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Bisexuality and same-sex play partners. (64)

This post is on the North London (N) topics page and the Other BDSM web board.

25 Apr 10, 8:58 AM
Lj_switch
UK, 3 yrs

If you'd asked me if I would ever "play" with a man a few months ago, I would have emphatically said no. How things change.

The opportunity for some private play arose, initially to try some EStim equipment. Several sessions down the line, I've had the opportunity to try a load of other exciting things and had a great time, developing a good friendship into the bargain

Perhaps it is because the play is non-sexual that I am comfortable with this, and that his lady sub is present, usually making "helpful" comments *lol*

But I don't see myself ever developing a sexual interest in men, just as I don't see my lovely play-partner developing a sexual interest in me. Friends in kink

be a switch, double your fun

25 Apr 10, 10:35 AM
Lady_Susan
UK, 5 yrs

I tend to be gentler with female subs - don't know why, maybe I identify a bit more.

When I want your opinion, I'll thrash it out of you

1 May 10, 9:12 PM
straight_lad_trainer
3 yrs

sodsta wrote:
Bisexuality and same-sex play partners.

I was thinking the other day about bisexuality and how it applies to the way people view the different genders in regards to play.

For example, specifically when it comes to kink and BDSM, do you view men and women (and all the genders in between) differently in terms of how you would play with them? Do you have a gender preference when it comes to play partners, even if you identify as bisexual or queer?

I ask because I know several self-identified bisexual Dommes who have said that while they are definitely sexually attracted to women and have been or would like to be sexually intimate with a woman, they would have no interest in dominating or playing with one.

I was curious to know if other people have similar feelings when it comes to playing and gender preferences. Even if you identify as bi or queer, when it comes to playing, is there one gender you prefer over the other/s?

I most definitely prefer female subs. The male sub would have to be 'straight' or bi curious.

That is my personal preference.

But then I don't identify myself as bi or queer

1 May 10, 11:11 PM
Incandescence
UK, 3 yrs

What an interesting thread.

Until very recently I thought my sexual/gender preference was completely fixed and my BDSM preference was very much connected with that. Over the past year, however, I've realised it's all very fluid (in particular the BDSM part) and the two don't really need to be that closely related.

I identify as hetrosexual. I don't find women sexually attractive and couldn't imagine myself being in a relationship or being in love with one. However, I have had a sexual encounter with one which I was much more comfortable with than I thought I would be. I'm not sure but I think that's because my male partner at the time was also involved. I think being with a female 1-1 would nothing for me. I would be happy to have encounters with females but only with my partner too. I'm not sure if that makes me hetrosexual or bisexual? I auppose I always think of bisexual as being attracted to both male and female.

In BDSM I used to think I could only bottom and only to men. I now know I can top too and am happy to top both male and female but don't think I could bottom to a female. I'm not sure if that's because I know I can top without it being sexual for me. I get a huge rush from it but itls different to the sexual rush I get when I play with Ollie. I'm not sure whether I can bottom without the sexuality (I haven't had enough experience of it to know) which is perhaps why I think I might not be able to bottom to a female (or maybe because bottoming isn't really my thing at the minute)

I have learned though that pretty much anything is possible so I never say never now.

Crikey, it's all very complicated

@Strictly_SnM discussion group
-:Marquis DeSade:- There are thorns everywhere, but along the path of vice, roses bloom above them.