Equality in D/s (96)

I wouldn't have thought there was much of an argument about the fact that submissives enjoy submitting, or do so because it fulfills them.

Sorry if you feel I invalidated your relationship though, it wasn't my intent just my opinion, probably true to say that the way I framed the opening of my opinion could have been more balanced and I am sorry that the preoccupation has been with that rather than the actual meaning behind the post.

As twue as words spoken under interrogation.
Souci Selfless, After I have had a fag, Controversial X (too many middle names)

Edited 8 Nov 09, 3:32 PM by Souci_X

I don't understand it either.

"I think they are equal, notions of inequality to me suggests a lack of understanding about what submission is. "

- I assure you i have some understanding about what submission is....to me, I accept that it not everyone's understanding, but it has been a very important in my life for some number of years. I try not to see things as quite so black and white as you appear to and accept that there are other people for whom their view of submission is very diferent and no less valid than mine.

Kind regards,

Polly

"Indifference to me, is the epitome of evil. Be a sound not an echo"

There are as many different 'understandings' of submission as there are people involved in D/s. *My* understanding simply differs from yours. However, I have a considerable 'understanding' of my own submission.

f x

Cookie Monster In Bondage!

But what about relationships (such as mine) where my needs aren't met? I have to do without some things (material and emotional) but that is part of the submission. I have to forego my needs to meet his. This is not always enjoyable.

That's inequality.

N x

Why do you do that?

See I know what you mean, part of it to me is putting someone else first but again thats because I generally am more fulfilled that way.

I think I probably simplified it too much, maybe I am totally wrong, maybe there are lots of submissives out there who hate doing it, makes me wonder why they do, thats probably another thread though

As twue as words spoken under interrogation.
Souci Selfless, After I have had a fag, Controversial X (too many middle names)

Now I've heard it all...

Why? A whole load of reasons..I never said I hate doing it. I said there are things that are not enjoyable. There is a difference.

N x

I've sometimes found that an event might not be enjoyable at the time, but later, on reflection, it becomes immensely enjoyable! I've suffered and endured.

f x

Cookie Monster In Bondage!

...and this girl guesses your need to serve is such a large part of you that that need trumps lesser needs most of the time. You have dogs who give you unconditional love and affection (in a non sexual context one hastens to add) ....but they can't fill your D/s needs.

This girl too hates , loathes and detests parts and moments of what is within her relationship ...and some things she dislikes a lot of the time.... but on balance the relationship is positive and fulfilling...just not in ways she learnt were 'nice' in a vanilla context.

In fact its the 'not niceness' that keeps her there to some extent (thanks emotional masochism)...the relationship couldn't possibly be equal.... if it was equal...if this girl perceived it as equal...she wouldnt be here.

That said...in many things we are equal....but thats becuase he lets this girl be equal....not becuase she is.

This girl can't imaging having a relationship based on equality....power and control are a fetish...its feels good from either side....as long as its not equal.

CAAN statement of principle.

N x