Aftercare (0)

Polka_Doll's profile

Polka_Doll

I've been thinking a lot lately about Aftercare in play settings.

• How often is it needed?
• What degree does it need to occur to?
• At what point do you hit sub drop?
• How can you stop this? Or at least how can you lessen the effect of it
• And does the play need to be extreme for all of this to affect you

The best example I had of aftercare was with a friend of mine who I had some pretty big humiliation play with, he made me feel appreciated throughout the scene, talked me down afterwards and followed me up with a phonecall the next day. I never suffered with those sneaking doubts at his hands. The "did I do everything right" feeling that nags you, or the "does he really think I'm a dirty slut" kick in the old esteem.

I guess as a submissive I often crave attention, and often my sub psyche feels some kind of loss of the attention which I had, contributing to a sub drop. And I guess even mild play leaves hugely elevated amounts of hormones (endorphins, adrenaline and what not) coursing through my body. The chemical settling down can be in itself unsettling, and I guess uncontrollable.

I often think I'm over sensitive. Or tired. Or bogged down with the other stresses of life.... Or am I just suffering with lack of care...?