locked up for a while' I would be most upset should that happen. Even during a normal day, when we are alone and it is obvious who is in charge, it is a sexual feeling between us, he / she isnt sub to get sex, it is the submission that sexually excites him/her and to be honest me to. Especially when we have an 'evening' it is so exciting and the Dom side of me gets very turned on and indeed wants the sexual urges to be there, maybe I have this slave thing wrong ? or maybe we are all different and different strokes for different folks. I would be interested to know though, is it always non sexual 24/7? or close to 24/7 as I think the whole nine yards may be too ambitious for us and to be frank not really plausable, for us at the least, because the sex is what started all this off and keeps it going, along with all we do in our Femdom relationship, there is always that sexual feeling between us, is that a fair comment on shall I say Longer Domination other than 24/7. I have memos where the slave is alowed to serve his Mistress orally but no penetration, I can see the control would be great but itc does seem a little like cutting off your nose to spite your face, doesnt it? or am I missing something?. The one thing I would really like to do is turn 'her' into a repeater, 'she' does still have the 'man' thing of after comming its pizza time and then sleep, while I would like to keep the atmoshpere and indeed all that goes with it going,. or at least re visit Before bed time, any advice there would be great. | |
| 16 Dec 09, 2:32 PM chrisp UK(E), 6 yrs |
It's certainly always sexual for us when we play. I don't get to cum until Jane is completely satisfied, exhausted even. Opening doors and carrying bags is just something a gentleman does naturally. c | |
| 16 Dec 09, 3:05 PM LadyEmmaCavendish UK(N), 8 yrs |
I would like to think so, sadly this is no longer the case for all men. Gentlemen are difficult to find. Lady Emma | |
| 16 Dec 09, 4:11 PM bbound UK(CF), 9 yrs |
I'm sub to my wife. We have 2 school-aged children. My wife has full control 24/7. At first, we spent a lot of time, discussing how the relationship would work. Basically, she is in charge and her word goes at all times. She told me all the things I was doing wrong and I am punished for failing to please her in any way (I maintain a diary/log and a weekly report for her). She makes all the decisions that affect us, albeit with my input. She owns all our money - my role is to keep our accounts for her. I am not allowed to spend more than £20 without permission (except for food shopping - all my job). A typical day would be waking her with a cup of tea, getting her breakfast, laying her dressing table, choosing (then cleaning) her shoes, packing her handbag (she works; I work from home); helping her dress, carring her things to the car (I open door for her), tidy up when she has left. She gives me chores for each day. I clean, wash and iron and I prepare all meals and do all dishes. I am at her beck and call in the evenings and help her prepare for bed. There's lots of other things involved, but it keeps me busy, believe me! Did I forget lots of foot massages? Chastity is part of her control. I wear a CB6000 24/7 and only get released when she says. I find that it is a physical reminder of my submission and actually love wearing it. It does not diminish my sexual ability - rather hands full control over to her. My wife sets out how I behave. I can be a pain in the neck, constantly fawning over her, especially when she has a day off (and the kids are in school). That's when I am usually tied up out of her way. I am disciplined and punished when we have the opportunity. It's important to discuss how things are, especially in the early weeks/months. This lifestyle has made a real difference to our (24-year) marriage. We are both far happier than at any stage. Finally, it is important to us to keep the lifestyle private from the kids. They both noticed a difference in the way we behave towards each other, but also noticed the improved atmosphere in the relationship. The fact she works harder than I do (and out all day) is the excuse for me doing all the work. They have accepted the way we live and are both seemingly happy. It's not a bad thing to set an example of old-fashioned male chivalry anyway! Good luck to the OP - you have a great opportunity for a lovely lifestyle. Do what you both think is best for you, but make sure you communicate.... |
