This post is on the Other BDSM web board.
| 11 Nov 09, 10:25 PM the_unsub 2 yrs |
Well yes and no, it isn't always about sex. Sometimes it shapes the entire relationship dynamic is it's d/s (As I've said before I'm not experienced here so I may be way off the mark, but speaking from my life experiences, I'd say that I was naturally submissive long before sex drives kicked in. So it's not just about kinky sex which is the part that family don't need to know about) A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step - Confucius | |
| 11 Nov 09, 10:39 PM FionualaHLC UK(RG), 5 yrs   |
My mum and I laugh over the phone as we compare the use of our vibrators, my sister and I have discussed floggers and wax play, so my family know and were far from shocked, but my parents were swingers when we were toddlers and had open parties in the house, so it isn't surprising that they don't find it a shock at all. It varies with friends and more distant family, some know, even if they don't know the detail, I don't hide it, but don't make a big song and dance about telling them either. | |
| 11 Nov 09, 10:46 PM spankAlicious UK(N), 4 yrs |
I told all my friends at uni the ones who i knew i wouldn't offend. practically all of them. My family know because someone sent them pictures and information of me. but my sisters cool with it. My new friends know what i am into and i feel comfortable with my decision to tell them. i think only one person has looked at me and been funny about it but that's a small percentage to the amount who i have. i guess its like me showing off my new shoes some will like them others will tolerate them some will not like them at all. :D x X x He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at! :D | |
| 11 Nov 09, 10:51 PM tails18 UK(OX), 2 yrs |
I probs will never tell my family about it, just the same as my sex life, they don't need to know.
That being said if it were found out I wouldn't lie about it. a few friends know, 2 becuase they have pretty interesting lifes nways, so this is not out of the norm, & 2 other girls who are semi into it, they just love going pedalstal alot lol X Edited 11 Nov 09, 11:01 PM by tails18 | |
| 11 Nov 09, 10:58 PM Donnachaidh FR, 6 yrs |
Sometimes you have no choice about what everyone knows. Occasionally we get outed. We were, and as a result largely ostracised by most of the folks in the hamlet in which we lived (a puritanical little village called Holywell Green, near Halifax). That said, my parents already knew (and even at 84 years old are remarkably understanding.) Now we live in a village in Provence. Today was a chilly day, the temperature never went above 19 celsius. So what can I say? Tell everyone sbout yout kink, and if they don't like you anymore, move to Provence. Donnachaidh | |
| 11 Nov 09, 11:03 PM swindonbdsmer 2 yrs |
Like someone said its like you sex life. what yours is yours. However my best friend knows she is worse than me and would be an excellent pro, but has more fun not being. My mam caught me on phone to a pro-domme when I was 19 discussing a session and thought it was disgusting, I believe that the UK media as a lot to answer for in its coverage of BDSM activities remember News of The World stories all the time and thats what Preaching to the Perverted was all about. Have tried to explain to ex-wife and ex-partners but they do not understand or see it as wrong. perceptions isn't it. Swindonbdsmer (Matt) | |
| 11 Nov 09, 11:11 PM Unschuldiger_Teufel UK(ST), 3 yrs |
Most of my good friends know I am kinky. The girls know more than the guys, as we have the girly conversations about sex etc, but none of them reacted badly to hearing anything. A few of them were surprised when I first told them, but that was all. My parents don't know, and hopefully never will. I've no idea what they'd do or say, but I know it wouldn't be good. I'm hoping to be able to talk to my sisters about it when they're older (they're still only little at the moment) as they seem a lot more open than my parents, and we get on quite well. I wouldn't go into lots of detail with them, but I'd like them to know this sort of stuff existed so they can make their own decisions about whether or not they like it - I only found out about it last year, and felt a little naive at my lack of knowledge. Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus. | |
| 11 Nov 09, 11:12 PM ekane582 UK, 2 yrs |
Hi I have many kinks some I have tried and most I have not. I told told none of them to friends or family. If we were all open about our sexual preferences. Is there not a chance of the society we live in becoming hedonist. Is it not a bit like saying I go to the toilet 3 times a day and I fart regulary. Some information can be to much for some. Sex I think is one of them. | |
| 12 Nov 09, 12:04 AM lisal 9 yrs |
What I said here http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/posts/254481/0/...
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| 12 Nov 09, 12:16 AM strictlyshy UK(EH), 2 yrs |
Hey new here and first post, can i get a w00t w00t?
ok maybe not...
i told one of my best friends once, unfortunately i didn't think about the fact that i was still in high school at the time, told him about my Mistress at the time but didn't go into any great detail, thought i could trust him but turns out by the end of the week it was all over our year at school and i was pretty much a laughing stock Anyway, live and learn, everyones experience will obviously be different and if i'd told a different person at a different time in my life then it would of probably been a better idea. Recently i told my cousin, she was finiding it hard to feel part of the family and had/has trust issues, i decided it would show her how much i trust her and she has kept it a secret, i'm glad i did because it did wonders for her i think, we talk a lot more and i think she appreciated that i put myself out there to try and help her. So really it can be good but i probably wouldn't say anything to anyone else or atleast not until the situation calls for it, i don't think its the same as coming out but thats my own personal opinion, i think being gay is alot more accepted. anyone else we have a bum deal? lol
Thanks for listening if Y/you read this, feels good to be able to talk about it openly without fear of ridicule, looking forward to lots more chat |
